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Cat Bites Really Big Mean Dog.

April 28, 2016

Hello my lovelies. It is me, your Dean of Fuckery/Law Professor/resident sarcasm expert/honorary DVM/and Queen of all I survey. I have a bunch of stuff to talk about and then we shall get to the title of today’s post.

Firstly, has America collectively lost its mind? I think so. Exhibit everything: Donald Trump. I listened to him go on and on about his plans to blow the middle east back to the stone age last night and how he planned on making China the greatest financial power in the world and how he was putting a metaphorical wall around America and my prevailing thought was “good luck with that.” Unfortunately it was quickly followed by “Holy fuck, we are an attached land mass and when he starts world war III, and he will, we may be somewhat fucked.” Why do more people not realize that Donald Trump is a Whackadoo? My only comfort is that when some country he is bombing releases some weird biological weapon I might finally get my zombie apocalypse. I am prepared. And looking forward to putting something metal into the brains of several undead people. I think my invisible psychiatrist would agree it would be good therapy. As a bonus you can’t murder something that is already dead, not that there will be anyone to worry about it. I plan on taking over the local jail as my first safe house.

Here in Canada Senator Mike Duffy was acquitted of using tax dollars improperly, the parents of a child that died of meningitis were convicted for not seeking medical attention and they are pretty pissed off about it the poor muffins. I am pretty pissed off another child died because there aren’t mandatory licensing requirements to have a child. The trial for the Murder of Tim Bosma continues and this week we learned that General sick fuck Millard asked his ex to tamper with a witness. Private sick fucks ex has also given testimony against him regarding the livestock incinerator that Tim was burned in among other charming things. I’m guessing since at least private sick fucks ex girlfriend is an accessory after the fact she made herself a deal although I haven’t heard one way or the other. Jian Ghomeshi part two, the next complainant is coming to a courtroom near some of us right shortly and in Edmonton 22 schools were put on lockdown because someone reported a man with a gun in his townhouse. IN HIS OWN TOWNHOUSE. Police located the man about 2 and a half hours later but never did locate any guns. 22 schools worth of freaked out kids and parents because  a man might have been seen in his own house with a gun. Thanks America.

Now to the title. So I came across a very pregnant feral cat. Since I cannot stand the suffering of animals I went and got her some food and was going to try and catch her so she could have her babies inside the garage and I could find them homes. I never got the chance however cuz bitch went all psycho kitty on me and bit me before I ever realized what had happened. she then ate the food and promptly fucked off for parts unknown. Since she had sunk her fangs in right down to the bone in at least one spot I figured I better go get some antibiotics at the hospital. I got triaged and the nurse asked on a scale of one to ten what was my pain level and I said negative 62 because it didn’t hurt at all, I figured no big deal.  She laughed like a hyena and said nobody had ever given her negative pain number before.  I laughed back and told her to look up my file and she’d understand.   I knew because it was a cat I needed antibiotics and probably rabies shots. The nurse that took me back said I would need them but the doctor who either thinks he is really funny, or just didn’t know how to tell me I had to have rabies shots said he had to go look it up. He called the health unit and that is when a stupid cat bite turned into a thing. He came back and said I did indeed need rabies shots which I find absolutely hilarious; I mean how many times have I been accused of having rabies? It is completely hysterical. Anyway the health unit called me this morning but then passed me off to the health unit where my doctors office is because my doctor has to give me the shots. Which sucks but is still seriously funny. They made me an appointment for Monday but then I got a panicked phone call 20 minutes later saying I couldn’t wait till Monday and I have to go tomorrow. Tomorrow is day zero, or day fuck my life depending on how you look at it. Five vials of immunoglobulin at the site of the bite which is directly at the base of my first finger and the meat of the pad underneath.  For those of you that don’t know I am seriously needle phobic and needles in the hand suck serious amounts of ass.  Monday I go back for my first dose of rabies vaccine, then Friday for my second dose, then the following Friday for dose three and then the 28th for my last shot. And then I can get bit by whatever I want because I am rabies immune for life. YAY. So the Really Big Mean Dog is finally getting her rabies shots. OMGLOLROFLMAO.

That’s it for tonight lovelies, I will keep you apprised as to whether I get put into 10 day quarantine or not. *snort*

RBMD peacing the fuck out.

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House Update #2–and other stuff

April 28, 2016

Just to keep you entertained until Kelly feels better–we will do a house update!  YEA!!

Well, I went to the house last Sunday…from the outside, it didn’t look like they had accomplished much!  But…once I got inside, it was a different matter, entirely!!
 
