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The Stabby Einstein Penalty Phase Retrial- The Erotic Bomb Edition

 

I know you are but what am I? -Arizona

Hai Kids. Hope tonights blog finds everyone well. I DEFINITELY hit a nerve with the last blog, because the mean comments came in fast a furiously. I refuse to post them (for now, I am saving them for a special edition along the lines of Mean Tweets with Jimmy Kimmel) but I won’t give them the satisfaction of seeing them on my blog right now. I guess they don’t know that I have moderation rights. If you don’t agree with something you can say so, just don’t say things like you want to fill me full of your body fluids or things like that. I am a rape survivor and things like that even if I wasn’t are just beneath anyone that wants to hang on to the title of human. Also, just because you brought my IQ into question, it was tested by my psychiatrist and it went off the scale.  Just sayin’.  I have an exceedingly thick skin and most of it I just find hilarious. Hilarious that I am getting so deeply under the skin of the Stabbyites. It fills me full of glee. I have also not been feeling my best for the last 5 days or so, so please bear with me if there are nights I do not blog. I am tired all of the time. I think I may be coming down with a cold or the flu and I feel quite unwell truth be told. I will do my very best, but until the surgery is over I have to consider my health.

We will get into the testimony of yesterday in a moment, but I wanted to bring something to everyone’s attention. Kirk Nurmi has been absolutely adamant that it is us, all of us on social medias well as journalists that are derailing this trial. He brings it up at minimum once a day. While there may be some validity to the way this trial has been sensationalized it does not in any way change the fact that Stabby killed a man by inflicting 27 stab wounds, slashed his throat deep enough to sever his trachea and shot him in the face.  That and the fact that Stabby herself was the one that courted the media leaves me with nothing to say except shut the fuck up already Nurms, it’s getting old.   That said, if he really believes that it is social media that is the problem, why is it that Cha Cha Delarosa, Mitigation specialist/dance instructor is one of the loudest, angriest voices on social media. I have reams of tweets that were written by her. She is constantly attacking anyone who hasn’t sipped the Kool-aid. Maybe Juan should bring this up in court. Actually, once I am done here I think I will send him off an email. He doesn’t use social media so it might not cross his mind that the entire defense team does. Things to ponder.

Because we all know that I don’t ever do anything without proof I present exhibit A.

Please Take note that in this first Screen Shot Cha Cha makes it perfectly clear that she does indeed work on the case.

ChaCha important

In this second post we see that Cha Cha gets her back up very easily when it is pointed out that a woman waaaaaay past her prime anyway managed to spell out cougarloucious instead of cougarlicious which was the intent.  Apparently Cha Cha has a way overinflated sense of self.  Wait…This is starting to sound vaguely familiar.

chacha1

In post 3 we see that Cha Cha cannot take any type of criticism.

ChaCha3

Post 4 is interesting.

ChaCha4

Post 5 shows that Cha Cha seems to be very thin skinned and combative.

ChaCha6

chacha 5

Post 7 speaks volumes doesn’t it.

chacha7
People that go to Walmart are also on the radar of her ire.  She seems to hate anyone who doesn’t support her views on things.

chacha8

Another seemingly combative tweet.

chacha9

I would love to tell her that we intelligent people are winning but of course as public enemy number 1, I am blocked from her twitter.

chacha10

She really has a thing for the less intelligent doesn’t she?

Now, this is not just some nobody that has no dog in this fight.  This is Stabby’s mitigation specialist who is privy to all kinds of sensitive information regarding the goings on of the trial.  She works for the defense team obviously.  You know, the ones who are on a daily basis bitching about social media and how it is derailing the trial.  Seems to me that Nurmi should maybe get a leash on his Mitigation specialist.  Like yesterday. It’s not people who have no bearing on this case you need to be worried about Alfred E.  It’s the people in your own camp that for whatever reason are also reaching for that 15 minutes of fame and boatloads of that murder money.

So, Stabby and the never ending trial.  As is usual court started late. We finally know why though. It is Stabby’s daily cavity search that some poor bastard has to perform.  Today they found One Whole Brown Sugar Cured Ham, 3 Christmas cd’s, a box of Frosted Flakes, and magazines in a folder marked Legal.   Jenny from the Cell Block arrived lugging to large bags and immediate began talking with Alfred E and ChaCha.

