House Update-Final Chapter

July 31, 2016

Well, at least the “semi-final” chapter!  We close on Friday, just 5 days from now…and only a few “minor” items remain to be done: painting the garage doors, installing the freezer and the oven, the final paint touch ups throughout, etc…so, without further ado, I present: Casa Azul…

At the foyer; looking into the Family Room, immediate left is the Billiards Room, immediate right is the Formal Dining Room, ahead and to the left, the Master Suite, straight ahead, the patio & pool,  ahead and right, the Dining Nook, Kitchen, ahead, to the right and down the hall, Butlers pantry, Drop Zone and laundry and to the right and down the left hall, DH’s office, Guest Suite and my Studio.
billiards Room
Formal Dining Room
Dining Nook
Gas Fireplace in Great Room
Master Suite
Master Suite Bath
Laundry Room & Mechanical
Drop Zone
Guest Suite
Guest Suite Bath
My Studio
Back yard–Left
Back Yard, Right

Boo “helping”

Well….that’s the end for now, ladies….I won’t make you suffer thru my interior design troubles….we are very happy with the final result…and I know we will have many happy years living in our beautiful home!  Thanks for your support and comments throughout the process!!

Risk: The Game Of World Domination. Real World Edition

July 21, 2016

Hi kiddies, tis me your wayward queen back from hiding in my bunker because the GOP election thing is happening and I’m ascared.

college humor wrote this, I take no credit because unlike whatever the fuck number wife we are on, I try not to just poach stuff like entire speeches.

So, just for the shits and giggles of it all (spoiler alert I hope you saved your complimentary Pretoria puke buckets) lets recap shall we?

Donald  Trump (real name Drumph according to John Oliver) thinks all people of Latino origin, ESPECIALLY MEXICANS are murdering rapist drug cartel running bastards.  Except for a couple which he assumes are okay.  I’m thinking probably his gardener and pool guy.  All as in every single Muslim is a terrorist and need to be deported back to the stone age as soon as we can round up enough planes.  Born in America, tough shit deal with it.  Women fall into three categories, the blow up dolls like his wife, the mildly cuddly and the way gross fat ones that need to be exiled until we figure out what the fuck is wrong with them.  Oh sorry forgot the forth category, the ones bleeding from….wherever.

He is planning on building a wall around Mexico. Um, excuse me for a moment (OMGLOLROFLMAO) and wait cuz it gets better, Mexico is going to pay for it.  He does have the distinction of actually making a foreign dignitary curse in a second language no less to tell him they are not paying for a fucking wall, so 2 points to Slitherin.

This brings us to NATO. NATO or the North Atlantic Treaty Organization was brought together in 1949 because WWII happened. Members include Canada, Britain, a bunch of European countries I’m to lazy to go look up, Russia briefly in 91 but they quit because world domination, Poland, the Czech republic and the US, at least until the orangutan that speaks becomes president. He doesn’t like Nato, he doesn’t think countries are equal in costs to upkeep Nato, he is an idiot. Putin is probably throwing a huge party and planning his overthrow of the US right now because if you don’t think all the NATO countries are going to tell Trump to eat a dick, you are not paying attention.

In case you were wondering, Canada is starting a go fund me to build our own fucking wall and we will pay for it ourselves because we all had a meeting and decided that the states has just gone batshit crazy. It’s not your fault. I blame the 1%, the people who think you need an automatic weapon for anything other than when the purge starts and I’m sure it’s not too far off. Why the fuck does anyone need an assault rifle? Home protection? Blow me, if you can’t shoot someone with a 12 gauge or a 45 you shouldn’t even be holding a gun. Going hunting deer with it? That is just sick. Climbing a clocktower? you’re better of with a carbine…not that I would know. People are shooting cops as a sport, so I’m not kidding about the purge.

Don’t worry, we are working hard to get the normal Americans out. We have re-activated the underground railroad. Go to Georgia if you can get there without getting shot, wait until dark and watch for the old timey lantern. Go to it and the conductor will give you further instructions.

I leave you with this because it just reminds me of all of this mess.

RBMD peacing the fuck out!!

EDIT: Renae is correct, Russia is not part of NATO at this time

House Update #5

July 10, 2016

Hi, everyone!  Yes, I am feeling better…I’m not 100%…YET…but I WILL BE!

Here is the “Progress Report”….in MY (humble) opinion…the house is even more beautiful than it was at the last visit!  To get the entire hous into the viewfinder, it seems that I need to step across the street and back into lot 53…I will figure out how to do it on my next visit…maybe….m the pavers driveway looks really wonderful…that drive will last longer than the years that Papa and I have left!
For the most part, there was no activity INside the house…all the work this week took place in the yard.  This is the “California Room” just outside the Great Room sliding glass doors.  You can see they have the “Pavers on the concrete” installed…
The paver patio is close to complete…just need to “sand it”…which consists of sweeping sand into the spaces between the bricks, which acts as a “mortar”.  I think it looks wonderful…very happy with it.  You can just barely see the cobalt tiles set at what will be the “waterline”. Once the pool is filled with water…the blue water will really make it all “Pop”!!
Here we go…this is the “overall effect”….once the sod is put down, there will be some “contrast”….
It’s interesting, watching the patterns of the tree shadows changing throughout the day….if I remember correctly, this photo is taken looking almost “East”…the house is oriented North NorthEast….so, the majority of the afternoon sunshine tends to beat down on the front of the house; the garage and dining room and billiards room.  For FLORIDA, this is perfect…the trees act as a wind break for the North Wind in what little “winter” we have….and the trees and house give plenty of “shade” during the “Dog Days” of Summer!  Funny…how “short” my 6 foot plus son appears to be in this photo…those 10-11 foot ceilings tend to make everyone short!!
Well…that’s all of my “First World Problems” today, ladies….a few insignificant items were completed at the house….the cooktop, dishwasher and vent hood were all installed….oh, and the chandlier in the dining nook was installed….they also finished “sanding” the back patio and pool deck….it looks very nice.  We have the “punch list walk thru” scheduled for the 27th….and the final walk thru on August 5th at 1 o’clock, and closing at 2 o’clock.  (Pretty sure of themselves, huh?). I expect the next set of photos to have a fence and some sod….maybe a few trees….I’m starting to get excited…I can hardly wait to get over!
Love to all….Live Long and Live Well…