All that wood laying around is our siding!  I saw Brad..Brad is one of the three partners who own MasterCraft, and, interestingly, he owns the home just two doors down from us!  Brad is in charge of the building of the pool.  He told me that he had the permit…and as soon as the siding was on the house, he would start the pool…so, maybe that happened this week!
 
This is inside the garage–as you can see, all of the drywall has been hung.  This door goes out to the side of the house.  The home we live in now, the only place to keep the garbage can and recycle bin is IN the garage…which I HATE!!! With THIS house, there’s a great hiding place along the side of the house to put the garbage cans, so I had them pour some extra concrete for a “pad” to keep the garbage outside where it belongs!  This door is right near the “Garbage Pad”.
 
This is the “Family Room”…the “Dining Nook” is to the right hand side.  You can just make out where the concrete ends–that’s where the covered patio ends too…then the pool is just beyond that…to the left is the “ventless” gas fireplace.
 
Here is the fireplace.  The arched door to the right is the MasterBedroom suite, the first door on the left is “Mechanical” (air conditioning equipment, the other is the Foyer closet.  The TV will be installed above the fireplace.  Although you cannot see them in the picture, I had them install “floor outlets” on each side of where the sofa will sit–to keep from having cords all over the place!!
 
In this photo, you can see the arched doorway leading to my husband’s office, the guest room and my studio to the left, the Butlers Pantry, Laundry Room and garages to the right.  There, at what looks like a pony wall is where the kitchen island will be 
 
After coming in front door and through the foyer, a set of French Doors is on the left, leading to this room…currently called “the Billuards Room”.  We will install a window seat below the right window as well as bookcases on each side.  On the right side of this room is a full bath, and we will be installing a small closet.  This room can have a variety of uses, but, right now, it’s the Billuards room!  IF at a later date, we need to hire live-in help, or a nurse, or, God Forbid, need a hospital bed…this room could also serve all of those needs.  You really can’t tell just how HUGE this room is!
 
The Master Suite–this is one of several rooms with a “trey ceiling”, giving the room a 11 foot ceiling, not 10.  Just out of the view finder on the right are a set of French Doors leading directly to the pool.  I just LOVE all the trees we can see in most of the rooms…it makes this house feel very secluded and private!  The closets and master bath are directly behind the camera.
 
 
Do I need to tell you how much I love my New Studio???  Yes, I have a “thing” for French Doors…they let me see the pool better!!  I can already imagine my DH telling me “Go to Your Room and MAKE ART!”  How can you NOT BE creative in this room??  Yes, all of the electrical outlets in this room are “high”–two reasons for that…first, because that height makes it easier for me to reach them without hurting my back…and second because I will be having either beadboard, Shiplap or wainscot in this room.  Additionally, along one wall, I will be adding built-in storage and bookcases and the higher outlets still allow access even with cabinetry!
 
I was standing just inside the covered patio, looking toward my Studio…doesn’t it look wonderful?  The property line for our house runs along a line connecting with the neighbor’s fence…BUT…THEY don’t have a pool like we do…there is a small seasonal creek that runs about 5-10 feet beyond our property line, and the grade is pretty steep–therefore, we are having a retaining wall built that will make our yard FLAT (more or less) rather than sloping, like the neighbor’s do.  This will help with the erosion…and keep the land stable behind our pool.
  
