Your Dean Of Fuckery Can Now Add Songwriter To My CV. ( a blog thanks to Truly)

Hello My lovelies.  Your Dean of Fuckery, Law Professor, Doctor of Doctoring,  Animal lactation consultant, Certified Rabies Free RBMD, Resident sarcasm expert, Pretend Judge, owner of one in house Psychic, Queen of all I survey and now Song Writer extraordinaire has come up with a new song thanks to Truly.

I realize it is not a real blog post, but it is better than nothing (at least sort of).

Without further carryings on, I give you  “The Shelter Got High” Original lyrics by RBMD.

Thanks Truly for the idea.  Totally needed to get out of the political mind space I’ve been in.
I was thinking bout politics until I got high, I decided that they are all dicks because I got high, can’t think what I should write about and I know why, ya ha because I got high, because I got high, because I got high
I was gonna find us a trial but then I got high.  It was gonna beat stabs by a mile until I got high, Now I don’t have a blog and I know why ya man, because I got high, because I got high, Because I got high la-da-da-da-da-de-da,
The in-house Psychic spoke up because she was high, no more posts about Trump she said cuz she’s sly.  She threw in the Clintons too and I know why yeah haaa because she was high, because she was high, because she was high.
 The no kill shelter joined in, Because you were high, Lots of good thoughts were coined because you were high, Truly had an idea and I know why, do so, because she was high, because she was high, because she was high, la da da da da de da
I figured this would be hard before I got high,  there were thoughts I had to discard because I was high, Finally decided to just write this, we all know why,  yahaaaa, Because I’m High, because I’m high, because I’m high.
I know that you’re all gonna like it because you’re all high,  or you might all think it’s just shit because you’re all high, I couldn’t give a fuck and you know why, yeah, because I’m still high, because I’m still high, because I’m still high.
For anybody that’s kind of thick I’m not really high, might as well cut this off quick because I’m not high, don’t bother to report this because it won’t fly yeah haaa, I’m not really high, I’m not really high, I’m not really high.
It’s just a fucking song because we were bored, turn it into what ever you want the Big Dog roared.  We don’t give a fuck and that’s for sure yeah man because we’re not high, because we’re not high, because we’re not high.
So there we have it kids.  One non-political, somewhat amusing, song writing effort by your Dean of Fuckery.  Hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Really Big Mean Dog Peacing the fuck out.



22 Responses to Your Dean Of Fuckery Can Now Add Songwriter To My CV. ( a blog thanks to Truly)

  1. renaes24 says:

    That will not get you the cover of Rolling Stone.

  2. bazzethound says:

    Loved it! There’s just something about that song – just thinking about it leaves it in your head all day. I’m also trying not to watch as much political news and opinion. My ever-so-helpful-and totally-Republican husband thinks it wasn’t helping with my anxiety and depression. He’s probably right.

    Here’s a coincidence: Yesterday, Concussion-Boy and I were headed to his physical therapy appointment when I started singing

    “I Think I Farted,”

    to the tune of “I Think I Love You” from David Cassidy from my toddler days of the early 1970s. Concussion-Boy was slightly amused, but I cracked myself up for several miles.

    I was gonna write more, but you know…I got high.


  3. twister says:

    Kids in Syria are dying, my heart is crying, missiles are flying. I’m getting high, ye-ha I’m getting high.

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      While all very true my twister, this is one of those laugh or cry things and I ran out of tears a long time ago, so I will just try and keep us all amused.

  4. bazzethound says:

    I HAVE AN IDEA!!!!

    Could we all watch the three night docu-series about Casey Anthony that’s on this Sunday, April 11 @ 10 pm on Investigation Discovery (ID)?

    I’d love to hear what our RBMD and the pound sisters have to say about it.

  5. TrulyUSA says:

    Hahaha! I was sitting there last night on my couch in my pink satin kimono wearing my favorite bell bottom pjs with the big flowers all over them, looking on-line to find a VW bus (damn those things are expensive now) so I could renew the gypsy lifestyle I once enjoyed (since the world is going to end I might as well be in Yellowstone or Key West or the Oregon coast). That’s when it hit me — my problem is I’m not high! That’s why everything went to shit! I need flowers in my hair! I need a teepee! I need an outdoor sauna! Where’s the nearest festival? Do they still have dead heads or are all the heads dead? **sigh** all my rowdy friends have settled down. Speaking of the Cover of the Rolling Stones — that was my first album I think — Dr. Hook –Sloppy Seconds. I remember it well. Favorite song was Freakers Ball – you absolutely must YouTube it for a good laugh. So, rub my body up with butter and take me to the Freakers Ball! Y’all! I’m going to the Freakers Ball! So – if you see a 60 year old Freak flying her Freak Flag – please stop and roll one!

  6. Mama Via says:

    I WISH I were getting high…but my pain management says all I can do are the legal drugs he gives me…and…right now…I’m trying to have fun with the codine cough syrup that they gave me for the bronchial pneumonia I got now…the good news/bad news is…that against everyone’s advice, I was hooked on cigarettes for too long…and I’ve fucked up my lungs…and now I’m paying the price…

    I’m gonna go back to my coughing fits..and mix codine and pain pills…

    • reallybigmeandog says:

      My dearest mama. I know I speak for us all when I say we are all thinking good thoughts for you and hoping that your agony eases soon. I love you to the moon and back. Please get well soon.