Hi, Everyone!!! A Note from MamaVia

July 5, 2016

Hi!!!  Mama here…more or less…on the 22nd, Papa kidnapped me from the sofa and forced me to get on a plane full of people with GERMS…and we flew into Billings, Montana….then drove to Sheridan, Wyoming.  Papa seems to think that although I was BORN in WASHINGTON STATE, grew up in SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA, and lived 12 years in SAN ANTONIO….(with 6 months of “hard time” at Lowry AFB, Colorado) that I hadn’t seen “the real west”…trust me…I saw what I wanted to see….Indians?  There’s Indians in Washington State….and California….mountains?  There’s mountains in both states…and some called “Hills” in Texas…so… MY CONSIDERED OPINION….I HAD MISSED NOTHING!!!  I once drove to Mount Rushmore….and the Crazy Horse Monument….it’s not like I am a sheltered traveler….but….to keep everything happy…I dragged my raggedy ass off the sofa, sent Boo to Brenda’s house, threw some of my skorts into a paper bag and off we went…SIGH……….

Thursday, the 23rd…I woke up with a sore throat…oh, lovely…so, went to the pharmacy, got some cold-ease and hoped I wouldn’t get sick…clambered into the rented Subaru Outback and my “chauffeur” drove me up the crookedest derned road I’ve ever been on…nothing but rock…oh, look at the rocks…oh, look at that rock!  Needless to say….I got car sick…grabbed my pillow, got in the backseat, and went to sleep…my head wedged against one door, my feet propped against the other…hoping that the Great Indian, “Falling Rocks” wasn’t going to attack the Outback…

Met my husband’s “friend”….a short ugly little man….a cross between a troll and a leprechaun…obviously a heavy drinker from the florid face, bulbous nose and BIG MOUTH.  A MYSOGYNIST….whose wife adores him…he is HUGE into guns, prepping, himself, drinking and generally being an asshole….I cannot stand him…he is an authentic “Florida Cracker” and proud of it.  How he found such a wonderful, caring, considerate wife, I’ll never know… husband drinks too much when he is around Cracker….and I don’t like that, either.

I’m not really sure when I got sick…but I can barely remember the 6 days we were gone.  All I wanted to do was to come home.  Somewhere about the 24th or 25th….I can actually FEEL the crap in my lungs “crackling”…I can BARELY breathe….my dearest insisted we go to “Buffalo”…where all he did was sit on a park bench under a tree on the street…(I called my doc at home & made an appointment on the 29th)..we didn’t shop, we didn’t walk (who could walk with all that crackling and out of breath stuff?). We went with Cracker & Wife for dinner…I don’t remember eating, or talking or even where we went.  I couldn’t breathe…at some point, we went shopping…my DH purchased a pair of cowboy boots for me (why?  I don’t know!) and a hat….the boots didn’t really look at that “hot” with my skorts!  I began thinking I needed to go to the emergency room…I couldn’t breathe…I wanted to go home….FINALLY….the 28th!!  Up at 2am for the two hour drive back to Billings…yes, I slept in the back…airport at 4 am, turn in the rental, go thru security….sit around to finally get on the plane…I still can’t breathe (do you see the theme, here?). FINALLY….home at 5:30 Eastern…go get the dog at 7…home by 8….(thank you, son, for driving me…). I fell asleep exhausted…

By the time I got to my doc on the 29th, I was barely alive….my fingertips were bluish, my ankles are so swollen that I feel the water “sloshing” with every step….I can’t “let water” at all…I’m struggling for every breath…the receptionist was so shocked at my presentation, she forget to collect her co-pay…I’m put into a room with no weigh in, no blood pressure check…and, suddenly, it’s like a scene from E.R….Dr. Browning is shouting for Epi-shots and steroids and giving instructions…several nurses are preparing shots and breathing machines and putting monitors in me…my oxygen concentration at 75% has everyone going nuts…

Finally…the Epi and steroids kick in…and my oxygen gets up to 82%…maybe I will live after all…finally, after another hour of breathing treatments…I’m up to almost 91%…and they send me for some prescriptions and “bed rest”…I was ordered to go get a lung X-Ray….diagnosis: Community Acquired Pnemonia and COPD….last X-ray, several years ago, showed a spot on my right lung…we will see if it has grown any larger…or if, as I suspect, it’s just some scar tissue from my many bouts of Pnemonia and chronic bronchitis…all is well….

House Update:

Nothing much “substantial” has happened this month…the paint is done….


And….the paver driveway, sidewalk and porch are done…


The “waterline tiles” are installed in the pool….


The chandeliers are installed….


The cabinets and cabinet lighting completed….


And…my soaker tub is close to complete….


I’m so sick of waiting for everyone to get off their thumbs and get this house done!!!  We’ve been dealing with this since mid November…and I’m pretty sick of those men not getting anything done!!!  What SHOULD take a day, takes a week…what SHOULD take a week, takes a month…several weeks ago, I would have given this builder 5 stars…please don’t ask for a reference until after they quit piddling around and get this house done!!!  Maybe it’s like being pregnant…the last month is the worst for waiting…

I’ll let y’all know about the X-Ray when I get the results…I hope everyone is well…

Love, mama

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