NOTE: I WROTE THIS BEFORE I GOT INTO A BIT A THING ABOUT MY .COM RENEWAL. IT’S SORTED AND I WIN SO…YAY ME!! ANYWAY POINT IS IT IS OLDER NEWS AND I’M TO FUCKING LAZY TO GO AND CHANGE TENSES SO IF IT SAYS TODAY TAKE THAT AS ABOUT THREE WEEKS AGO…ISH. WITH THAT ON WITH THE SHOW.
Hello everyone. Your wayward Queen is back with stuff to say. Before we get into the amusing part of the program, I would like to dedicate this post to the Tragically Hip and specifically their lead singer Gord Downie. Gord has been the frontman for the hip since before they ever had a record deal. His voice is what I think angels sound like and he is a true inspiration to everyone battling anything. Gord has inoperable brain cancer. He is dying. Instead of just lying down and waiting for the inevitable, Gord decided that he was going out the way he wanted and what he wanted was one more tour to thank the fans.
I first saw the Hip when I was 19. I had taken one of my I have no idea where I am going to end up weekend road trips and I wound up right around Kingston and camped for the night. I decided to check out a bar about a half hour up the road and they had a live band. The band was phenominal. They did mostly covers and a couple of originals and played to about 10 people counting me. Even with nobody in the audience they gave it everything they had, played a full set and I was hooked by the second song. I saw them twice more after they had become big and own every album they have ever put out. They are not the best band in the world, but they are definitely the most Canadian band in the world. They never cared about world fame even if the attain a modicum of it, they just wanted to make good music about things relevant to Candians. And they did that in spades.
Gonna get right into the meat and taters of todays post before another fit of laughter keels me over.
I know you all in the States think you have the market cornered on weapon violence, but I will have you know you are absolutely right, but that doesn’t make this any less funny.
Today in Toronto a crazed Bowman(Have to check and see if that is a thing, not really sure)killed three and injured one in a crazy crossbow attack.
Now, of course dead people are never funny. Wait…anyway the thing that is funny is that anybody can legally obtain a crossbow. kind of like you all and guns in the States. Call it the Canadian second amendment or, the right to carry bows. All kinds of bows. Cross bows, long bows, recurve bows, camouflage bows. The difference between say a 45 and a bow is, bows are a fucking pain in the ass to re-load. If you are small it can take upwards of five minutes to reload. Also, you need to be a much better shot to use a bow. If you don’t believe me ask Daryl Dixon he’ll tell you. After about the fourth shot your arms are too tired to reload anymore and this is my theory as to why the rampage (which was actually three people bowed down (see what I did there)at close range in their driveway and some random person.) The survivor probably survived because the crossbow wielding maniacs arms were tired and he wobbled.
There have been crossbow hunting accidents and a dog up here shot his owner once but that was with a rifle, but I can’t remember any crossbow attacks. We had that dude that cut somebodies head off on a bus but that was with a hunting knife and he was batshit nuts so it wasn’t really his fault but no, cross bow attacks not so much.
Think I will google crossbow attacks in Canada and get back to you.
So, at the risk of people not having a sense of humor, lets talk about your election because nothing is more fun than talks about politics or religion. I feel for you all and because of that I have to feel bad for Canada. If Justin ever loses his hair it will be over the American election. Your Candidates both suck. Trump is just a whack a doo and I think Clinton is just slimy.
I love Trumps thoughts though, | may have to turn the in house psychic loose on him, although she has threatened suicide if I do. How is this man ballsy enough to talk about how he knows more about ISIS then anyone else and how he is going to run the country like a business. Is he so full of his own bullshit that he thinks nobody knows how many times his business skills have put his businesses into chapter 11. Can a country file for bankruptcy? Someone better look that up. He is getting rid of all the illegal immigrants to bring them back but legally? How fucking much is that going to cost and more importantly why the fuck would you do that? Then he flipped and decided they could stay if they paid back taxes. I find that confusing. I don’t really understand how illegal immigrants work unless it is under the table, off the books like, so how can you charge them back taxes on money they technically never made? And if they are on the books they aren’t illegal right? They must have a work visa or something. I am also looking forward to Trump getting privileged 1st worlders to do the jobs that the illegal immigrants do. Is he going to make it mandatory to do farm work or clean houses or garden or whatever it is that Americans don’t want to do that makes people in poor countries flock there to get jobs?
Hell, you can’t get farm workers here. We have to import them. We actually request them. That way they are vetted, they are on the books, they are treated like humans instead of farm animals, the have access to medical while they are here, they pay taxes on the money they make and it is still a shit ton more money then they make at home. Some farms have had the same gangs of Mexicans or Jamaicans for over 10 years. Because Canadians don’t want the jobs. How it works in the states I don’t know, but here the jobs have to be posted at services Canada and offered to Canadians first. The farmers I have known have told me they maybe get two or three applicants for forty or more jobs and when they are hired they usually only last a couple of days. Farm work is hard and long and hot. You work in the sun, in the rain, etc. So don’t be so quick to think getting rid of your immigrants is going to accomplish anything, it may actually cause more problems than it fixes.
As for Clinton, I don’t think she is a much better choice, just for different reasons. I find her disingenuous. And Bill Clinton is going to be the ugliest first lady ever. Looking forward to seeing his inaugural dress though.
I say you write in Rick Grimms/Daryl Dixon and see if they win. Or vote for your cat. Or Mama. Mama would make a kick ass president.
That is it
REALLY BIG MEAN DOG PEACING THE FUCK OUT!