To The People Stalking My Son

March 30, 2015

You know who you are so for right now I’m going to leave it at that. Just because you have me personally blocked on twitter doesn’t mean that I’m not getting screen shots everyday of the stuff you are saying about me. I didn’t care. I have not retaliated and for the last time I have no control over what people other than myself do or say. I am not encouraging it. I have tried to diffuse it.

Now you have brought my son into it. And you are stalking his facebook. The Smudger Leeds that you have taken the facebook profile picture of is a very young girl and I’m thinking that has to somehow be illegal.

I just want you to be aware that I am aware and if the harassment of my child continues I am going to be contacting the authorities, the press and whoever else I can think of to expose this. Bullying a grown woman is one thing, bullying an already psychologically damaged child is entirely another so stop.

I remember one of you three crying foul when a picture of a group of students was posted. How foul is this? And no that person is not the one who did this, one of her lackies did it for her.

Also, as for all this everybody is Kelly bullshit. I have one ID on twitter. RBMD. If I have something to say I don’t need to hide behind a fake name to say it. But way to be paranoid. Continue to believe what you want.

Leave my son and his friends alone.

Guys, We Need To Talk About Twitter

March 26, 2015

Hai Everybody.

I’m going to make as short as possible. First I want you to know that I appreciate what you are trying to do. I really do. That being said, the stuff on twitter, it needs to stop. Now, obviously I can’t make any of you do anything. I’d just like to point out a couple of things. The more this gets carried on (and that includes by me) the worse it is getting. Peoples accounts are getting suspended, people are being goaded into fights, people that I care about are being called names and being accused of being me people that have been friends for years are being made to pick sides.

I will say again, there is more to life than this one trial. If anyone here knew either Jodi or Travis please raise your hand. I did not. I was disgusted by the carnage and the changing stories and the courting of the media and the snuffing out of a person because the other person was butthurt. I never knew Travis. I do know that this trial has done one of two things. It has brought out either the very worst or the very best in people. We are good people here. And of course we are offended and angry at a lot of the things on twitter, but the easiest way to make that stop is to ignore it. I am. I check twitter once a day now and I almost never comment. That is me and it does not in any way have to be you but please at least think about what I am saying.

It’s time everybody just let it go okay. Let the chips fall where they may. Enough vitriol. It isn’t healthy and it isn’t getting anyone anywhere. I’m asking you to please stop. If you are mad stop going to the place that makes you mad. I know that the anger is multi layered. I know that it is deep. But anger just breeds anger and I want this place to be a good place always.

I will no longer be discussing anything to do with the place that upsets us. AT ALL. If you are fighting for me, please stop. If you have your own issues then let your conscience be your guide.

I love this place. I want it to always be our ‘no kill shelter’ where all are welcome and all their thoughts are welcomed as long as they are presented in a respectful manner.

I guess that is it. It just makes me sad the amount of energy being wasted being pissed off.

I love you all. I will be blogging Durst tomorrow and hopefully I can find out what the Italian had to say about Foxy Knoxy and if it made a difference

RBMD peacing the fuck out.

Knox Decision Delayed And Apparently The Arraignment Judge Concurs With My Assessment of Robert Durst

March 25, 2015

Wow the wheels of Justice grind very slowly

So the decision on whether or not Amanda Knox’s conviction is being upheld has been put off so that her former partner in crime can try and throw her under the bus and save his own ass on Friday. His defense team wants to be heard before the court makes a decision on whether Amanda better start trying to make her way to a non-extradition country or not.

Robert Durst was denied bail of even 1 billion dollars in court the other day. Apparently the court agrees that Crazy Assed Crazy is indeed just that as well as maybe a tiny bit of a flight risk. Tons is coming in on Durst so there will be updates on this one soon. There are rumors of more bodies on this guy everyday and I also read that a judge thinks he mailed her a cats head. Talks are ongoing with his wife to secure a deal for her testimony so they probably have something on her too besides accessory after the fact. Can’t wait. Charming fellow this guy.

See you all tomorrow or Friday

RBMD peacing the fuck out.

Robert Durst Is a Crazy Assed Crazy.

March 21, 2015

Really dude, you didn’t remember you had a mic on? Whatever the fuck planet he’s from

Hai everybody. It’s me your Dean of Fuckery/Law Professor/doctor of doctoring/resident sarcasm expert and queen of all I survey. I have been looking into this Robert Durst dude and I have to say the psychopaths seem to be coming out of the woodwork just to say hi. This one is pure psychopath. It’s a lot like finding bigfoot. On a scale of 1 to 10 buddy has got to be a 15. Seriously, you have three bodies behind you, that you got away with and you decide to do a documentary on yourself. Delusions of grandiosity much?

