A Letter to My Fellow Iowans

January 30, 2016
A word about the anti-Obama-Rants–or how “the Hope-y Change-y Thing-y ain’t working…”

An Iowan speaks…

Eight years ago, we all listened to stories and hype about “hope” and “change”…I don’t care WHO says it,,,things ARENT going to change…of ALL the candidates campaigning, the ONLY one who has a clue about what happens AFTER the election, after the swearing in is Clinton (who, btw-I don’t like)…she was there, thru every day and year of Clinton’s presidency, so she knows that all the promises a candidate makes ends up being bullshit…mostly because (unless an “Executive Order” is issued) (which, if you listen to the GOP candidates is “against the law”) all the president can REALLY do is suggest the Legislators actually legislate! Truly, his hands are tied by Congress & Senate…only THEY can take legislative action and enact laws, which the president then signs.  Obama “pushed the Health Care Act thru” but…it was by his “Leadership” of the congress & Senate, (and a LOT of pushing by Senator Ted Kennedy!)….admittedly, the bill got thru the process by the very SLIMMEST of margins.  So few, in fact that the Republicans have complained ever since that “one fewer vote in the Senate or a change of four votes in the House would have been enough to defeat ObamaCare!”   Obama signed the legislation into law on March 23, 2009 only two days after the House vote.  As a result, the majority of GOP candidates continue to stand on the “I’m going to repeal Obama Care on my first day in office!”  Personally, I don’t have an opinion about the Health Care Act–I have Medicare, and both my son and husband have healthcare through their employers, I have no need for the ACA!   My point here is not whether the Affordable Care Act (ACA) aka-Obama Care, is good or bad…but to discuss that Obama did not legislate that law unilaterally.  A President is supposed to show “Leadership” and the Congressmen & Senators of his party are supposed to go do their jobs and “Legislate”….if it is a “bad law” then, it is an issue with the Legislative Branch of Government, not the Executive Branch exclusively.  Well, enough about the ACA.

The point I’m trying to make is that none of the three branches (Executive, Legislative and Judicial) are able to enact Legislation unilaterally. I feel that it is unfair and unjust to place all if the blame for ACA, or any OTHER law solely on the Obama’s shoulders.

I’ve decided that I am going to vote for “None of the Above”.  Apparently, Hillary will be the democratic nominee.  I’m not thrilled with that.  I believe she is just another “slimy politician”.  From the very beginning of the Clinton’s entrance into national politics, they’ve had some sort of “shenanigans” going on in their lives.  She is a classic “enabler” for her husband’s “naughty behavior”, the biggest being Lewinski.  Not one of us here would hesitate to question “what else is he hiding”????  After all,.we ALL know “how men are” (or at least the majority of them) (current husbands and significant others excluded) If you catch someone hiding “one thing”, guaranteed that there are other peccadilloes hiding in the sand box too!!  

While we are talking about Ms. Clinton… let’s not forget White Water, Vince Foster, Dick Morris, the EMail scandal, Benghasi, Juanita Broaddrick, the Clinton Foundation, etc, etc…and, I know I’m speaking heresy here, but, her balls are just a little to big for my liking…I’m old and I’m old fashioned!  I don’t like the “feminist” movement, from what I’ve seen, none of them seem very “feminine” to me…and as for Clinton…she’s loud, brash and her laugh sounds like a jackass braying!  They way I see it… I don’t want to be “equal” to men; I’m perfectly happy being superior!

Bernie Sanders…I remember Nikita Kruschev, I still remember the Berlin Wall…and during the Bay of Pigs Affair, I remember being taught to  “Duck & Cover” (hiding under my school desk and covering my head with my arms) as if that was going to save my ass from the nuclear bomb dropped on San Diego…then, after the “all clear” we would all line up outside and wait for our parents to come pick us up….yeah…right…I also remember that the Russians said that they would “conquer from within, not without”…so, someone like Bernie Sanders, who says he is a “Democratic Socialist” scares the hell out of me!