Defense then got up and left the courtroom.  Someone may have yelled free weed and we just didn’t hear it, or someone was offering really gaudy clothing from 1980 and they were trying to stop ChaCha from getting out there. As soon as everyone was back in the courtroom, Sometimes Judge Stephens called everyone up to the bench.  Sidebar is over in record time and Great Nana Dr. Sexpert was once again on the stand for more of the never ending re-direct.

Alfred E doesn’t even get a chance to get the entire first question out of his mouth before a madder than he has ever been in the history of ever Juan has objected and brings us to sidebar number 2.  Sidebar number 2 is over and Alfred E tries again.  Are you here in any way to say Travis was a horrible monstrous person? Dr. Sexpert says no which pretty much throws the pedophile accusations directly out the window.  Stabby must be thrilled.   Nurms keeps going.  Are you hear to say Travis got what he deserved? Juan snarls and exception and we have sidebar number 3.  Back from sidebar Alfred E is trying to have a new exhibit introduced and of course the completely rabid pitbull objects and you guessed it we are now on number 4. Back from sidebar the exhibit is admitted and Nurms asks Great Nana Dr. Sexpert about it.  Over the long weekend the 5 hour rant that was really a two hour conversation has now magically turned into a 6 hour rant. My head hurts already.  BRB gotta take a Tylenol.   Sidebar number 5 is called and the sometimes Judge mercifully calls a 10 minute recess.

After the break that we all wished would last till the old bat died of old age, Nurmi has great Nana Dr. Sexpert start reading text messages.  Dr. Sexpert is using the text messages to turn the 2 hour conversation into a six hour rant.  Juans objections are flying like machine gun bullets as Nurmi gets Great Nana to go over the exact same thing that she has been going over for the last billion days.  If you hear the same lies over and over again they will somehow magically become truths.  Aaaaaand suffering in silence just once again reared its ugly head except now they were both suffering in silence.  Dr. Sexpert says that most children do not call their parents by their first names to which I say “unless even as a kid you don’t think the rules apply to you.”

Dr. Sexpert has now taken it upon herself to become Stabby’s cheerleader and tries to remind the jury of the non existent physical abuse that poor Stabby suffered at the hands of her parents.  For the billionth time she states that she is not there to diagnose or treat anyone while she continues to diagnose EVERYONE.

Juan is back up and the vet took one look and peaced the fuck out.  We have a loose Juan with no dart in him.  This may not turn out well.   Juan is now having Great Nana Dr. Sexpert read some emails that Nurmi must have missed, because he wouldn’t leave out anything that might paint Travis in a good light on purpose…Bwahahahahahahahahahaha

The more into it they get the more defensive Dr. Sexpert is becoming.  She is very confused as to times and what she said and didn’t say and of course she is blaming the state saying that they are misrepresenting her earlier testimony. It is in regards to her statement about the five hour rant that was a 2 hour text conversation that is now a 6 hour rant that she says she never said.  Now she says that it has been taken out of context.   With that the pitbull leaves Dr. Sexpert to pick her entrails up off the floor and try and put them back.  And it’s lunch.

Court has reconvened and the Juror Questions are up.  The first question was “was the sex with Miss Reid the same as the sex with Stabby.  Dr. Sexpert says no, the sex with Stabby was more exploratory.  The  Jury then asks if Chris and Sky Hughes’ opinions could have changed between the time they wrote the email & the death.  Dr. Sexpert conceded that it was likely.  The Jury asks a couple more questions and Alfred E. is back up.

Dr. F explains that  Stabby and Travis’ relationship was “more sexually involved” than Reid’s. You know because Deanna was a nice girl who had problems with sticking food items in her cooch and taking it up the ass on a regular basis.  Dr. Sexpert  calls it an Erotic Bomb.  She then said that Deanna did not want to continue a sexual relationship unless they were going to get married.

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72 Responses to The Stabby Einstein Penalty Phase Retrial- The Erotic Bomb Edition

  1. Katie says:

    Cougarloucous-or however she spelled it? Stupid bitch can’t even spell! And love how the social media ban doesn’t apply to her! Thanks Kelly-love your posts-feel better!

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Katie. No, she can’t but everyone that doesn’t support Stabby is an idiot. Thank you so much for the kind words and I promise I will do my best to get well sooner rather than later.