This is another view of the covered patio–the French doors going out to the pool area.  Every time I go to the new house, it just makes me feel so good…I feel like the house is “hugging” me….it seems to promise me that my DH and I will have many happy years here together.  I had a “gal-pal” in California who was nothing but a gold-digger…she had the most wonderful husband…he was a bonafide war hero, had saved his platoon while placing himself in harms way,,,yet, he never talked about himself…one day while visiting her…they got into a HUGE fight about him giving some money to his daughter…now. Mind you, she had a diamond ring the size of a headlight, a Jaguar, a huge, beautiful home in a tony part of town, designer clothing and Chanel handbags…yet…after he walked out of the room, she hissed “I wish that he would just DIE!!”  Several months later, a deer jumped in front of his SUV, he swerved to avoid it and hit a tree…he was deader than dead….I’ve often wondered if she ever felt guilt for wishing him dead…I know I would have!!!  She was motivated only by “filthy lucre”…this house would only be four walls to keep out the heat and cold, a roof to keep the rain off me, without my DH…we’ve been working on this house since November 15, and we have yet to have a disagreement about ANYTHING!!  Our tastes and ideas are similar, and anything that we aren’t exactly alike, we’ve discussed calmly and then made a decision…no winners, no losers…  I bought him a set of Waterford Crystal martini glasses as a “housewarming gift”…He has 2 martinis every night…no, not because he NEEDS them to be able to stand being with me…(although I HAVE heard some people say “if you gotta be married, you gotta have martinis”)…he started having two martinis every night LONG before he ever met ME!!  My DH will be 73 this year, he still goes to the office every day…because he loves his job…because he loves helping people, because he likes helping communities offer a better quality of life.  Even so, there can be stressful days…so, all he wants when he gets home is a few drinks and some quiet time to unwind.  When he comes in the door, I have his drink ready, and a few snacks…and he watches his favorite program on TV….he asks only for that 45 minutes to an hour of “quiet time”…so, I make us dinner, and give him time to unwind….it seems like the more I do to ease his life…the more that I take responsibility for the “small things” that are so pesky that they disrupt his day, the happier he is…and I like it when he is happy.  I guess he feels the same way…because he does “little things” that make my life better…I’ve never met anyone more considerate, kind and generous…and by generous, I don’t necessarily mean financially…he is generous with himself…he LISTENS to me, he values my ideas and my thoughts…and he RESPECTS me..respects my thoughts and feelings.  I cannot imagine how lost I would be without him.  If I had one wish (other than for my DH and I to have long, healthy and happy years together) it would be for all of you, my friends to have the type of loving happiness that my DH and I share.  The house is wonderful and beautiful…but, in truth, it is icing on the cake…I have the kind of love, the kind of husband that I dreamed of having when I was a young lady, after just discovering boys exist!!!  Everything I have endured in life was worth every step…because each step brought me to this very moment in time…and I don’t want to ever discover how horrible life would be without my DH…I feel the same way about all of you ladies…I’m grateful and fortunate to love and be loved by each of you…you’ve each enriched my life as no one else could, and I’m grateful for your loving friendships.

House Update!! (And other stuff!)

April 19, 2016

Other stuff first, I guess–

Ok–Lyrica hates me…it tried to kill me…but we called a truce…..
GABAPENTIN hates me–tried to kill me and almost made me do an impression of a water balloon–we called a truce….
My mammographer loves me–gave me a clean bill of health–with the exception of my genetic “fibro-cystic breasts”
My mammo/sonographer also loves me–ditto on “clean bill of health”/”fibro-cystic breasts” and, yes, lymph glands are “okey-dokey”! (Yea!)
Will see if my blood loves me tomorrow–or not….I’m betting that Rheumatoid Arthritis and Lupus tests will be negative–no family history
On the OTHER hand—-all three of my father’s sisters have Fibromyalgia….my mother’s sister has had fibromyalgia since before it became a thing that was clinically diagnosed. (And, no, I did NOT ask the egg-donor–she would tell me the sky is pink and raining orange bubbles, if, in the warped world she lives in, the answer would get her some attention–times a thousand if the question came from a human with testosterone and a penis! So, anything SHE.has to say has no intrinsic value!  (I have YET to discover exactly WHY so MANY old, horse-faced women feel that they must LIE to get attention….or WHY what they see in the mirror doesn’t match reality…but, sadly, it is the truth.  The disease starts kicking in when they get close to 40, and by the time they turn 80, the only thing they are good for is being ground up for fish food….it is that intervening 40 years, when they clop-clop-CLOP around on all fours, neighing and whinnying and generally making horse patooties of themselves that make them so difficult to tolerate.  My poor horse-faced egg-donor…Queen of the Horse-Face Girls!)
Last note–I’m thinking of starting a group of ladies interested in the 2016 elections!  I haven’t really thought out all of the rules for membership…but, I HAVE thought of a name!  Politically Interested Girls (PIGs)   If you know of anyone who is active in the 2016 Election, and is a PIG…just let me know….and I might decide that this is a viable group!  And, like any POLITICAL group, Waffle-era, Flip-Flop-ers and Big, Fat Fibbers are given a complimentary membership!!
Ok…to the good part!!!  HOUSE UPDATE!!!!
As you can see from the following photos….Windows and doors are installed…after these photos, the insulation was put in, sliding glass door installed and some interior doors were hung.  This week, they are putting the siding on the house and hanging the drywall!!  The pool permit was issued, so next group of photos just may have a SWIMMIN HOLE!!
Love to all of you!!  
Front of house–
I
Rear of house
Interior of house
My studio
That’s all!!  More next week!!

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