I’m not sure, actually, who frightens me more…Clinton, Sanders or Trump.  Someone needs to tell The Donald that this isn’t a marriage or a reality show.  If he decides he doesn’t like being President (assuming he is elected)..he can’t just “not show up” or “go pout in his plane”!  The Presidency isn’t what’s behind door #1 if you win.  This is serious stuff.  And when you screw up (WHEN not IF) millions of people are going to be “mean” to you!  Megyn Kelly isn’t even a percentage point as “mean” as some people are going to be.  Donnie, baby…you ain’t SEEN MEAN or UNFAIR yet!!!  

I hope that my fellow Iowans consider the actions that The Donald pulled on the debate last night!  THAT, my friends, was a temper tantrum!  I do not like the Donald…I don’t like the way he talks to women (very disrespectful), I don’t like the way he talks to and about Hispanics and other people of color, and I don’t like his views about Muslims.  Our country was built on the basis of religious freedom…Donald is divisive, and with the peril our country faces, we need to pull together, not become more xenophobic!!  I’ve never liked bullies…and The Donald is a BULLY!! (You’re FIRED!)  The thought of Donald dealing diplomatically (like Regan or Nixon did) frightens me!  We need someone to have a line in the sand when we need a line in the sand….but we don’t need someone who is flattered by some empty words muttered by Putin…or to go off on a willy-nilly tantrum if someone doesn’t respect that he is a multi-zillionaire!!  Trump is a loose cannon!

And, as a note…just to be honest…the debate last night was the very first that wasn’t another episode of “The Donald Trump Show”…that was the VERY FIRST that we heard from TRULY VIABLE candidates for the GOP nomination…but that’s just my opinion…

I’d like to hear more from Rubio, Cruz, Christie and Bush.  I don’t agree with every plank in the GOP platform…but the Democrats have just gotten too weird for my taste.

To my friends, family and fellow Iowans…as you caucus, please consider the future of your town, county, state and Nation…consider your future, the future of your children, grandchildren and great grandchildren….

be careful, be wise, be thoughtful….

The eyes of our Nation are upon you.  Please go to your local Precinct, and Caucus wisely…yours is the first Voice that our Nation will hear.

Thanks for letting me rant, Kelly!

Well, that’s it…all my own words…nothing cut and pasted…

Untitled Because Why Not.

January 28, 2016

Hello lovelies, it is me, your Dean of Fuckery/Law Professor/Doctor of Doctoring/honorary DVM/Sarcasm Expert/and Queen of all I survey.

I’m working on a synopsis of the Vancallis trial to date, but the judge is giving me so much material it is taking some time.  I will try and have the first 3 days up tomorrow.

I’ve been extremely busy here so please forgive the tardiness.  Jian Ghomeshi’s trial starts Monday so I’ve been doing a lot of research into that.  For those that don’t know he was the host of an extremely popular CBC program as well as the lead singer for Moxy Fruvous for a while.  He is charged with a bunch of stuff, four sexual assault charges and one charge of overcoming resistance by choking.  He is saying it was consensual the women who’s charges stood rolled their eyes so hard they are probably still stuck in the back of their eye sockets.  It is going to be a media clusterfuck and you have no idea how very badly I would like to be there.  I’d have a panic attack in under a minute with a packed courtroom so for now that is out.  I am however, hoping that between now and Monday I can talk somebody into going for me.  If any of you watch The Trailer Park Boys (I personally don’t) the actress that plays the wife of one of them is one of the victims. He has opted for trial by Judge only, which I think is as smart a move as he could have made.  Jury trials for sexual assaults are a crap shoot whether you are guilty or innocent.

Jian is not expected to take the stand, BUT if it is looking like the Judge finds the witnesses credible, he will likely have to take the stand.  He can’t be forced to take the stand, but it would likely be in his best interest if the Judge is believing the witnesses.  Did he do it?  I absolutely believe he did.  Will he be convicted?  I seriously doubt it.  He has been getting away with this shit since university, so I doubt it.  Is his career over? Most likely.  Is he a pariah? Jian according to all sources including personal sources has considered himself all that and a bag of chips for years, he is not well liked by most of the people that actually know him and he is allegedly one of the biggest misogynistic pricks that has ever walked the planet.  So yeah, I’d say his career is pretty much over.