  2. achmelvichcastle says:

    best blog to date!!! Will donate next paycheck

  3. tammy says:

    I’m sorry Precious Kelly but Piggly Wiggly would not have that piece of s—.She is toast, well done. Wait till Jaun gets to closing, remember how he called latoilet everything but white. She knew just what to say at all times, they had her primed didn’t they. I could hardly go to bed last nite waiting to hear you tell about this day in court. I knew if you were alive this was going to be good and good it was. Anyone could tell this story but no one can tell it like you! My blood pressure was out of sight, I could of walked all the way to AZ to take her out all by myself. How can a woman of her age do what she did in that courtroom? She is ready to meet her maker and there are alot of ppl that would love to help her get there…That old piece of trash gave a great performance, but my money is still on Jaun and Dr DeMarte. I put a card in the mail for you today, I also put a little money and money for my cups. So please take care of yourself and rest for your surgery and know we care deeply!
    You keep us going!!!!!!!

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Tammy. LMAO. Okay maybe she can get a job with the department of sanitation. Juan was so furious I am betting that he rips her to shreds. Absolute shreds. I guess it really is true that people will do anything for money. Even sell their own souls. It’s almost sad. If it wasn’t so infuriating it would be sad. Aww that was so sweet Tammy. Thank you so much for thinking of me. You all keep me going too. I hope that you know that.

  4. Kelly, Kelly…you are killing me! I don’t need this laughing so hard since I’m still trying to get over this perpetual, nagging cough that I have nicknamed my own personal ‘Dr. Dementia’, who you know as “Great Nana Dr Sexpert”. Like her, I can’t get rid of this cough. I did see my doctor a couple of days ago though and now on some meds. So maybe soon I’ll know I’m going to live, after all. That is, if you stop making me laugh so hard!

    I spewed hot tea on my keyboard when I read your near-the-finish-line. This:

    “Juan is so pissed off it is beyond definition. Great Nana Dr. Sexpert was smirking. And then she did it. She did the one thing you never, ever, ever do in a courtroom I don’t care if it’s not a Judge, a sometimes Judge or a real live Judge. The crazy bitch yelled at sometimes Judge Stephens telling her Juan is mischaracterizing her testimony. Sometimes Judge Stephens DEFINITELY resides on the island of NOT THE ONE and promptly laid a bitch slap down on Great Nana Dr. Sexpert. Nurmi asks if they can approach and Sometimes Judge Stephens who was still the color of eggplant(apparently this is a vegetable, I always thought it was just a color)said not on your fucking life. Juan now wants to know how many times Travis’ penis was inside of the gaping opening to hell. She threw her arms in the air and barked “I wasn’t there.” Sometimes Judge Stephens who is still visibly pissed has had enough and marches the entire bunch of them back her chambers. They came back and Juror 3 got kicked. Nobody knows why.”

    Brilliant! Please feel better soon, Kelly. I’m praying for you. I promise.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Judy. You spewed so YAY!! I promise, as soon as this surgery is done I am going to be perfect. Thank you so much for thinking of me. see you tomorrow. Have a great night.

  5. Anne Wyatt says:

    Awesome! Thanks

  6. I actually gave up following this trial because I’m so sick of Nurmi’s behavior and that Dr. Nana’s testimony. The only time I find out anything now is reading your blogs and I’m so glad I do.
    Your characterization of the cavity search almost made me snort milk out through my nose (in the future I’ll have to be more careful about what I’m ingesting when I read your blog).
    I still think you’re the best writer out there and DEFINITELY the BEST blogger anywhere.
    If I had any money at all (I’m disabled and can’t even live on what I get) I’d definitely be sending you some to keep this blog going.

    I hope your health improves…keeping you in my prayers.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Starshine. Thank you so much, it does me wonders to be able to make people laugh. Sweetie, I am in the same boat as you re disability, which is why I am having such a hard time so I totally understand. Please don’t even think about it. Once my heart gets fixed I am going to be in perfect health I promise. Have a great night sweetie.

  7. Mama Via says:

    I THOUGHT I updated y’all about my eyes…but either I didn’t, or I can’t see it…doc is giving me a choice between removing just the cataracts…or doing cataracts and cornea transplants at the same time…he says it’s about 50/50 that I’ll have to do corneas in next 10 years…probabilities for needing transplant rise with my age…I COULD live to be 70…or 95…who the fuck knows?…son says do it all now…younger is healthier for recovery…DH says “do what you think is best”…I just don’t know…eyes are bothering me…going to bed…love to all. Mama

    Reply

    Great blog, miss k!