So here is some background on Robert Durst. He is rich as fuck, grew up in New York, he got counceling as a child for “sibling rivalry” or maybe for killing cats who keeps track? He became a real estate developer but when daddy handed the reins over to his brother it caused a giant shit show in the family and Robert took his ball out of the sandbox and went somewhere else to play.

He married Kathleen McCormick in 1973 and she magically disappeared in 1982. (I didn’t do it, I only disappear planes.) At the time she went missing Durst was living in a separate apartment and dating some other woman. Apparently the police didn’t look to hard for Kathleen. They reopened an investigation in 2000. Want to know why? Because Durst’s good friend Susan Berman was killed execution style in her house in California. Coincidentally(spoiler, not really) she was thought to have information on the disappearance of Kathleen. When questioned Durst confirmed he had recently sent his good friend $50000 for no apparent reason and promptly booked it for Texas. And just because all this isn’t way to fishy he lived in a boarding house posing as a mute woman. (Okay I know I saw this on law and order. BRB.) Yup I was right. Season 14 Episode 17 called hands free.

Anyway in 2001 Durst was arrested when his neighbor turned up dead and disassembled. The parts were found floating in Galveston Bay. He posted bail of 300 grand and immediately jumped it. He was recaptured in Pennsylvania trying to shoplift a chicken salad Sammy. He had $500 in his pocket and when his car was searched they found $37000 in cash, a couple of guns, some weed, and the dead dudes drivers license.

In 2003 he was put on trial for that murder and claimed self defense. He hired Dick Diguerin (very hot shit defense attorney, if you are really rich and killed somebody use this guy) During cross-examination, Durst admitted to using a paring knife, two saws, and an axe to hunk up Mr. Black for easier disposal. He was acquitted of murder. He was sentenced to bail jumping and tampering with evidence and got 5yrs. He was released twice. The first time he was caught breaking his parole conditions so they shipped him back to do his remaining time. He was released in 2006.

This brings us to now when the dumbass agreed to the documentary The Jinx. Where he forgot he was wearing a live mic and confessed to murder. Or did he? I won’t say what I think he is going to say about that but I don’t think it is going to stand in court.

He was arrested recently and charged with murder and was caught with a shit ton of cash and a latex mask for disguise purposes. They also found a .38 loaded with 4 rounds, a bunch more weed and paperwork for shipments of large sums of cash. Dick DiGuerin is once again representing him and he has waived an extradition hearing and was going to be being shipped back to answer his murder charges. However, New Orleans filed its own charges for the firearm and the weed so that could slow his return to Cali.

This one is going to be a barn burner.

That’s it for today
RBMD Peacing the fuck out.

EDIT: I put the sum of $15000 that he sent to his friend it was actually $50000. It has been corrected (and thank you to the person who’s name I cannot remember I’m sorry) for pointing it out.

Updates and Stuff

March 20, 2015

Sorry guys, someone who was a hugely important part of my life before my brain flipped and I became a hermit lost her dad last night.  So instead of worrying about the blog today I am standing by Skype and facebook in case she needs to talk.  I can’t go there because even if it was just her I would have to heavily medicate myself which would not be much help and her whole family is there making me visiting impossible.  She understands and so does her family but I feel like a completely horrible person about it anyway.

Broyhill in the shortest trial ever was convicted on all counts.  He got life +19 to 25.  I’d like to point out that that is how you expediently run a trial and other than the one little fuckup by totally a Judge calling the defense attorney Mr. Argument during closing it was a very tight trial. Boring as fuck but tight.

Hernandez is ongoing and what a shit show that is.  Might break in on that one if nothing else is jumping.

Anyway, I’m around but I have to be available for my friend.   So for anyone who hasn’t seen this Just skip ahead to 44:32 for the pertinent parts.

Hope everyone is well and I do apologize my plans for today’s blog will have to wait till tomorrow.

RBMD Peacing the fuck out.

EDIT: This is getting stupid now. I went to see what Sandra webber had written on her blog and she said someone who I did not believe to be Juans tie was Juans tie and the girl was being harassed so I told her I thought she was wrong. So now apparently I’m not Sandra but we are best friends. FUUUUUCK.

