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Trials And Other Stuff

Hello lovelies. Your Dean of Fuckery/Law Professor/Dr. of Doctoring, Honorary DVM, and Queen of all I survey has some news on a few things.

First, we are going to follow the James Vancallis Trial and then when the precious flower Dahlia’s trial comes up we will follow both.   I will catch you up on the first trial over the next couple of days and once Dahlia’s trial starts you will get two blogs a day if the first Trial is not over. 

I have also decided that it’s our blog and I don’t have to let anybody on it that we don’t want on it.  I can’t stop people from reading it, but the ignorant comments that we get every now and then, I don’t have to post them and from now on I don’t intend to.  I have decided that arguing on the internet is close to one of the largest wastes of time in in the history of ever.  Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but when that opinion cannot be given without acting like a petulant 6 year old,  that makes petulant 6 year old the party in the wrong.  Answering them or actually engaging in an argument is pretty much the definition of insanity.  So, nasty comments will be removed and the sender will be marked as spam and that will be the end of that. 

Our no kill shelter is supposed to be a place where we can share ideas and horse around and even if we disagree, do so in the manner that friends do and I intend for it to be that.  Please weigh in if you agree that arguing with idiots is a waste of time. I want this place to be what it was meant to be. A place to share, and laugh, and get a virtual hug if you need one, and tell your stories when you are ready.  Believe me, somebody else here, be it me or one of the others has been or is going through the same thing.  I want us to hold each other up, and give each other a gentle nudge that putting anyone on blast on the internet is pretty much a waste of time.  Me especially.  I know I have a tendency to freak the fuck out when someone I care about is attacked, but I have come to the conclusion that this is exactly the response that is wanted and I don’t want to play anymore.  So if I need a kick in the ass give me one please and let’s make our shelter the way it was.  Lots of fun and lots of love.

I am saddened to say that here in Canada where these things are very, very few and far between we have had a school shooting in La Loche, Saskatchewan.  A native reserve was the scene at a 900 student school that teaches children from kindergarten right up to grade 12 in two buildings. The shooter first killed both of his brothers before heading to school with a shot gun (a long gun that does a massive amount of damage) and proceeded to kill a teacher’s aide as well as a teacher.  The aide died on the scene and the teacher died on route to the hospital. The shooter, who can’t be named under the youth criminal justice act (he is 17) has been charged with 4 counts of first degree murder and 7 counts of attempted murder.  While we have had this happen a couple of times over the last 30 years, this does not happen with any type of frequency in Canada.  I sincerely worry about the way the world is going. 

Celebrities keep on dropping like flies.  To add to Lemmy Killmister and David Bowie we now have lost Alan Rickman, Glenn Frey, David Margulies and Rene Angelil-(Celine Dion’s Husband.) Sorry, I can’t figure out how to put the French keyboard on so no accents.  Alan Rickman was an absolutely brilliant actor who will forever be Severous Snape to me and Glenn Frey was one of the founding members of one of the best bands of all time, The Eagles. So, so much loss of extraordinary talent.  So very sad. 

Lastly, I have been asked to write a half hour cable show once a week on the topics of my choosing. Sort of a Daily Planet idea if you have ever seen that.  I of course am not allowed to use my favorite word which bums me out a little but I will get over it.  They have asked me to script 10 episodes and if they are well received I will do more.   I can do it from home, which is awesome.  It’s just a cable station so it is not a huge deal, but I do get writing credit and press credentials. I have not formally accepted yet, but my invisible psychiatrist thinks it would be good for me so, I am going to take the offer.

Once the first shows are done I will let you know what station and you can check it out.  For obvious reasons, I won’t say right now.  

That’s it for tonight

RBMD peacing the fuck out

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44 Responses to Trials And Other Stuff

  1. renaes24 says:

    Good for you Kelly! I am sure you will do a wonderful job (even without the use of a ton of your usual verbiage).

  2. Linda Brunetto says:

    Congrats! That is awesome! I do agree that arguments over the internet are a waste of time and only provide entertainment for others.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Linda. I’m glad you agree, so if I start participating please feel free to tug my collar.