  8. You are the best, Kelley. I had not read this many of Cha Cha’s tweet before this selection that you have provided here. What the fucking hell? What sort of professional does this in their spare time? That is crazy! I wonder if JA knew how her mitigation gal conducted herself on the Internet that *her* crazy ass might even be P.O.’d. Every single member of her team continues to push her closer to the death penalty as we watch. Her death cannot happen soon enough.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Ann. Thank you so much. Exactly. What type of professional. And then the defense has the unmitigated gall to complain about social media. Eat a dick Nurmi. Have a great night Ann.

  9. Laura hickey says:

    Thanks for yet another great blog!! Seriously, how do you do that when you’re feeling like crap??!! Hope you feel better VERY soon. Take care.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Laura: You are so welcome. I do it because it honestly makes me feel good when I know I am making all of your days a bit brighter. I am going to be all kinds of better once this surgery is done. Take care and have a great night.

  10. NancyB says:

    Finally I’m able to find a totally accurate rundown of all that transpired. Most excellent! And feel better.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Nancy. Welcome to the comment section. Thank you so much for the kind words. Have a great night.

  11. Kelly… Thanks for the laughs! You are the best blogger out there! You out did yourself this time. Your comment about JA’s cavity search had me rolling. I think you forgot the leftover tootsie pops & pop rocks though! You know Stabby has an endless supply stored up there. I don’t think I’ll be eating Frosted Flakes anytime soon. Lol. As to Dr. Sexpert she is the most disgusting, unprofessional witness we’ve seen yet. She really made herself look like a dumb ass not answering Juan’s questions. For her and Nurmi to make fun of Juan’s questioning of her was uncouth and I’m surprised the sometimes judge didn’t tell her STFU.
    Hope you are feeling better, get some rest and know we will wait patiently for your next blog. Your health comes first! 🙂

  12. Terry says:

    My first time reading your blog. Love the no holds bar on the goings on in court. You nailed it. Sorry to read you have a heart problem. Mother had a double with valve replacement at the age of 80 and she is 83 now, working full time and doing fine. Keep your chin up, make sure you have that heart shape pillow with you always after the surgery.

    God Bless.

    And what do you expect so called professionals to act like, anyone that would take on her case are just like 3holewonder.

  13. Laura hickey says:

    What I don’t understand is why nurmi didn’t prepare dr f better for her testimony, i.e., CROSS!! I mean, he knew what JUAN did to alyce. Maybe he tried … ???

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Laura: This bat is so full of herself she watched youtube and thought she was prepared. This one isn’t on Nurms, much as I would like it to be.

      • Laura hickey says:

        I’m sure you’re right. I’m pretty sure I’d wither and melt under cross from Juan, so I get it, but she’s so very unprofessional.

      • reallybigmeandog says:

        Hai Laura: completely 1oo percent unprofessional.

  14. Jodi J. says:

    Kelly, your posts just keep getting better and better. Of course, the defense just keeps getting stupider and stupider so you have plenty of material. I can’t believe the good (snort) “Dr” went after the judge! I knew she was refusing to answer simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers but…WOW! I was SO pissed off at the non-answers that I was afraid to check my blood pressure. If I was Juan, I would’ve walked up to the stand and cold-cocked “Dr” F. I do hope you can get word to Juan about Cha Cha’s Twitter musings. Even the defense team, not just JA, thinks they can do anything they damn well please. Hopefully Stevens bitchslaps Cha Cha for that.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Jodi: Thank you so much. Honestly, I don’t think that Alfred E. is a stupid man. I think he is working with a client that is determined she is smarter than he is and it is tying his hands behind his back. I have days when I feel really bad for Nurmi. Of course I also take psychotropic drugs so it kind of depends on the day. I swear I though Sometimes Judge Stephens was gonna cut a bitch she was so mad. I actually put a Skype into Jauns office this morning. They told me to call back at 5pm AZ time so I will keep you abridged. This ChaCha thing really does toss the whole social media argument right out the window and I think he needs to know. Not the first info I have forwarded to the office although whether anything comes of it or not is anyones guess. My lawyer says I am completely within the law to do so and I choose to do so.