While I Sit Back And Await A Credible Source

March 17, 2015

My goodness things have been happening in Stabby land haven’t they.  It was “reported” that Stabby freaked out and had to be four point restrained (turned out that one wasn’t actually exactly true), Stabby  has had her privileges taken away which is totally true because Sheriff Joe said so, issued a press release and ACTUAL press reported on it.  Stabby is now trying to have her sentencing moved up, Stabby is trying to have her sentencing moved back.  You get the picture.

Now, Stabby’s good buddy ChaCha has allegedly had her name found on 14-(fourteen) bank accounts belonging to Stabby in her attempts to hide money and a hundred billion people are in all kinds of trouble with the IRS.  I’m sure by tomorrow I will be all of them.  Want to know what is funny about todays BOMBSHELL news.  The lack of  the reporting of it by one single credible news source anywhere.  Does anyone besides me find that odd?    Actually News outlets have been breaking their necks in an effort to make sure that everybody knows where it came from but nobody is looking into it.

I don’t know about you all, but I’m going to make some popcorn.

What do you think?

RBMD peacing the fuck out.

EDIT:  Well, I moved that fucking plane again (renae, you may want to stay out of your backyard) took my computer tower hauling cable traintrack walk, was everybody on the internet for a couple of minutes each, made my way around the entire world and now I’m back aaaaaaand I’m still waiting.  Just sayin.  Oh yeah and I’m out of popcorn so eversnark you’re up.

Also, I want to remind everyone that we are a civilized people here.  Play nice with the trolls.

EDIT of EDIT   cricket

The Jonathan Broyhill Trial

March 12, 2015

North Carolina has wackadoo’s too.  Who knew?

Well Hello everyone.  Mama Via is doing fine and I’m hoping Connie had a great birthday.  So, Jon Broyhill who we will now just refer to as the pedoface for brevities sake is a big fat loser.  He kind of looks like a cross between uncle fester and maybe some guy that offers free kittens out of the back of a blacked out van. He is charged with murder first degree and attempt murder first degree.

pedoface1Pedoface.  Tell me I’m wrong.

Just to catch everyone up pedoface is accused of hacking to death the wife of his best friend in what can only be described as Stabby style (well, minus the shower and washing machine) and then attacking his best friend with the same knife that had his wife’s blood all over it.   Jamie Hahn was an up and comer in the political arena and Nation Hahn was her husband.

Pedoface was the best man at Jamie and Nations wedding.  He was present in the house the evening of the attack.  He was seen violently stabbing Jamie by Nation.  Nation came to his wife’s aid and told her to get out of the house.  She made it as far as her neighbors yard before her grievous injuries dropped her.   She was alive when the ambulance got to her but succumbed to her injuries at the hospital.  She was 29.

Nation Hahn in his fight for the knife received severe hand lacerations and required several surgeries and therapy so hard did he fight for his wife’s life.  Imagine willingly grabbing onto the cutting edge of a large blade knife to give your wife time to try and get away.

So, Pedoface was arrested and of course because he was busted dead nuts he immediately pretended to attempt suicide.  He cut his wrists down to the bone.  Now, just to put a little perspective on this, while cutting ones wrists down to the bone hurts like a motherfucker, anybody who knows anything knows you want to cut up from the wrist to the elbow, hell even my brother knew that and he was special.  But of course it certainly helps with your not responsible due to mental incapacity defense so hats off for committing to the part you fucking piece of shit.  Then, during pre-trial he bitched that he wasn’t allowed to shave because they wouldn’t give him a razor.  Really Pedoface?  Like seriously for real?  I’m thinking they broke out the no-no just for him cuz the facial hair is obviously gone.

Apparently poor little Pedoface is gay which is of some great importance that nobody but pedoface is aware of. Nation said all their friends knew and nobody had a shit to give. Pedoface was also responsible for the accountings of campaign money having to keep track of incoming, outgoing, and bank balances. He was embezzling money (a whole shit ton of money) and it all just got to be to much for poor booboo.  Once he found out that Jamie was going to rat his ass out he flipped his fucking bean and grabbed the first stabby thing he could put his hands on.

The prosecutor puts me in mind of Jim Blackburn, a laid back southerner, softly spoken but with a whole lot to say. His opening argument as Blackburns was during the MacDonald trial was underwhelming. The defense deferred their opening statement (I fucking hate that they are allowed to do that, it’s like peaking at the winning lottery numbers before the draw.) I have said for years that rule should be abolished and I stand by it.