  3. Margo B says:

    Right on Kelly! “Answering them or actually engaging in an argument is pretty much the definition of insanity.” Ain’t that the truth?! As a fellow Canadian I too am shocked and saddened by the recent killings in La Loche. I wasn’t aware that the shooter had killed to brothers also. It’s always a shock to hear of it happening in the States but here at home it’s much more so as, thankfully, it doesn’t happen often. On another note, congrats on the new contract and I hope to be able to catch them once they air! Looking forward to following these trials with you in your own special style (lol!) – no one can tell it like you. 🙂 Is the Justin Ross Harris trial also on your list? Set to start in April, I believe. Also just want to add that Juan’s new book, Conviction: The Untold Story, about Stabby’s trial, will be on the bookshelves next month and I can’t wait to start reading! Love to you, and all the group! xoxo

  4. spellbound4 says:

    Absolutely agree that you are making the right choice …. arguing only feeds their ego and keeps them coming back. Ignore, ignore, and block if needed. Right on!

    Very sad to hear of another school shooting. What is the world coming to?

    Congrats on the new show! I am sure you will do fine and have fun also. Good luck.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Spellbound. Thank you. I think Hawking is right and the human race is not going to last another hundred years. Thank you so much. Remember though, I just write it, I won’t actually be on it.

  5. Twister says:

    WOW Kelly! Congrats! Big news writing for the cable show! I knew your talent would be found by the larger world. We’ll all be able to say, oh yeah, we knew Kelly when she was just a really big mean dog! Can’t wait for the really big show.
    For now, I’m glad you’re all ours at the shelter to enjoy your trial coverage.
    I didn’t know we’d been infiltrated, thanks for keeping out the riff raff.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      Hai Twister. Honestly it isn’t that big of a deal except for the writing credit. THAT is a big deal. I hope it works out and they like what I write. I will always be here since I’ve decided we are all going to live forever, so as long as there are trials, or I just feel like rambling there will be blog. Yeah we’ve been infiltrated but whatever. Like I said, I’m not playing anymore and if you catch me doing it, give me nudge please.

    • Mama Via says:

      Riff-raff need not apply….

  6. Debbie Young says:

    Agree with all the above as it relates to trying to srgue in cyberspace! And congratulations on the TV show!

  7. Ginger says:

    So glad you’re back. You’re good therapy! I’ve missed you.

  8. Peggi says:

    Awesome news on the show. Congratulations!. Looking forward to your blogs as always, no matter what trial, you make it interesting.

  9. Mama Via says:

    I am so proud of you, Kelly! For so many things…

    Look how you have grown and developed as a writer, a mom, a member of the (somewhat) human race…and as a friend to all of us…(and daughter to me)…Queen of all you Survey…and did I mention WRITER, and real-live JOURNALIST…with fukkin press fuckkin credentials??? Holy shit on a biskit!! I’m so proud, that I’m BUSTIN my buttons…(and no, it’s NOT just cuz I’m FAT!). Congratulations, and break a pencil lead!

    No, there is no “winning” with some…if there is any “winning” involved, it’s that they managed to push one of us into a situation where we lose our temper…to the point that we spout off…I’m not sure why The Goddess created Trolls…perhaps just to test our strength…and, unlike when we were kids…we can’t change to a different school…move to a different district…or discuss it with mom or dad, who would at least call the offender’s parents, the school principal, or the local parish pastor…all of whom would give a dose of shame…mostly because Trolls have no shame.

    These are the same people that bully their own children….steal money or groceries from their parents or grandparents, steal money, supplies or merchandise from their employers after they are forced to get a job, because they were discovered to be welfare cheats…the same people who have children and have no idea who the father is…or purposely get pregnant hoping to “force” the guy into marrying them…they really don’t want the kid…and honestly, they don’t want the man…all they are after is “child support” so they don’t have to drag their raggedy asses out of bed at 7 a.m. to go to that thing called “work”….these are people who use their children as weapons, a way to coerce a spouse into a certain action…or to coerce grandparents into paying for tuition, clothing, lunch money, etc…..these are people…like my biological mother…who don’t care if they drink and do drugs while they are pregnant, think of no one but themselves…