  15. LindaNewYork says:

    You seriously make me LaughOutLoud every time!

    But no mention of the “incest” Nana alluded to??

    Feel better, Kelly!

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Linda: YAY!! Nope, not going there. Thanks. Once my surgery is done, I am sure I will be fine.

  16. peony2 says:

    Honestly this is just getting more and more absurd by the day – what happened to the old adage “keep it simple stupid?” The old hag Jodi Arias slit and shot her former boyfriends throat and took his life in the most evil manner and there is not much more to say about it except = fry her –
    Sympathy, empathy and remorse have left the court room years ago – this dance with the devil is getting past the point of being amusing – could we please turn up the heat on the boiler and get this job done?
    There is NO excuse left to put forward in any manner – no Ifs or Buts to be put forward – the she devil is a killer – plain and simple – For the sake of all that is decent and for the taxpayers of Arizona – let this bickering go – let her get on with the choices she had made in life and PAY THE PRICE FOR MURDERING TRAVIS!

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Peony, how you been? Yes, yes it is. Stabby really is not aging well is she? At this point all she is doing to put it in the words of my ever so astute lawyer is buy the sympathy vote of one Juror. That is all she needs and not to break any hearts but James thinks she has done so. We actually have a bet. If he is right I have to cook him a steak dinner and make him a cheesecake that says you were right, I was wrong in gel icing. Have a great day.

  17. Adele says:

    Oh,oh,oh. Kel..I feel special. I made your big board! Didn’t even notice that ChaCha replied to my tweet. 😇
    As always, a great read, filled with facts, humour and a little on the side..keep it up.
    Hope u feel better soon 😚

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Adele: YAY!! You have been recognized by your queen. I see a damehood in your future. Thanks so much for the kind words and I promise I will feel better soon.

  18. Arizona Rose says:

    I swear you get funnier with every post! Your description of Stabby’s cavity search is hilarious! As for Dr Dinosaur, I was as surprised at learning that the chance to have an orgasm is “very powerful” as I would’ve been had you slapped me with a smelly Florida flounder. I wonder if Dr Dino would think the same if an orgasm, or the thought thereof, happened after 11pm? Cuz that would make it kinky sex, right?

    I’m sorry you’re on the receiving end of such vileness from Stabbyites. We’ve seen the type of person who supports her, and that just confirms it. On the other hand, their neanderthal reaction proves that the truth you speak is getting to them.

    Feel better soon, Kelly.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Rose: Thank you. I can’t take credit for the cavity search. It was pencils idea and because I have eightybajillion things on my mind I forgot to credit Pencil. I will go edit that as soon as I am done here. We are going to do a daily one, because pencil is at least as funny as I am. As for the vileness. It speaks to the mindset of these people, and the fact that me, Queen Kelly of the region of Mean, law professor and dean of fuckery has become Stabby nemesis number one fills me with the will to live forever. I think it is funny, so try not to take offense. I am going to post them all at one time, maybe an oh holy night special Christmas edition. I am definitely getting to them. And all I have to say about that is YAY!! Thanks for reading. Hope you have a great day.

  19. Lori g says:

    Hi Kelley- first time I’ve commented on here. First off , hope you’re feeling better. I read your blog all of the time and you are so funny and on point that I don’t have any clean sweaters from laughing so hard and spitting coffee. I am a true trial junkie and have never seen anything like this. Nurmie and his sidekicks have really hit new lows. I am extremely concerned about the jury questions for the ancient, slime ball, alleged sexpert. They seemed to focus on Travis and not in a good way. I feel like her rudeness toward Juan and the lies she told are going to keep the disgusting “it” off death row. I’m sure Juan has a master plan and his witnesses will blow sexpert out of the water, but for now I’m concerned. Any thoughts on the questions? Lastly I thank you for calling Juan a pitbull. They are amazing dogs and have a protective side like no other dogs. Juan is a true representative of there breed.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Lori. Welcome to the comment section. We are all very nice here. YAY. I have to tell you. I have been studying true crime since I was a small child and this right here, it is the most out of control trial I have ever witnessed, read, etc. I had a pitbull 14 years ago and he reminds me of Juan which is why the name stuck. Juan will in my mind forever be a little pitbull.