The prosecutions first witness was an attorney, John Wallace. He looked dapper and about a thousand years old. His specialty is election law.  So there was a whole lot of talk about election accounting measures that made my head want to explode because I don’t care.  So blah blah blah regulatory stuff, blah blah blah, Jamie Hahn Blah blah blah went through all the reports, blah blah blah why are there all these really weird disbursements, blah blah blah somebody is embezzling a shit ton of money.  Ruh roh! Pedoface and Jamie Hahn were both at this meeting.   God this guy is dry as melba toast.  Mmmm, melba toast.   Anyway melba toast guy got a letter saying that the electoral committee had some serious concerns about these very weird disbursements. He also got another letter that he would not normally been privy too stating that a response had been submitted in response to the first letter.  (Hey they’re talking about it so I’m writing it down, I am aware it is as boring as watching paint dry.) Blah Blah Blah serious concerns Blah blah blah more electoral committee stuff.  Screw it.  Money was missing and Pedoface was going to be in a lot of trouble if they found out he took it.

While this dude drones on infinitum, the courthouse if fairly sparsely occupied. Room for a lot more people and I’m surprised that there are not more there.

Thank you baby jesus we have a new witness. Professional recovery consultants. He collects commercial debts when one company owes another company money. He was trying to collect a debt from Jamie Hahn and when she tried to pay it she discovered that her bank account was empty. Hmmmm, wonder how that happened.

Next witness is Angela Cade. She works at the state police credit union and is the woman who called 911 for Jamie and Nation Hahn. She did not know them, but did know the poor bastards who wound up with a dying woman on their front lawn. She described how Jamie had foundered into the neighbors yard and dropped near their front door. She told 911 she thought that maybe Jamie had been shot due to the amount of blood on her. EMS arrived quickly and took Jamie but Nation was in so much shock he did not even realize the extent of his own injuries. Angela asked the other EMS response to please look at him because he was injured.

She said police swarmed the Hahn house, guns drawn and then she kind of lost her composure for a couple of minutes. The judge allowed her to collect herself and then she had to look at the exhibits and point out where Jamie Hahn fell.

That’s it for tonight kids. We will continue with this trial tomorrow, I simply cannot take another minute of it right now.
RBMD peacing the fuck out.

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From The Really Big Mean Dog Family

March 12, 2015

Mama, wishing you good surgery, a fast recovery and hoping your feisty self is back here before we know it.  We all have come to love you and we are all thinking about you today.  DH best be emailing me when you are out of surgery ya hear?  Love you mama.

Connie- A very happy birthday my friend.  I hope it brings all you desire.


An Auntie Really Big Mean Dog Bedtime Story.

March 10, 2015

Hai everybody. It’s me, your Dean of Fuckery/Law Professor, Queen of the Universe (I won the pageant) resident sarcasm expert and doctor of doctoring. Since the court scene basically sucks balls right now, I figured I would try and keep you entertained with an Auntie Really Big Mean Dog Bedtime Story. So, get your cocoa, pull up a chair and listen.

While wandering down the train tracks on one of my patented carry my computer tower and keyboard while dragging 10 million feet of cable behind me walks, I stumbled across a giant cave. It had a fence around it and a sign that said compound. I found this…odd. Now being as I am a nosy fucker who really doesn’t have a fuck to give, and because my computer tower was getting pretty fucking heavy I dumped that bitch and went to check out what was in the cave.

It was a deep, dark, gross cave. Like seriously hazmat level gross. I wandered in deeper while contemplating whether I had remembered to move that damn plane or not. Can’t have a missing plane sitting in one place for too long you know. It was as I contemplated this that I heard what can only be described as a cackling noise. Not like chicken cackling, more like the cackling of the insane. I was slightly concerned, but being the not giving a fuck sort I decided that I just had to know where it was coming from. I followed the twists and turns in the dank, horrible cave and eventually I saw a flickering light.

I crouched down and crept forward. (Hey, I might not give a fuck but there were crazy noises coming from up ahead.) I wished I had my magic flying carpet that I used to get around the world like I do. It was then that there was a tap on my shoulder. It was Renae, defender of the realm. She had followed my 10 million feet of computer cable. Get out of here she hissed at me, don’t you know where you are? Nuh uh I said, nope, no clue. This is where king Juan banished all the crazy people she told me. Wait, what? There were enough crazy people to banish. Renae shrugged. Well, there were only two but they were really fucking nuts. Oh I said, you must mean…and Renae nodded her head. Summers eve and Massegil she whispered. The douche sisters. I shuddered involuntarily as that news rocked me right to the bottom of my frozen little heart. I thought King Juan was just gonna have them beheaded I whispered back. Nah Renae said, bad PR. I totally got that. So, what do they do in here all day I asked. Hey it seemed like a reasonable question. Oh, they plot ways to bring down King Juan and yourself highness as well as your sister princess via. Man, do they fucking hate you.