    These Trolls are the most miserable people in the world. I almost feel pity for them, because, no matter what they have, no matter what they are given…it’s never enough….they are giant empty buckets which will never be filled…because they cannot express their frustration at their boss, or spouse, or parent…so, they kick the dog, set the cat on fire, beat their poor children with belts, or whatever they can lay hand to….and they are so filled with the vile stench of hatred and emptiness…they assault people they’ve never met with words. What sad lives they must have…that they must attack strangers to get a sense of self worth. How false and lonely their relationships are, that the only way they feel satisfaction is thru attack…they have false lives and false loves…even if in a house with a dozen people, no one listens to them…their unwarranted and unsolicited attacks are the only attention they receive.

    These are the people who believe that “bad attention” is better than “no attention at all”. The only way they sleep at night, is because they release their frustration as Trolls. They tell themselves (and sometimes one another) that they are “winners” because their retorts were nastier than someone else’s. That is truly the saddest thing ever…that a “win” isn’t something good and positive…something you can share with your best friend, your folks, your lover…you can only share with someone who is a bigger “loser” than you are.

    How sad, lonely and empty these Trolls are…sometimes they are the way they are because they’ve been abandoned by their own parents, or because they’ve done something shameful and they are being “shunned”, some have been abused (physically, psychologically, or emotionally) or used in one way or another…and either they are ashamed to admit the “issues” they carry. Or, perhaps, haven’t ever been offered an opportunity to “work out” the issues. But, from my own experiences and training, I know this: nothing and no one can “help” them…not until they, themselves acknowledge that they are miserable….until they, themselves, ask for “help”…the two best things to do is just what you’ve outlined…ignore and delete…and, if you feel pity or sadness for them, thru whatever means you use, send good vibrations their way, pray for them, or just wish them the best…

    All of us here have had our struggles…many of them similar…we cannot allow our OWN mental, physical and emotional “okay-ness”, sacrifice our hard work to find and live happy lives by answering hateful Troll-grams, meant not to lift us up…but to bring us down,,,to unleash that big black dog that we fight.

    If any of you feel pressed to answer some Troll-gram…don’t…I stead, write to Kelly or me, or someone you trust….tell us what you are feeling…lets work thru it here at the no-kill shelter…walk the higher ground…keep your “okay” intact…don’t let mere words…written by someone you’ve never met…drag you down into the swamp of self-hatred…

    I love each of you…if you don’t have my email, or Kelly’s…let us know…we are all here to help one another. To love and support one another.

    • Margo B says:

      Such a wonderful post! Thank you for this, it’s beautiful. 🙂 ❤

      • Mama Via says:

        Thank you, dear Margo…I know the frustration I feel after “getting my fur petted backward”…this was experience talking…I ranted to kelly, and as always she listened…she helped me regain a hold on my frustration and my anger…after we chatted, back and forth, for s while…I saw the folly of my answer, written while frustrated…I saw better what the true situation was….

        There is a person in my family (that I no longer talk to) who has some of these “issues”…the difference between him and an online Troll is that he likes to “egg on” anger and frustration…he enjoys actually WATCHING his family get frustrated and angry. It’s the only time that he ever feels that he is “in control”. He mocks, taunts and acts out only to watch others react. He drops in, unannounced, when he is bored…and he stirs the cow pies until they stink to high heaven…. But inevitably, his actions cause people to withdraw, or abandon their relationship…which then allows him to wear the cloak of “victim”, to gain sympathy from those “new” in his life.

        What a sad life! He is stuck in this “game”… He has left a long trail of “bodies” in his wake… He claims that All of his woes are the work of someone else, he cannot see his own contribution…and until he accepts responsibility for the life he has built, he is condemned to continue playing the same game with himself….how very tragic….(I’m sure that if he ever attempted to get online, he would be a Troll!). He is at an age now, that only something very catastrophic will convince him to stop the “game” he plays. He is toxic to me, and to my life…so has become “persona non grata”… I won’t allow him to poison my life. It’s enough that he has destroyed his own life, and those of his children…and the torch is passed to the next generation….