He is actually the very definition of misogyny.   Misogyny is the hatred or dislike of women or girls. Misogyny can be manifested in numerous ways, including sexual discrimination, belittling of women, violence against women, and sexual objectification of women. Misogyny can be found occasionally within ancient texts relating to various mythologies. I looked, but so far no picture.

There was also the officer that was convicted yesterday of attempted murder of a guy that was already dead.  Yes I really just typed that.  So, the short version is there was a dude on a bus or streetcar (I’m not going to check) brandishing a knife.  A very pointy knife.  The police were called and told dude to drop said knife.  He didn’t so the officer shot him three times.  Then after some sober second though and probably worried about all the zombie movies he has seen he decided to put another six into the kid just to be sure he stayed dead. He was charged, released on bail because cops are special and was put on paid desk duty until the case was adjudicated.  He was charged with murder, manslaughter and attempted murder.  The fucked up thing about our justice system here in good old Canada is that the jury found the first three shots justified so found him not guilty of murder, but the next six were just being a dick and convicted him of attempted murder of a dead kid.

Since he is a police officer, he will likely get a couple of years.  For killing a kid brandishing a knife.  Seriously, I have said it a hundred times and I will say it a hundred more times.  A lot of people who join the police force, or the army have very serious issues.  They hate specific groups, they feel a need to be the authoritarian, the are power hungry etc.  And they get to carry guns.  Yay for us.

Now, I’ve dealt with a LOT of police officers due to my ex life.  Their visits were frequent to the point that is was an oddity not to see them at least once on the weekend.  I found that while they did their jobs, they showed nothing but disdain for me because I stayed and took it, therefore I must somehow deserve it.  Police are not trained in a lot of things and the biggest one I still believe is domestic violence.  They would take my ex, but he’d get released the next day at first just with a promise to appear, and then 2000 bail, and then 3000, and then 5000.  When you own a viable business, 5000 is nothing. I stated that once to the police and their response was that the judicial system doesn’t feel that prohibitive bail for someone who owns a business that employs people is good for anyone.  Apparently the victims don’t count.  My day came though. I finally got an officer that was supportive and with her encouragement I found the strength needed to spill all of it. She was a good officer and I am grateful for her. But for every one of her there are ten that are not like her.  Even the police blame the victim.

The reason for that story is that things seem to be changing.  Police seem to be coming up on charges a lot in Ontario all of a sudden.  Something the public has known forever is suddenly being discovered by the higher ups, and that makes me happy.  To serve and protect should mean something.  It really should and I am starting to have faith that in Canada, it once again just might.

In other Canadian news our dollar sucks, so if you Americans want to shop come here, diesel prices continue to fall (YAY!!!) but, oddly gas was up 2 cents today.  Which is still pretty decent for gas so I’m not bitching.  Food prices have gone completely off the fucking charts.  I have a theory about that but that is for another blog.  I asked my son to hit the grocery on his lunch to get us a cauliflower.  When he came home he did not have the cauliflower because it was Six fucking dollars.  Meat is no longer an option.  I was going to try and swing a  quarter of beef, even ordered it, but cancelled the next day because it is just way too expensive.  Is this going on in the States as well?  Like everything has suddenly gone up exponentially? I’m going to start growing my own veggies in the summer.  My son and I have all these acres we don’t do anything with, so he drew out a diagram of a large garden and he said he’d to all the turning of the sod and mixing of the soil since we are on heavy clay and then I could plant it.  It should be fun and the grocery store can eat a dick.

Anyway, that is it for this evening, I hope everyone is well.

RBMD peacing the fuck out.



Trials And Other Stuff

January 23, 2016

Hello lovelies. Your Dean of Fuckery/Law Professor/Dr. of Doctoring, Honorary DVM, and Queen of all I survey has some news on a few things.

First, we are going to follow the James Vancallis Trial and then when the precious flower Dahlia’s trial comes up we will follow both.   I will catch you up on the first trial over the next couple of days and once Dahlia’s trial starts you will get two blogs a day if the first Trial is not over. 

