A Personal Update and Some Observations

-wondering if someone actually has released some form of neurotoxic weapon in Arizona and Florida -Arizona

Hai everybody.  It’s me, justice seeker extraordinaire, Kelly.  I will apologize now for tonights blog because it is not what you have all come to expect.  I’m very tired and the news I got today did not leave me feeling jovial.  I promise I will be back to normal by tomorrow.  Most of you know I have severe PTSD and agoraphobia and BWS – the real ones, not the made up Stabby ones.  Because of this, I cannot work and I survive on a disability pension.  It is $796 per month.  The government just decided to cut it by $20 per month.

The way my mind works is an interesting thing, at least according to my Psychiatrist, my Doctor, my Mailman my Dogs, my cat and my Guinea Pig.  I really need to get a fish.  Anyway, I’ve been rolling around in my head for the last couple of days what exactly is in the fucking water in Florida and Arizona.  Before the panties of those that happen to live in either of those states get into a bunch, I’m not saying that those are the only states with problems, they do however happen to be the two states that seem to not only be in the news for a lot of violent crimes, the crimes committed are so off the hook it scares me a little.

The Arizona violent crime rate is 10% higher than the national violent crime rate average.  The chances of being the victim of a violent crime in Arizona are 1 in 182. Y’all got hammer killers, knife killers, unsolved strangulation murders, cop murders, a car bomber for insurance. You have Mario Changolla who killed and cut someone into bite sized pieces and of course you have Stabby.

Florida is no better.  Casey Anthony, pig-vomit and George Zimmerman,  Nuff said.

Is it because of the gun laws in these states?  I have no idea.  I do know that I personally won’t be visiting either of them anytime soon and not just because I am an agoraphobic shut it.  My PTSD is not conducive to having a good time when I would curl into a ball and start rocking at the first sound of gunfire.

I realize that violent crime is a problem that is not confined to the US.  We have our very own homegrown nutbags here.  We get to claim Clifford Olson (an oldie, you will have to google him), The Picton Pig Farm murderer, Paul and Karla Bernardo, and now we have Luka Magnotta who killed, cut up, ate, and had sex with the corpse. He also fed a bunch of it to a dog.   Then just for shits and giggles he mailed various body parts to our Prime Minister (it’s kinda like a President, but light………..and more stupid). His trial is coming up soon.  Our constitution does not allow any type of camera’s or still photography in the courtroom, so we get court sketches.  Yup, not kidding, that is still a think here.  Luka Magnotta has pled guilty but not criminally responsible due to mental disease or defect.  Luka Magnotta is about as pure a psychopath as we may ever find next to Ted Bundy (NOT ours) and I hope we get to study him for a long, long time.  We will, because Canada also does not have the death penalty, which makes me sad.  I believe in capital punishment if it is warranted.

What we do have is dangerous offender status.  A panel including the Attorney General, Psychiatrists, Wardens and Superintendents for Corrections Canada and any corrections officers who have had extended contact can convene and assign dangerous offender status to an inmate as in the case of Paul Bernardo and that fucker never gets out.  This is a good thing, because in Canada a life sentence is 25 years.  We don’t have anything higher than that unless you are a dangerous offender.   Our system in my opinion is way more fucked than yours is, but we don’t have anywhere near the violent crime problem that you do.

All has been pretty quiet on the Stabby front today.  Of course things will be back to normal tomorrow when we get to carry on with Jury Selection which is a lot like watching paint dry.

I had to go visit my cardiologist today, which is always a good time.  Getting hooked up with a Holter Monitor next week just to see why my heart keeps beating like the drummer for Metallica has taken up residence in my chest.  I’ve had a couple of cardiac events, just little ones with very little damage to my lion heart, but still it makes a RBMD worry.

All of the dogs continue to be awesome.  Peanut and my Guinea Pig have now made friends which is hilarious if you think about it.  Piggy Friend is not that much smaller than peanut and I think she thinks he’s just a weird looking dog.  Kitty Friend also does not think my GP is a food item since every time I put him out in his pen, the cat jumps in and just hangs out in there with him.  It’s cute, and weird, but what else would you expect around here.

So that’s it for tonight my friends.  I will have a regular blog tomorrow, and again I apologize for tonight.  I just don’t have it in me at the moment.

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10 Responses to A Personal Update and Some Observations

  1. BlueWhiteRed says:

    Mam, I have PTSD from the war(s) and recently sent Dr JDM a thank you note for her concise, layman description of PTSD. IT helped me explain to my tween sons that I’m not a ticking time bomb and to know what to do when mom’s out of town and I wake up “on fire”. I winessed a plane crash and had to debate shooting an enemy burn victim to put him out of his agony. I didn’t. So to hear Dr Fog opine stabby has PTSD IS LUDICROUS. SORRY for all you go through. O know you have seen and experienced many things humans shouldn’t t. I understand that very much. But you survived., as did I. I don’t discount my surviving gifts and talents. I havr a wife who adires the scars, too, and tween sons who don’t tiptoe around me. Please Semper Ad Meliora. We all care.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai BlueWhiteRed Thank you for sharing that with me, and I am sorry that you went through those horrors. You obviously have a lot of inner strength. It is the people around us that suffer because they do not understand, which of course is not their fault. PTSD is difficult to explain, hell it’s difficult to understand how a sound, or a smell, or even seeing something on television can send you right back to that place. And the nightmares. It’s why I don’t sleep. I joke about it, but that’s why I don’t sleep. I know you all care about me, I hope every one knows I care about you all just as much. I just get angry sometimes that after everything that has been taken from me, what is left seems to be chiseled away, a bit at a time. I will be okay by tomorrow. I just have to let it run it’s course. Thank you so much for the kind words, you helped more than you know.

  2. BlueWhiteRed says:

    I’m here.

  3. Joan Soap says:

    Yep, I’ve often wondered about Florida. It seems like it’s inundated with crazies, Pig Vomit being one of the poster girls for Florida Flakes. Sorry to hear about your PTSD. As someone who has also suffered PTSD, I feel for you. No way will I ever believe Stabby has/had it. If you allegedly ‘develop PTSD’ after an exceptionally violent killing that ‘traumatised’ you, you’d run a million miles away from anything that even remotely reminds you of your trauma. You’d avoid guns and knives at all costs, and NO WAY would you ever go on a trip with a bunch of men you barely know, if at all, and arm yourself with a gun and knives, weapons that are supposedly part of your source of trauma.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Joan. Something just ain’t quite right about FL. Stabby has about as much PTSD as my stuffed bear pookie.

  4. Deb says:

    Joan, you totally hit the nail on the head. I know you are a real ‘survivor’.
    BlueWhiteRed, my heart goes out to you and your family.
    Kelly, you are an awesome writer, no matter what you’re writing about. I enjoy reading here daily. Thanks.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Deb. Awwww, Thank you. Sometimes I feel like I’m letting you guys down if I’m not on point. So thanks for that.

  5. limey99 says:

    You are all strong people because you don’t just succumb to the feelings and symptoms that only you can understand. It’s so easy to just curl up into a ball and be a victim to it. Personal experience has given me some insight, but that was years ago and it did take so much time and lots of love to get me back to living again.

    I admire every one of you…and look forward every day to reading this hilarious blog. Such talent.
    Please write a book???

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