        Take care, Margo…we are always just a comment away…if you need us

  10. Trudy says:

    Might be a good place to article the idea I sent you a message on twitter about Chism

  11. TrulyUSA says:

    Woot Woot!!!! Kelly I’m so happy for you – what a great opportunity for you and you deserve it so much! I have no doubt this is the first step on a new journey for you and I am just about beside myself! Exciting stuff! And for the trolls, yes it is best to ignore them and send them into internet oblivion — they do not live in our world unless we allow them to. Mama is right, they are mean, spiteful, hateful people who try to bring others down and manipulate those around them to do bad instead of good and that is NOT the no-kill shelter I know and love. There is nothing happy, beautiful, loving or good about their tactics, which produce only ugliness and pain. Pffft! They no longer exist — wasn’t that easy peasey? Time wounds all heels! Looking forward to the new trials and your special brand of writing, Kelly. Can I get another Woot Woot!?!!

  12. Constance says:

    Kelly,
    Congratulations on getting the writing credits! It is indeed a big deal:)

    Mama,
    My brother is a troll. After 5 happy and successful years blogging every day and some great loyal cyber friends (I was getting up to 70 comments a day on some posts), he managed to stalk me to such an extent that I now no longer blog.

    He was successful in ruining it for me, and does everything he can in day to day life to do the same.
    Some people, like you said, are just miserable and their only sense of self worth comes form attacking others. Ugh.

    Tis better to light a candle than curse the darkness.
    I agree and still do not know how to deal with trolls. Ignoring them is most effective. It just doesn’t stop them from existing or continuing what they do.

    If i had one wish that would most definitely be fulfilled, it would be that ignorance everywhere would be replaced with emotional intelligence and the kindness that comes with it.

    • Mama Via says:

      Constance, if ALL people were “nice” we would probably die of diabetes! There have to be “all kinds” so that we have the opportunity to not just understand humans, but more importantly, learn compassion and discretion. An example: we really did not understand about the “no, no, HOT!” that our mothers called to us. We understood “HOT!!” SO much better when we touched that red-hot stove coil ourselves, didn’t we?

      Another truth is that people you don’t know cannot hurt you with things they say HALF as much as a family member can. Integral to the emotion of “Love” is “Trust”. You trusted your brother to not hurt you. We give our parents, siblings, children, etc., the ability to harm us emotionally, and it is the most difficult thing in the world to “turn off” your emotions, or to close your heart.

      My biological mother, (as you may remember) abandoned my sister and I, left us in a trailer, not caring if we died or not…(I hadn’t even turned two!)…she wanted what she wanted, and did not care what effect her actions had on others. It took me close to 55 years of life to FINALLY and COMPLETELY close the doors of communication between us. I haven’t talked to her for 10 years, and I’ve vowed that the doors between us have stayed closed. She’s had hundreds of “chances”…there will be no more. I refuse to allow her to ruin all of the wonderful things I have in my life now.

      I am very sorry that your brother silenced your voice. That is a shameful thing to have done. And, it just doesn’t seem enough to say “he is a miserable person”, does it? Intellectually, we can say “I won’t open the door, and allow this person to hurt me any more!”…SAYING that is SO easy…emotionally, it is very difficult to close your heart. Certainly, most people want to FEEL loved…especially by their families…feelings of rejection are not easy to accept….those “cuts” are the deepest…

      All of us here send you “good vibrations” and love. I’m praying that one day, your brother will be healed of whatever pain he carries that makes him want to make you miserable, or hurt you. Stay strong, Constance…one day, when you are strong again, you will blog again! Sending healing love…mama

      • Constance says:

        Thank you Mama. Much appreciated…

        Your Mother was a biological parent only, not in any way, shape, or form a parent of the heart. I am so hugely sorry all over again for what you endured.
        Glad that you have done no contact with her for the last 10 years, and will keep the doors closed. That is the wisdom of being healthily loving to yourself. ((hugs))

      • Mama Via says:

        I don’t need to tell you, obviously…but will repeat wisdom of the ages anyway…”you can’t love anyone unless you love yourself first.” (And I don’t mean in a selfish narcissistic way…).

