Hai my lovelies. Tis me, your intrepid Dean of Fuckery, Law Professor, Doctor of Doctoring, honorary Judge, Puppy resuscitation expert, Dog Lactation consultant, Horse Whisperer, Owner of the In House Psychic, Alternative news (see real news) supporter, Big Fan of Human Rights and the US constitution, and Queen of all I survey.
The video of the day is brought to you with Russian subtitles so you can get used to Cyrillic writing and shit.
I am so excited for New Korea. Your supreme leader just declared the day of his inauguration 1/20/2017 “National Day of Patriotic Devotion” (seriously). cancelled everyone’s healthcare, killed the TPP, decided that starting a war with the indigenous native population over a pipeline is a really good idea, lied about the turnout for his dictatorshiptorial debut, started a war with the media, decided the secretary of education doesn’t actually require one, gave big businesses huge, or should I say YUUUUGE tax breaks and drained the swamp of whatever was in it and filled it back up with Nile crocodiles with necrotizing fasciitis shooting lasers on their heads. Welcome to 1817 everybody. YAY!!
Someone tell me again how a government led by a guy that has gone bankrupt 11 times and filled with billionaire members is a good idea?
So here is my theory on what is next on the Trump agenda. Deciding that allowing peons to call the white house to complain or ask questions should no longer be allowed because negativity and stuff…Oh,wait he did that already. Black people will once again be required to ride at the back of the bus and they will like it dammit. All Latino’s will be immediately deported. DNA testing will become mandatory at birth so that the Government can make sure you are positively, completely white. Indigenous people must immediately assimilate or be summarily shot. All Muslims will immediately be interred in camps with really nice showers. All women will immediately throw away their shoes and become pregnant, or if too old to become pregnant they will be offered the choice of assisted suicide because their usefulness is over. If you are a millionaire you will get a pardon, as long as you know your place. Spousal rape will be legalized because you can’t rape someone you are married to. Pussy grabbing will be added as an Olympic Sport. Homosexuals will have a chance to pray the gay away and if it doesn’t work they will be interred with the Muslims or offered assisted suicide because the only reason to be alive is to procreate and if you can’t do that you are obsolete.
Your great leader will import every Rottweiler, pitbull, mastiff, and leopard dog from the entire world to help herd the Mexican race back to Mexico. Religion will become mandatory, but the new bible will be the art of the deal and you will worship at the alter of Trump. Since Trump is now a god and church all of his earnings will be non-taxable. All detractors will be arrested and put into chain gangs building that fucking wall. All homes will become property of Trump holdings.
Scientists will be reassigned to jobs that are actually important. If they refuse they will be offered immediate assisted suicide…with a rifle.
The phrase climate change will no longer be allowed to be uttered. Fines will be a minimum of ten thousand dollars for each separate instance. Differently weathered will be an acceptable alternative.
Anyone who cannot afford medical care is now allowed to be seen by a veterinarian if they can afford that. Veterinarians are now will be allowed to perform human procedures if they want too. If they don’t the Supreme leader suggests you hurry up and die.
Barack Hussein Obama shall be removed from all texts, literature, historical references, et al. So let it be written, so let it be done.
Enjoy your new dictatorship kids. Hope it was worth it. The land of the used to be free and the home of the slaves.
RBMD shaking her fucking head and peacing the fuck out.