I started to move closer. Renae, being the royal protector was a little pissed but she followed me cuz it was kind of her job. I peeked around a corner and what I saw confirmed that my dear old dad King Juan should have just chopped off their heads. The were standing around a barrel with a fire going in it. They were furiously going through back issues of the national enquirer looking to see if bullshit tabloid journalism had changed at all. Massengil kept grinding her teeth and muttering about HER journalist and Summers eve kept going on about how if they took part of this story and added some of that story and just flat out made some shit up the tabloid she worked for would totally print it seeing as there was no editor or anything. Then the cackled again and did a fist bump. We’ll get them they kept saying, we’ll get them all. I looked at Renae, and Renea looked at me and we both just shrugged.

We backed out the way we came and I started coiling up the 7 million feet of computer wire. Renae gathered up the computer and keyboard. Wait I said, why don’t they just come out? Renae looked at me like I’d grown a spare head. Because people would see what they really were if anyone looked long enough. I nodded. Cool I said, the cave seems like a good place for a couple of douches. Want to come help me move a plane? Renae said sure and we walked back to my totally rickety old castle and got on my magical carpet and moved the plane.

While we were on our way back from moving that goddamn plane I asked Renae what was up with Sheriff Joe? Everybody knows he hates the douche sisters, how come he hasn’t just whacked em? Renae, wise sage and protector of the realm that she is told me that Sheriff Joe was having way more fun torturing them slowly. Like how I enquired? Oh, Renae chuckled, like telling massengil that HER reporter really thinks she’s a creepy stalker (which is totally true) but still the sheriff found her foaming at the mouth reaction amusing. What about Summers eve I asked. Oh her, he’s the one that hooked her up with the tabloid so that she would have no choice but to write more and more ridiculous things in order to get those hits she so desperately needs. Next week he said he is going to tell her that Stabby escaped just to see if she prints it. Spoiler, she totally will. I was giggling furiously now. Was it sheriff Joe that told her that I’m the one who got stabby off all the way from Ontario? Nah Renae said, she thought that one up all on her own. I was laughing so hard now Renae was very close to POINTS. And the morons believe it I managed to gasp out? Nah Renae said, they are starting to realize that you don’t get exiled to a cave for being a functioning member of society. Okay, one last question Renae I said and I’ll drop you at dads castle. Shoot Renae said. What the fuckity fuck is with the hat on summers eve? Is she color blind, does she have a bald spot, is it some counter culture statement. What is the deal with the fucking hat? Oh that was sheriff Joe to Renae laughed outright. He told her it looked good. I stared at her in disbelief for a couple of seconds and then laughed so goddamn hard I almost fell off my own flying carpet. Dude I said, tell Sheriff Joe that my dad wants to invite him for dinner. Anything he wants. Maybe hasenpfeffer. Renae promised to relay the message and I decided to park my carpet and wander over to King juans Castle to let him know we’d be having company for dinner. My beautiful and talented sister Princess Via had just come in from the days hunt and it was to be hasenpfeffer indeed.  Princess Via had a hatred of rabbits bordering on the pathological so we always ate well.  Except for the ones that stepped on the land mines.

We all had a great laugh and a great meal while Renae and I shared the days adventure.

There you have it children, todays rendition of Auntie Really Big Mean Dogs Bedtime Story.

Have a great night.
RBMD peacing the fuck out!!

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Mama Via Presents A Visit to Death Row Part Two

March 9, 2015

Here it is everyone, the much awaited part two of Mama’s visit to death row.