        I asked a pastor that I knew well, about the commandment to “love and honor your parents”…his answer helped me greatly, because I allowed myself to feel “guilt” about not “loving and honoring” my parents…he told me that it was required to “love/honor PARENTS, not sperm/egg donors.” He said that my bio mother did nothing more than a turtle might do (lay an egg), or an octopus, who lays it’s eggs, but leaves (dies) after the eggs hatch. PARENTS love and sacrifice…he told me a story about that he believed his mom REALLY DID like her breakfast toast burnt every morning…but later found out that it was her “loving sacrifice”…during the depression, a slice of toast wasn’t thrown away…”Mom” always ate the burnt slice, and gave the nicely toasted slices to him and his father.

        He explained that the commandment didn’t necessarily apply to biological parents…men who molest their children, or beat them to black and blue, and women who neglect or abandon their children haven’t earned honor and respect. This applies to siblings as well. I broke all ties with my step-brother at some point in the 70s I think. He molested me when I was only 5 years old. (He also molested his own step-daughter!). When I learned that he died back in 2008, I celebrated his death. He was only 60, but I was happy that he would no longer be a threat to any little girl again! If there IS a HELL, I pray that he is there, suffering! That he died alone, with no family…not me, not his ONLY child (a daughter), not even his ex-wife would claim his body….I believe that is the most horrible way to check out of life…with no one loving you, caring enough about you…but, it was what he earned, certainly it is what he deserved.

        I hope that your own brother eventually sees what his actions are doing. I send prayers that your relationship with him grows into the kind of love I shared with my dear sister…before it’s too late.

  13. Lori says:

    Yay you’re back. I’ve been watching vancallis. I’m also watching Michelle Anderson trial, the carnation murders. It’s live streamed for now and Paul sanders is in the court everyday. Absolutely gruesome murder of 4 adults and 2 small children.
    I haven’t been here for a while cause my mom passed away 2 weeks ago and I’m trying to figure out how to cope with that. We were very close

    • Constance says:

      There is no real way to cope with loss like that this soon after it has occurred… Just enduring it at this stage is hard enough. My empathy, Lori.

      • TrulyUSA says:

        Lori, so sorry about your loss. It sounds like you had a wonderful mother. You are very fortunate. I’d like to say it gets easier, but really, you just become accustomed to the hole in your heart. Take care of yourself and treasure the memories.

    • Mama Via says:

      Lori, you have my sincere condolences….I had a very close relationship with my sister, and when she was killed, my world fell apart. I confess to being a bit envious of you having a close relationship with your mother…how wonderful that you and your mother shared love!

      I’ve told my son that there is no way he can “understand the feelings a parent has, the love a parent feels, until he raises child of his own.” So, I suppose that I cannot really feel all of your loss..because I’ve never really had a “Mom” (but I had my Gramma, who raised me for many years, so I know the pain of losing the best Gramma in the world!).

      MamaVia’s Rules of the Universe state that “you will never hurt more than you loved”…the amount of pain you feel when you lose a loved one is directly connected to the amount of love you shared. If you hadn’t loved your Mom so greatly, you wouldn’t miss her as much as you do, so, in a way, the pain is good…it helps you acknowledge the depth of your love.

      The pain and sadness will never go away…but, with time, the pain will ease, the sadness not visit you as often. Take comfort that all of us at the no-kill shelter are available anytime you need a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold or just someone who “understands”.

      Take care of yourself….you are in our prayers…you will find your own way of coping with the loss, dear.

  14. Well far OUT girl! Congrats! I just hope you are able to keep this blog up and running. Dont spread yourself too thin!

    You hear abt that new syfy show “The internet Ruined My Life”? I’m gonna make a million dollars selling signed limited edition posters that read “Just turn the damned thing OFF”! Its an extra fifty for me to personalize it with “You IDIOT!”. 😉

    *flicks tail*

    • TrulyUSA says:

      Pesky, I just love your stuff! Just wanted to tell you that!

    • Mama Via says:

      I want the personalized one….if not for myself…then for several million of my very best friends…shall I start in alphabetical order?

      Love your stuff, Pesky!

    • Constance says:

      PeskyV,
      Exactly!!! In fact, you’ll easily make more than a million as there are at least a billion idiots who fail to understand not turning the thing on in the first place.

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