I have also decided that it’s our blog and I don’t have to let anybody on it that we don’t want on it.  I can’t stop people from reading it, but the ignorant comments that we get every now and then, I don’t have to post them and from now on I don’t intend to.  I have decided that arguing on the internet is close to one of the largest wastes of time in in the history of ever.  Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but when that opinion cannot be given without acting like a petulant 6 year old,  that makes petulant 6 year old the party in the wrong.  Answering them or actually engaging in an argument is pretty much the definition of insanity.  So, nasty comments will be removed and the sender will be marked as spam and that will be the end of that. 

Our no kill shelter is supposed to be a place where we can share ideas and horse around and even if we disagree, do so in the manner that friends do and I intend for it to be that.  Please weigh in if you agree that arguing with idiots is a waste of time. I want this place to be what it was meant to be. A place to share, and laugh, and get a virtual hug if you need one, and tell your stories when you are ready.  Believe me, somebody else here, be it me or one of the others has been or is going through the same thing.  I want us to hold each other up, and give each other a gentle nudge that putting anyone on blast on the internet is pretty much a waste of time.  Me especially.  I know I have a tendency to freak the fuck out when someone I care about is attacked, but I have come to the conclusion that this is exactly the response that is wanted and I don’t want to play anymore.  So if I need a kick in the ass give me one please and let’s make our shelter the way it was.  Lots of fun and lots of love.

I am saddened to say that here in Canada where these things are very, very few and far between we have had a school shooting in La Loche, Saskatchewan.  A native reserve was the scene at a 900 student school that teaches children from kindergarten right up to grade 12 in two buildings. The shooter first killed both of his brothers before heading to school with a shot gun (a long gun that does a massive amount of damage) and proceeded to kill a teacher’s aide as well as a teacher.  The aide died on the scene and the teacher died on route to the hospital. The shooter, who can’t be named under the youth criminal justice act (he is 17) has been charged with 4 counts of first degree murder and 7 counts of attempted murder.  While we have had this happen a couple of times over the last 30 years, this does not happen with any type of frequency in Canada.  I sincerely worry about the way the world is going. 

Celebrities keep on dropping like flies.  To add to Lemmy Killmister and David Bowie we now have lost Alan Rickman, Glenn Frey, David Margulies and Rene Angelil-(Celine Dion’s Husband.) Sorry, I can’t figure out how to put the French keyboard on so no accents.  Alan Rickman was an absolutely brilliant actor who will forever be Severous Snape to me and Glenn Frey was one of the founding members of one of the best bands of all time, The Eagles. So, so much loss of extraordinary talent.  So very sad. 

Lastly, I have been asked to write a half hour cable show once a week on the topics of my choosing. Sort of a Daily Planet idea if you have ever seen that.  I of course am not allowed to use my favorite word which bums me out a little but I will get over it.  They have asked me to script 10 episodes and if they are well received I will do more.   I can do it from home, which is awesome.  It’s just a cable station so it is not a huge deal, but I do get writing credit and press credentials. I have not formally accepted yet, but my invisible psychiatrist thinks it would be good for me so, I am going to take the offer.

Once the first shows are done I will let you know what station and you can check it out.  For obvious reasons, I won’t say right now.  

That’s it for tonight

RBMD peacing the fuck out

So, What Is Your Pleasure?

January 21, 2016

We have some trials that have just started and some just about to start.  The carnation trial, Dahlia Dipolito’s retrial (the one who tried to whack her husband and then said they were just making it up for a reality tv idea) and the Vancallis Trial started a couple of days ago and that one has a very no nonsense and very cantankerous judge.

What is your pleasure my lovelies? One of the above or something different. Let me know so that I can get on it.

RBMD Peacing the fuck out..


Let’s Talk About This Guy For A Moment

January 18, 2016

Hello my lovelies. your Dean of Fuckery and Queen of all I survey had her attention brought to this fucktard by another blogger, good ole Pesky who is definitely not afraid to call a…no that would not be PC; a piece of shit a piece of shit. Well, she went and found a big one and after I read about the misogynistic bastard and what he is doing with his time I decided that for those of you who don’t read Pesky, you definitely need to read about this person. Sad the best part of him probably ran down his mama’s leg, but we can only work with what we are given.