Visit to Death Row, Part 2
After corresponding with Toney for almost a year, and reading his desire to have a visitor for so long, I filed the paperwork, passed the background check, and decided to go visit.
I looked Toney up on the Internet, just to see if there was a photo. As I suspected, there was. I already knew to expect a black man, so the photo was no big surprise. He would be considered nice looking, medium tone skin, short black hair dark brown eyes. He wasn’t smiling, and the photo was just head and shoulders, so I had no idea how tall or large he was. I had my first panic attack then. Writing a letter is one thing, but going to visit a murderer? Mama, what the hell are you thinking?
I wrote to Toney, and said I would come to visit on Saturday. And, as the day got nearer, I began having panic attacks…then, I would talk myself down…after all, I was meeting him within a PRISON…NOT in a dark alley! I said I would do this and I was adamant that I would keep my word!
You may remember that my dad was in the Navy. Because of that, and the issue with my biological egg-donor, my sister and I moved frequently. We also changed schools several times due to “bussing” laws. The experience of constantly changing school districts, attending new schools, meeting new friends and adapting to new environments has actually served me well over my lifetime. In reality, I am a very shy person, but I learned how to outwardly APPEAR calm, cool and collected, but my natural shyness is something I have always had to work at to overcome! I learned pretty quickly that IF I ALLOWED my insecurities and fright to rule me, that I would NEVER have friends. I just APPEAR to be much more confident than I really am!
So, when Saturday rolled around, I showered slowly (procrastinating), ate a little breakfast, kissed my dear husband and got into my car and started my adventure.
Te first 00-150 miles of the area along I-10 between Jacksonville and Tallahassee is just flat, barely inhabited farm land. Raiford is located in Butler County and its economy is dependent on agriculture, timber and the prison complex. The total population of Butler County (2000) was approximately 15,000 people; Raiford had approximately 190 residents living in fewer than 80 homes. The prison at Raiford is just 60 miles from my home, about 90 minutes.
Raiford is the home of Union Correctional Institution (UCI), and Florida State Prison (FSP). The two separate institutions were originally one. UCI was the state’s first prison, and was originally called Florida State Prison, the name going with the newer institution when the two were split. Both institutions house inmates in Death Row facilities. FSP conducts all executions, while most death row inmates are housed at UCI. UCI has the most diverse population of any correctional institution in the state, with close management inmates and psych inmates as well as open population inmates. Most of the latter are age fifty and over. FSP houses the violent and criminally insane, all in solitary confinement. The penitentiary compound encompasses over fifty acres and includes a farm where much food is grown that feeds inmates. The prison is the subject of the Lynyrd Skynyrd song “Four Wall of Raiford” This prison was shown in an episode of the 1960s TV program “The Fugitive”. With my luck, being what it was that day, I started at the WRONG prison, unaware that TWO prisons were on that road, so back into the car and down the road for another 3/10ths mile! (FSP accommodates 1400 inmates, UCI accommodates 2172, and as if 2/25/15, 393 are on Death Row which includes 5 women) (In)Famous inmates (E) executed or (D) died prior to execution were: Ted Bundy (E), Eileen Wournos (E), John Couey (D) and Otis Toole (D) were all inmates at UCI/FSP complex.
The drive from the house up to I-10 was a little hectic; Jacksonville suffers the same infrastructure issues as most large cities, widening the freeway, adding egress ramps, and merging freeways even on a Saturday morning slows progress. But once I was on I-10, the miles just zipped by. I had way too long to think, though, and I had a good case of nerves by the time I got to the Raiford exit. My GPS took me the LONG way, of course…out an old farm-to-market road, where the speed limit was 35-40, instead of 65.
Finally, I arrived at UCI, where Toney was housed. And then, went thru the lengthy protocol to actually get INTO the visiting room…we pick up there…

I opened the door when I heard the entry buzzer, and stepped into a room approximately 50 feet wide by 70 feet long. To the immediate right were two COs, male and female. I stepped over to the desk, and showed my credentials, and the officer told me that he would have the inmate brought out. During that first visit, it was almost a shock to hear “inmate” so often. You become accustomed in real life to “Mr, Jones” or “Toney”, but it seemed that at every opportunity, the COs and staff make a point of using “inmate” as a proper pronoun! There were several boxes of playing cards on the COs desk, and I asked if I could “borrow” them until my “inmate” arrived, and of course, I was granted that. So, I took the cards in hand and glanced around the room.

Along the right wall was a “Concessions” window, next to that, a table with a microwave, some weird little sporks, and condiments, and on either side of the concessions window, a uni-sex water-closet! (Which I VOWED not to use!). On the far side of the room were two soda machines and a machine that dispensed bottled water. On the left side of the room were big windows, but the “view” was only the backside of another building, but sunshine was nice! The middle of the room was filled with stainless steel tables bolted to the floor, and 4 stainless steel stools about 12 inches in diameter. Boy! Those things were COLD on my bootie! Each table was numbered, so I went to the table I had been assigned to, and tried to look around without looking like Mrs. Farmer Brown Just Come to Town! There were probably 20 tables in the room, and only 5 were occupied. One table was occupied by a Jewish couple. There was one table with a black inmate and a younger white lady, and the rest were white couples and one couple with a young child. Toney later told me that culturally, white families tend to come and visit, black families generally do not.

