Hello my lovelies. It is me, back from my hiatus. Before I get into the meat, potatoes and other assorted vegetation of todays blog I would like to thank my Mama for covering for me during my absence. I want you to know that I have missed all of you, missed the blog and the Fuckery that I bring.
To everyone who has emailed me, I apologize for not getting back to you in a timely fashion, I have simply not been up to emails or blogs, or pretty much anything for that matter. That being said, nobody ever gets better wallowing in their own whatever, so here I am.
A note about my child and it will be the last one. For those of you who do not comprehend the English language, my child did not live with me for a long period of time for safety reasons. The police, victims services and myself all agreed that him being somewhere that my ex did not know about was probably in his best interest. Since he was outed we all convened and decided that I should bring him home for several reasons that are between myself, my son and the police. So yes crabs, I have a child and had you read one of my very first blog posts, you would know that. It isn’t like I tried to hide the fact that I had given birth. And yup, you pissed me off. So please by all means EAT A DICK!
Over the last several weeks your Law Professor/Dean of Fuckery/Queen of all I survey has been thinking about a ton of stuff. First and foremost is why won’t Stabby go away. The in house psychic got out the Pretoria pukebucket and read the letter to the idiots that are still enamored and promised a reading on what she really meant. Look forward to it.
What I have mostly been thinking about is the afterlife. I have several theories I guess on what happens after you die, and I am more than a little curious about what you all think. I know that the consensus seems to be that you are reunited with your loved ones (and for obvious reasons that doesn’t fly for me) but makes me happy for all y’all that subscribe to that notion.
So here is what I came up with. (I actually dreamed it one of my fun filled nights.) My physical and mental infirmities would no longer be a factor. I would be strong physically and mentally like before all this shit happened. I would discover that I had a Bear as my new best friend. We would spend our days wandering the earth, which had been purged of all the nasty assed people on it and only the good people remained. The people with truly good hearts. Everyone that has become friends on the blog would somehow find each other and decide that even in person we all loved each others company. We would form one solid group that always had each others backs. If there was ever trouble we dealt with it as a single unit. If anyone was ever sad or scared all the rest of us would help hold them up until it passed.
Arkham(the bear) would find us all of our food and we would all journey together. We would let all the animals in the zoos free and watch as they all happily galloped away. We would figure out a way to free all the cetaceans in captivity and watch as they swam happily away, having to never do tricks for fish again. Once we had accomplished that we would destroy the last of the vehicles. There would be nothing but a couple of electric cars for emergencies and only rudimentary electricity which would immediately shut down if we got greedy with it. The climate would stabilize because there were no more factories and stuff. We would discover a huge castle somewhere that was obviously owned by someone less than nice since it would be empty and we would live amongst its 2000 rooms. Everybody would have whatever pet they wanted whether it was one they currently had or one that had died previously and had been waiting at the rainbow bridge for the owner they loved when we crossed it. We would be completely self sufficient. Men would be allowed but the first time one raised a hand to anybody the offended party would get to decide how to deal with him. No matter what the punishment was we would all back that play.
Mama and Gramma would show us how to plant in spring so we were ready for winter. Renae would have her medical degree so we had a doctor if anybody got sick, but nobody ever would. We would live in our castle completely content until I woke up and I don’t know what happened after that.
I hate the theory that when we die it’s just like a light going out. It is as good a theory as any I suppose but it is my least favorite theory. Funny thing is it used to be the thing I yearned for. Of course if that does happen I guess I won’t ever know anyway.
What I want is to know what you guys think. It isn’t a morbid thought, it’s a happy thought. So think about it. What happens? I know everybody has a theory, it is the one thing on earth everyone has contemplated at one time or another so tell us. I know I want to know.
I know it’s a short one, but it’s my first blog back so please, a little patience while I readjust to my normal smart assed self.
I missed you guys and I’m glad I’m back and Mama, thank you a bajillion for covering for me. You were great.
That is all for tonight everybody. I’ll be back tomorrow, or the in-house psychic will be, one of us anyway.
RBMD peacing the fuck out.