So, meet Kareem Williams, AKA Lefty (my guess is that is his “girlfriend hand” because in my opinion my Camaro has a better chance of getting laid than good ole Lefty. lefty

Kareem brags about the Rolex on his wrist, yet allegedly lives in a shitty little apartment somewhere in Philly.  Now Kareem here, acts as if he is completely love struck by the idea of money  I mean Stabby that he decided to write a rap song about her PTSD and how Nurmi is a tool and it should have been second degree manslaughter.  The fact that he can A)not Rap B)not Rhyme)and C)has a shitty voice had no bearing what-so-ever on his decision to write, have produced and record said rap song.

It’s bad, like that sound a cat makes when you step on it’s tail bad. That however is not the problem and there are a number of problems that Lefty doesn’t seem to get.  First, Stabby probably does have PTSD but she got it from killing Travis, she did not have it beforehand. Second, Stabby is not a victim of domestic violence and everyone here knows it.  Third, for someone that is so vehemently opposed to women being treated poorly Lefty here can certainly dish it out.

https://varmtnewsnetwork.wordpress.com/  This is Pesky’s blog.  Go there to see the conversation that Mr. Lefty feels is fit for women.  I’ll give you the highlights. He flies in real women because he won’t date American woman (Please read: I have to pay to get laid) He called a woman a hoe, why he thinks she is a farm implement is beyond me but he said it, Told one he bet she liked to suck slow and drink fast (which as an aside is pretty fucking disgustingly rude), tried to get phone numbers, says 85% of American women are dumb AND stupid(I just can’t with this one)called Pesky a cum licker and Krusty (I don’t even know what that means, but it was derogatory I assure you) and finally told everybody his video was going to go viral. Since it has to do with Stabby, odds are good it came with a viral load. As of today it has 2002 hits including the one I had to begrudgingly give him in order to see the horror so you didn’t have too. Oh, and an undisclosed percentage of the billions he is going to make off of his video will be given to Stabby.

Here is an article on LEFTY and his insanity if you are interested.  Seriously, you should read it, it is worth the chuckle.

EDIT: Link keeps 404ing which always pisses me off so type metro in your search bar,go to metro and then search Kareem Williams or Stabby’s given name and it will get you there. That’s it for tonight kids

RBMD peacing the fuck out


Under Pressure

January 13, 2016

Hello my lovelies.  It is me, your long lost dean of fuckery/law professor/doctor of doctoring/honorary DVM/and Queen of all I survey back from the land of no fucking space-bar.

I am very happy to be back. I believe I may have given myself carpul tunnel syndrome since I have been using a spiral notebook or seven to write while the computer lay dead and the borrowed computer was sans space-bar. Mama, being my mama sent me her old laptop which is absolutely awesome in that all the keys work and everything. I really am blessed to know you all.  The laptop is in fantastic shape, it is a little slow just like mama said but I do not have a fuck to give about how slow it is as long as it works. At least now I can post here and send emails that-don’t-look-like-this.

Today I want to talk about David Bowie.  Why?  Because he is one of my favorite artists, because from everything I have ever read he was one of those genuinely good human beings, because he was one of those ethereal beings that don’t seem to be quite of this earth; kind of like Tilda Swinton. Oh, and because he played himself in Zoolander and because my son loved him in Labyrinth as did I.

My oldest brother was the one who introduced me to an eclectic array of music and patiently explained to little tiny me that you don’t have to ever listen to anyone to fit in, you should listen to things that are pleasing to your ears.  That mostly entailed Metal for me although because of him I made room for Johnny Cash and Willie Nelson, Snoop Dogg, Pavarotti, and Elton John to name a few.

Music was one of the only escapes I had from the people that made me, and I spent many a night with David, listening to Hero’s, or ashes to ashes, or bluejean, or China Girl. So many songs. Hero’s always made me feel better, I felt like he was talking to me.

I picked under pressure because of the story that goes with it. David and Freddie of Queen had hooked up to record a totally different song. It was not working out to their satisfaction so the two of them sat in the studio and drank a lot of wine and did a lot of coke and recorded the Acapella version that is in the link above. Someone put a video together with the version on you-tube and since I like visual with my music when I can get it I used that one. This is however the version that they wrote and recorded in one night. Two exceptionally gifted writers. IN.ONE.NIGHT.