As I sat at my table, trying not to watch others in the room…occasionally a man dressed in his prison uniform would step thru a door I hadn’t noticed, next to the men’s room. I would look up, expectantly, and check if the person coming into the room was Toney. Even tho I had tried to memorize the face in the picture on the web page, I hadn’t done a very good job. Everyone and no one looked like him! Some were obvious, white inmates, Jewish inmates, corrections officers…I was starting to feel like I was sitting at the bar of Denim & Diamonds circa 1985, hoping some cowboy would ask me to do a little “boot-scooting”…

FINALLY…he came thru the door…(and I was already ready to go home)…I stood up and gave him a quick, light hug…then we both sat down. He told me that he didn’t remember the last time he had been hugged. I kinda felt sorry for him actually…

It was probably 12:30 or 12:45 by the time he entered the room. I asked if he had lunch yet, and he said he had, but he was still hungry. So, I bought us some sodas out of the machine as he stood in the canteen line. When I joined him in line I noticed that the two best sellers at the window were “honey buns” and “hot dogs”…either way, they were nuked in the microwave…it was one of those box contraptions that has a dial timer on it, not digital, so you aren’t sure if the 2 minutes was really 2 minutes or 10! Everything came out of the micro the same: over-cooked! Hot dogs were either exploded or more wrinkled than Grampa’s….never mind…pretty cooked, anyway! The “honey buns” seemed to be swimming in yellow stuff, which I assumed to be margarine. Toney chose a honey bun and peanut butter cookies, I selected a container of carrots and celery. (No wonder all these guys have diabetes and colon issues! None if them EAT right!)

My ability to talk to almost anyone came in handy that day. (only my dear MIL, may she RIP, has hated my guts before even learning my name, but as gramma told grampa when his jack-ass kicked him “consider the source!”) We talked about the Arias trial for a good while. I found it interesting that men on death row thought JODI should get the Death Penalty!! The opportunities for recreation on DR are limited, to say the least. Toney must attend 8-10 “counts” every day, but other than that, and his 3 per week shower and 3 per week “rec”– from 4:30 am to 9:30 pm, his time is unstructured. He works on his appeal, writes letters, (he has several pen pals, but I’m his “favorite”! (Want to buy land in Florida?)) read books (1 per week), clean his cell, exercise and “chat” with the fellows in the next cell or with the “good” COs and watch TV! The channels they receive are limited. But do you remember when Court TV went off the air, the slack was picked up by HLN? They didn’t get Court TV, but DID get HLN! So most of them, like us, the trial was the topic for every one!

We talked about his family, we talked about Jacksonville, we talked about 10 or 15 different topics. Mostly, he wanted to know about the world outside. He was amazed that 60″ TVs exist, he’s never been on “the Internet”, never wasted the afternoon with a PlayStation or Wii….it was almost like revealing the world to a newly discovered tribe that had no idea that the rest of the world existed!

At 2:30, I told him that I wanted to beat the rush out…so I gathered my trash, gave him a brief hug and we said goodbye.

Leaving the visiting room was very similar, going thru the maze of fences, checking out, an inventory of my glasses, keys, and jewelry. Waiting in front of gates, listening for buzzers, etc.

I had no thoughts about whether I was affected or not…until I stepped through that last gate and into “freedom”…it was the very same outside air on THIS side of the fence as the outside air on THAT side of the fence…so why did it smell “cleaner”? As I walked to my car, I noticed that there were not as many cars parked in the lot as when I arrived, yet I hadn’t noticed anyone leaving the visiting room. The “beep-beep” of the car’s security system was reassuring in an odd way…I got into the car and started the engine, put the A/C on high and backed out of the space and headed for the entrance. I didn’t understand why *I* was feeling anxious! As my dad used to say “I’m free and 21!”!

A sense of relief came over me as I pulled out on the highway, and began my drive home. Thousands of thoughts swirled through my head. I had a 100 questions I wanted to ask Toney, but, I wasn’t sure I wanted the answers, and in a way, the questions seemed almost “rude”. I am the one and only person in the world that doesn’t call him 300807, I’m the only person who sees him not as an inmate, but a man. That is almost a “gift” isn’t it? Why ruin it?