  20. Lori g says:

    Oops I should have said “their”. I’m embarrassed

  21. Owlie says:

    I scared my cat by laughing so loudly at the sticking food in her cooch. lmao! thank you thank you thank you for giving this fucking mess an injection of humor!

  22. Tyla says:

    Great blog, again Kelly. Someone needs to tell ChaCha it’s NOT a sixth sense seeing stupid people, it’s called a “reflection” when looking in the mirror! My God ChaCha is beyond looking stupid, every time she post something she looks like a fucking fool, just like nurmi does every time he ask a question – not a very bright defense team!

    When I read that Dr F went after Jss I almost pissed my pants, although my thought was …. this judge stands up for herself BUT does NOT stand up for JUSTICE and fairness for Travis!! This entire trial makes me want to vomit – it will be in future Law books as the dumbest, unconstitutional, train wreck of a trial and will point out all the things NOT to do when you become a judge!!! AZ’s Montgomery needs to hang his head in shame for allowing this joke of a trial to continue at the taxpayers expense!

    Feel better Kelly and when you get the price for the mugs please let me know and I will send $$$ immediately.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Tyla: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I wish I had thought of that. I agree with what you said re not standing up for justice, but after yesterday I think Nurmi’s team is in a whole different coliseum than the one they were in previously. Stephens was/is/probably always will be PISSED!! I mean turn purple don’t even know exactly what you want to peg at someones head pissed.

  23. pinkpumps25 says:

    Love it again! Maria should have been fired a long time ago. Oh and the Jodi trolls are from JAII. They can’t handle the truth. Post their IP location. They hate that. It’s like throwing holy water on them.

  24. KarlaMNL says:

    Brilliant. Just Brilliant I look forward to reading your unique take on this nightmare retrial The”good”doctor” was shown to be nothing more than a duhfense hack Anyone else think she resembles Ruth Buzzi? Only thing missing was her whacking Juan with her Ole lady purse lol I just wish this Judge would say NO to Nurberts incessant side bars more often maybe if she did SkankenEinstien would already be in PERRYVILLE but I can wait Just as long as we get to see ITS face when FINALLY sentenced Keep up the good work your majesty your faithfull followers anxiously awaiting your next blog luv ya

  25. HarleyGirl says:

    I believe Dr. Fuck is dating SLV. She is obviously man hater and a smart ass. i believe Juan gave her enough rope to hang herself. I hope the bitch dies of a heart attack on the way home. she can suck a dick.
    Kelly, I am sorry you feel so bad. Please just don’t blog if you feel that bad. Love you,Girl!

  26. kathy says:

    Damn it hell, just ate a chocolate croissant and have chocolate all over my hands. my husband will kill me I am on his computer. Oh, shit…ALV or Dr. MoFU will read this take it out of contexts and than accuse JM of mis whatever she will say at his trial.Anyway, I want a cup you decide I will go with the rest I can’t make up my mind. Oh, wait I live in Dallas not AZ where we know how to hold trials fast so I will take the Fuckery one. Thanks.

  27. hbbeachbun says:

    Brilliant work, Kelly. You nailed it once again. Take care of yourself and hope you get better soon.

  28. BlueWhiteRed says:

    Applauds, applauds from Hooterville! I love that you post at my bedtime and I keep checking like a kid sneaking a comic book! Bravo Pencil & Kels on the Cavity Search….laugh myself to sleep. Best meds.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Blue: Thank you so much. I have my Skype set up for you now so we can Skype tomorrow if you are around.

      • BlueWhiteRed says:

        YES, finally alone all day while kiddos at school. I’ll log in at 11:00am ET, and work on stuff til about 1530, kay? Tonite would be ok from about 9pm-11pm. Can’t wait!

      • reallybigmeandog says:

        Blue: Can’t wait.

  29. Connie Rust says:

    Good one Kelly. I’ve been trying for 3 days now to get a white chocolate mocha from McDonalds and those morons can’t get it right. ChaCha can go work there. They hire people with single digit IQ’s. Piggly wiggly can be spared.

  30. karen30036 says:

    I keep checking like a kid sneaking a comic book …. exactly what I do too! Kelly makes my day every day.This was especially funny and the cavity search? I fell out.
    Thinking of you Kelly, please take care. I think I can safely say we ALL love you and want you well.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Karen: Thank you. Tonight that is what I am doing. I have not felt “right” all day, although what it is I cannot put my finger on, so porngate will have to wait till tomorrow. Much love.