For comparisons sake, if anyone here is a Beyonce fan, there are 6 writers on that stupid song “Who Run The World” and apparently not one of them passed remedial English. According to the only source I can find it took 10 days to write, but I have my doubts since it is a fairly simple song. You be the judge.

Also, if any of you really believe girls run the world, please see me for remedial classes.

See! How can one song be written by two drunk and high men in one night and recorded and the other one took six writers (five of which were men by the way)10 days? The answer is because the men were both musical genius’s and the woman has a team of writers and is gorgeous.

When Freddie Mercury died, David was there for the concert in his honor and sang under pressure with Annie Lenox. It was bittersweet according to David Bowie. He said the world lost possibly the greatest musical talent that had ever lived. Freddie was one of the greatest musical talents that ever lived. We lost the other one a couple of days ago.

He died like he lived. Quietly and with great dignity after an 18 month battle with cancer that no-one but his family was aware of. He even left us, his fans a goodbye letter in the form of his final album Black Star. The album dropped 2 days before he did. The opening line of Lazarus is”Look up here, I’m in heaven, I’ve got scars that can’t be seen, I’ve got drama, can’t be stolen, everybody knows me now.”. If there is a heaven, I hope god forgives youthful indiscretions as long as the adult life is well lived. Pick up Black Star if you can. I know you can probably download it for free, but if you were ever a fan do this one last thing for an icon and buy the album.

If there is a god, may he bless you and keep you David Bowie. You gave us all of yourself, every single time. Thank you.

Mama’s Words of Wisdom

January 9, 2016

I can’t remember exactly why this topic came up…but, to keep you somewhat entertained until The Queen of the Universe receives her box and is able to blog again, I offer these ideas for your consideration and discussion.

Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, I worked my way through college. Now, don’t get confused, I didn’t “work my way through college” like “some people” did…and I’m not naming names here, but, THEY seem to think that “working their way thru college” includes Mama & Daddy paying the “out of state” tuition, buying their books, paying for their dorm room and their 3-meals-a-day cafeteria card, giving them a.late model used car (and paying the insurance) and giving them a “small allowance” for supplies, delivered pizza  and other miscellaneous items.  Their Mama always took them to Dillard’s, Macy’s or the Gap for “school clothes” twice a year: September and March …plus more clothing at Christmas and birthdays.  So, why did they “need to work”?  Well, Mumsie & Dad refused to pay for booze binges, pot buys.  Such MEAN parents!!!  Nope, while they were scoping out the drug scene and dancing disco, I was paying rent, utilities, car payment, insurance, food, gas, and supporting my baby boy…(no help from Mama or Daddy, cuz they were both at the Rainbow Bridge!”)
Meanwhile, back at the ranch…I worked two and sometimes THREE Jobs!  I worked for an auctioneer on weekends, calculating and closing customer’s tickets, I occasionally worked at a tavern, serving beer and wine four days a week.  But my “regular” job was working for Personal Products Co.  If you’ve ever used an Always pad, StayFree MaxiPad or o.b. Tampon, you’ve used Personal Products  merchandise.  My job was to meet with the store manager, let him know that a new coupon was going to be in Sunday’s paper, and after checking the stock he had on hand, I would advise him on how much product he needed to order to cover the demand. Sometimes, I would set up and build the “end caps” that you so often see in grocery stores.  My “true job” was to “sell” the store manager the idea of ordering enough product to fill and re-fill that end cap for the duration of the coupon!
There are a few ways to get the grocery manager to do that…what seemed to work best was getting him into the feminine hygene aisle, and start talking about maxi-pads; how much they absorbed, about the new Always covering, the benefits of that new product  or I would talk to him about the o.b. Tampon.  I would explain that it had been invented by a woman,  and because she was a woman, she better understood what women wanted!  Now, mind you, this was back in the Dark Ages…and there weren’t as many “sensitive men” who were willing to be caught dead OR alive on the Feminine Hygene Aisle as there are now…And, yes, like you, I have heard rumors that there are actually real, live men who really DO buy their wives sanitary products!!!  Really…it’s true!!!
Before I began this “Service Representative” job, I was required to attend a sales seminar which taught us about all of the products, the different ways that we could “help” our customers and some basic “sales techniques”.     People are funny sometimes…even with a “buy one-get one’ coupon at a store that “doubles coupons”, the majority of women will NOT accept a bent or crushed box!  They will not accept a box that had insufficient glue on the flaps, either..you know, one of those boxes where the closing flap isn’t quite completely closed!  So, one of my job requirements was to “swap out” bent, crushed, half open boxes for new, pretty product!  One of the “perks” of that job was that I could keep all the crushed boxes that I wanted to keep…or give them to family or friends…I also gave TONS of  product to the local women’s shelters, and to churches which had programs to assist unemployed or under priveledged women!  (I didn’t BUY sanitary products for YEARS!)
During the seminar I attended, I learned one thing that has helped me all through my life…I learned all about W I I F M. (Pronounced wiff ’em”)
When asking someone to do something for you, whether it is a customer to placing an order…or your husband buying you a new car…you need to remember that EVERY person has a sign on their chest with WIIFM written on it!
What’s In It For Me?  You have to be subtle, you have to have class, you can’t lose your temper or fly off the handle…you must be smart, you must be prepared and you must present your ideas (or “sales pitch”) properly and gently.  But, anything you want or desire can be had by presenting WIIFM!  In OUR family, Papa is the President and Tresurer, and I am the Vice President and Dog Walker.  My social security is my “allowance”…I make my car payment, storage fees, cell phone bill, my credit card bills and most of my medical bills…but, I sometimes have a big purchase, like when I bought my car, for instance…and, right now, a LOT of the upgrades in the house we are building, papa and I must discuss the advantages, the benefits and the value of our upgrades.
In addition to knowing the “pros & cons” of every issue, this technique” works best when you know a person’s motivation.  In the case of the grocery store manager, whose bonuses and salary are tied to sales…he wants enough product in stock and out on the floor…he doesn’t want a stock boy filling up that empty spot on the shelf every two hours, and he doesn’t want Mrs. Smith to go across the street to his competitor, who was smart enough to build a huge end cap and order extra stock!  
My ex-husband was motivated (consumed)  by greed first (and always) and secondly, he wanted to be seen as “Anglo” as possioble and to APPEAR to be educated (like 281129 he used big words incorrectly) but he refused to go to college!  He wanted to APPEAR to be successful by “having all the toys”, etc, etc. so,  when I needed a new car, I selected
PP  the BMW Z3 (not ONLY because that’s what I wanted) but because I knew it would appeal to his “toys” hang up, it appealed to the way he pictured himself…and, perhaps most rewarding to him…was that not two months after our purchase, his (competitive) brother bought one just like it…
As papa and I go thru the selections for our new home…I know his motivations too…his primary motive is for us to have a nice home that will be safe for both of us for the next 20 to 30 years, and secondly, to have a home that “makes mama happy and healthy”!  (Isn’t he wonderful! But I’d be willing to bet he NEVER bought a box of sanitary product!) When we went to visit our friends down in West Palm Beach, a LOVELY, wonderful, funny, and charming gay couple, I spend a great part of the day just floating in their pool, I also did Aqua-cizes of all sorts…and each day, after my floating and exercising, I felt a thousand times better   So, when the subject came up about having a pool, he didn’t hesitate, the pool was part of the build!  Neither of us are motivated by social pressure, the need to be admired, or the need to have someone “like” us.  We like ourselves, we accept ourselves…we like who we are as a couple, and really don’t give a flying flip if someone DOESNT like us.  We try our best everyday to be the best person we can be.  To live our lives with the morals, scruples and ethics that our parents and grand parents taught us and if someone doesn’t like us….there are MILLIONS more people that we can get to meet and get to know! (plenty of fishes in the sea!!)
So, do I still use WIIFM?  Yep, and my number one client is ME!!  It helps me make hard decisions.  I consider benefits…I consider consequences…in fact, it has helped me make better decisions in my life…Make better plans…sure, it takes more effort, you must look deeper into cause/effect, you must think about things a bit more, research them more (and  pay attention to someone other than yourself…but none of US do that!). Despite the effort, I think you will find the results worthwhile….after all…this is the one and only life we have…lets make it the best possible!

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