I also had a lot of thoughts about Arias. I wondered how many of her “supporters” would still be interested in her if they knew nothing of her crime? Many are just “contrarians”, what ever everyone else believes, they will take the opposite side.

Unlike Toney, who isn’t “notorious”, Arias has no anonymity. Wherever she goes, she’s known to be the murderer of Travis Alexander. She’s 90% murderer and 10% everything else, Toney, on the other hand, yes, is incarcerated…but people don’t know his crime first. I was able to see the other parts that make up the man.

Let’s say you had to opportunity to sit and talk with Arias…what would you have to ask about, other than how she murdered Travis? Her tracings would take about a minute, and everything else would take about two minutes. Overall, she’s not very interesting, and the only thing she has ever been successful at accomplishing is…yes….killing Travis Alexander…

That little girl voice she uses would Make me want to knock her block off!! I’ve noticed in her letters, everything is me, me, me, I, I. I…Toney’s letters rarely talk about himself…I have to drag information out of him…and he has tons of questions!

All of these thoughts, and more swirled through my head all the way home….finally, as I drove up to our home, a peace came over me. I parked the car in the garage, went inside…petted Boo, who is not used to Mama being gone THAT long…then went up to my dear husband’s office.

I was overwhelmed with the love I have for him. He has not once raised his voice, not even a sharp “NO!” To Boo when he is being naughty. I’ve never seen him angry. Yes, he’s kinda a “crusty old fart” on the outside, but he’s a big old marshmallow on the inside. Always “there” when I need a hug, always there for anything I need. Always level-headed, thoughtful and compassionate. Always supportive in whatever project I’m working on.

It was easy to forget Union Correctional Institution, Toney and yes, even the Arias trial when my dear husband stood up and walked over to me…and just hugged me and held me close. No words were necessary. He would ask questions later…right then, he knew I just need him to hold me, and reassure me that all was well in my world.

Statistics: longest on Death Row: Freddie Hall DOB:7/21/45. Received: 12/24/68
Oldest in DR: Nelson Serrano DOB:9/15/38 Received: 6/26/2007
Approximately 177 inmates have been on death row prior to 1996
Women on death row in Florida:
Tiffany Cole. DOB:12/3/81 R:3/7/08 Double murder/buried couple alive
Amelia Carr. DOB: 8/4/84. R:2/23/11. Murdered BFs x-wife/duct taped to chair,suffocated
Margaret Allen. DOB: 1/26/66.R5/19/11 Tortured housekeeper for hours before murdering her
Ana M. Cardona D:11/26/61.R:7/12/11 Tortured/murdered 3-year old son-Baby Lollipop
Tina Brown B:7/19/70. R:10/3/12 Beat V w/stungun, tire iron & set on fire-2 weeks to die

NOTES: Current status of State Executions:
Executions in Florida are currently STAYED to allow time for the U.S. Supreme Court to hear a case challenging Oklahoma’s lethal injection protocols. (Florida uses the same lethal injection protocol as Oklahoma)

#On February 13, 2015, Pennsylvania Governor Tom Wolf issued a memorandum announcing a moratorium on all executiions in the state. The memo stated that no executions will take place at least until he has “received and reviewed the forthcoming report of the Pennsylvania Task Force and Advisory Commission on Capital Punishment.”
^On January 30, 2015, the Ohio State Department of Rehabilitation and Corrections announced that it would postpone all of the six executions scheduled in 2015 to that point. All of these executions would be scheduled in 2016 to allow time for the state to obtain new drugs for lethal injections. The new drugs that Ohio announced it would be trying to obtain were sodium thiopental and pentobarbital.
†UPDATE: The U.S. Supreme Court issued a stay on January 28, 2015. On January 26, 2015, the Oklahoma state Attorney General Scott Pruitt asked the United States Supreme Court to stay all executions scheduled to that point. The four inmates on Oklahoma’s death row sued the state on the grounds that the lethal injection protocol violated the Eighth Amendment. On January 23, 2015, the US Supreme Court agreed to hear the case brought forth by the inmates. Pruitt requested the stays to allow the Supreme Court to hear the case and reach a decision regarding the constitutionality of Oklahoma’s lethal injection protocol.
*On September 9, 2014, the Ohio State Department of Rehabilitation Corrections revised its execution schedule for all death sentences previously scheduled from March 2014 and beyond. This was done in order to comply with the August 6, 2014 Federal Court ruling that no executions could be carried out until at least January 2015. The court imposed this moratorium in order to compel a review of Ohio’s lethal injection protocol.

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