  31. TisMe says:

    Love your blog, funny as always. Omg the cavity search was hilarious ! Cha Cha unprofessional as ever I see, isn’t it lovely that anyone who appears to disagree with stalking,murder and false pedo claims is dumbass and visits Walmart, which judging by her wardrobe choices she does a lot of ! She really is a piece of work isn’t she, no wonder her very best friend in the world is a lying, murdering, scumbag crim. As for Dr. Dinosaur she doesn’t seem to give a flying crap about anything but sticking it to Juan and of course her paycheck….hmmm sounds familiar Alyce Laviolette. Thanks for making me laugh and I really hope you don’t feel icky for too long.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai TisMe: Thank you so much. The cavity search is from Stabby’s Pencil. She does one everyday and gave me permission to post it here because it is funny. Just goes to show the caliber of mitigation/dance instructor we are working with here. I’m glad I made you laugh and I will be hella happy when I feel better too.

  32. TisMe says:

    Just one more thing while we’re on the topic of tweets…..this would have to be the most unintentionally funniest tweet I’ve seen…ever!

    “@jodiarias_gb: @jeffgoldesq Jodi shouyld be home before Christmas if the judge would do what is RIGHT. Throw the case out, Jodi should sue for $millions.”

    All these years I’ve worked my ass off to earn a living when all I had to do to become a millionaire was murder someone ! Why didn’t someone tell me this !

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Like I keep saying “get that murder money bitch.” This murder has become big business for the whole damn family plus Jason weber plus lisa schilling plus ben earnst and I could go on and on and on. It is a travesty.

  33. Gwen Bazzrea says:

    Hey from Virginia. So glad I found your blog yesterday. I’ve got the damn flu and have been up most of the night. Thanks for keeping me occupied with your posts. Just a question for the Dean: does your institute bestow the degree of “Dr. Sexpert?” I’ve taught sex ed, grown two whole children, and occasionally say dirty things to my husband. My mother in law is called “Nana” , so I’m guessing I could be Dr. Momma Sexpert.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Gwen: I’m glad you found my blog too. Well, if you agree to lie in court for the defense I could indeed bestow a degree of sexpert. Think about it.

      • Gwen Bazzrea says:

        I’ll testify for Juan. “Yes, folks, the defendant is absolutely a sex-crazed looney stalker delusional murderous lying ho-bag.” Ho-bag is a technical, diagnostic term we sexperts like to toss around.

  34. BlueWhiteRed says:

    Hey TisMe, my slightly different version is: “Stabby finally has men spending millions on her….” (Men= taxpayers of AZ, that is. )

  35. sdrawkcaB says:

    Hai and good morning, Kelly!

    Another brilliant and LOL witty blog; thank you for your regular injection of humor and insight into this most F’d up trial ever! I thoroughly enjoy my daily visits here to read your humorous commentary, and for that I thank you and bow down to you, our most exalted, beloved, and revered Law Professor and Dean of Fuckery. All kidding aside, I thoroughly enjoy your blog and I’m sending healing thoughts and prayers your way that you’re back to full energy and good health soon.

    As for ChaCha –
    I never checked out her twitter account because I’d heard enough about her that I didn’t want to waste my time or raise my blood pressure, but… I just had to take a peek after your blog today. What a surprise. Not. She’s changed (I don’t know when) her account to reflect a different spelling. LOL
    She’s now going by “cougarluscious ” rather than “Cougarloucous”, Do you think Stabby helped her with the spelling this time?

    Take care!

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai sdrawkcaB: Backwards? Good morning. YAY!! I am glad that I can throw some levity onto this heaping pile that is the stabby arias penalty phase retrial. Yeah she changed it right after the last blog. Is it still on lockdown. I really am public enemy number one lol. Thanks for reading.

  36. Pasha says:

    OMGosh! I am so glad I have not let every man who ever looked at me bang me up the anal cavity like Hodi or else my bowels would be so loose that I would be crapping myself from laughing so hard. HA HA HA. I love your blogs.

    I am sorry you are not feeling well. Healing prayers that you get better soon, Kelly.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Pasha. I think I speak for all of us when I say we are all glad. Thanks so much. I will be all better soon. More bionic parts. YAY!!

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