      • TrulyUSA says:

        Mama I’m praying for you – I quit those cigarettes about 12 years ago and I think I just made it in time to avoid problems. I’m so sorry you are going through this – we love you please take care of yourself!

      • Mama Via says:

        I gave a doc appointment tomorrow…I’ll let you know how it goes….

        I’m sooooo happy that I quit smoking 6 years ago–1/11/11–an auspicious day, obviously…and haven’t touched anything since…so, maybe I’ll be better again in the next week…take a pneumonia shot, the flu shot and stay healthy for another year…I hope all of us stay healthy!

        GB–I’ve got AB in my prayers…he will be fine, I’m sure…I had ”scrambled brains” once…and look at me…I’m kinda norma….wait, that’s probably not a good example to give you…I’ll try to think up a better example than THAT!!!

        My PROBLEM, ladies, was…..that back when my bio-mother was “expecting” me…not ONLY did the doctor tell her that “no, abortions are ILLEGAL”….(as she seems to enjoy reminding me as she plays the game “Martyr”…followed be the game “Pack Your Bags, You’re Going on a Guilt Trip”!); doctors didn’t inform their new mothers-to-be that they shouldn’t be smoking 4 packs of LSMFT (Lucky Strike/Unfiltered) and/or spending every damned night parked on the corner stool at The Surly Wench Bar…in fact, according to the tribute to motherhood that I was blessed with, she was permitted to actually leave the hospital without the SLIGHTEST knowledge of WHY babies wear diapers; she adds that she finds it hilarious that my “first spanking” came when we got home from the hospital, and she was sure I had peed on my dress “on purpose”.

        I suspect that she is not TRULY my biological egg donor…I’m POSITIVE that some other family in Seattle has been questioning themselves for DECADES about exactly HOW two intelligent people who actually planned and wanted a child could end up with such a DUMB KID! How could non-drinking/non-smoking parents end up with a baby who was born on a barstool, with a drink in one hand and a Lucky Strike in the other?

        I had two parents who bought CASES of Lucky Strike at the commissary, they didn’t buy “cartons”…they BOTH chain smoked; lighting the new cigarette off the one they’d just finished. We didn’t have ash TRAYS, we had ash BOWLS, and most of the time, there were multiple fires going in the ashtray in the car…the nasty butts that were there catching fire from the one they’d just “put out”…often the small “wing” window in the front doors was cracked open so they could flip ashes and butts out the windows, to avoid the fire going in the ash tray…Then, twice or more each year, we would pile into the station wagon, get on Route 66 and drive from San Diego to Iowa. In winter, all the windows rolled up tight to keep the heat in; in summer, rolled up tight to keep the air conditioned air in…and both of them chain smoking…my sister and I suffocating in the back. My folks rarely stopped at motels; so it was usually me selected to be “navigator” as one of the adults retreated to the back for “40 winks”…the navigators job was to light cigarettes, so that the driver wouldn’t have to “take his eyes from the road” at night, in the rain-storm, snow-storm, what have you…so…1800 miles…36 hours…stopping only for gas (and cigarettes)…breathing only “bar air”….smokey, vodka drenched air….it’s a wonder I didn’t have emphysema when I was 16!

        I begged my son when he went into the navy…”PLEASE, don’t learn to smoke!” He said he wouldn’t…but his first visit home…he was smoking… he said he was “Defensive Smoking”, and I understood that! He was the only non smoker on a SUBMARINE! Talk about not having fresh air! When you are the only non smoker in a small enclosed area, the smoke kills you…but, if you are smoking WITH them, the smoke isn’t as bad…the same thing had happened to me…I began smoking as a “defense” …and then…couldn’t quit. Wish I had never started that nasty habit! (Not to mention how much money I spent on the habit! That my clothing, car, home…everything stink, stank, stunk! Oh well…that was then, this is now…and, to be honest, I’m frightened…I’m going to have to “pay” for all those years, all those choices…maybe the doctor will ease those fears a little tomorrow…

        But…there is good news…I’ve never been a drinker…sure, occasionally, I’ll have a drink…but it’s VERY rare. One glass of wine makes me tipsy…so, at least I don’t have any problems stemming from abusing alcohol. I’m thankful for that!

        Keep your toes crossed for me tomorrow…

  7. Mama Via says:

    Here is the update…I am still all “croupy”…so another round of antibiotics (moxifloxacin) (I think I spelled it right) and 6 days of prednisone, and codine cough syrup…good Lordy, I hate this! I think maybe this is just god’s way of keeping me humble…I may live in a nice house…but, if I’m not a good girl…he’s telling me that He could order a “Dirt Nap” for me….which would knock ME down a peg or two, huh?

    I find it very interesting that 12 years ago, I was so damned miserable…back then…I was READY for a Dirt Nap…it seemed that “my life was over”…and I had nothing to look forward to…now, sharing my life with my DH…(yes, even on days when he is a BIG FAT PITA!!!) I feel that not even 20-35 years in the future will be enough.

    I’m kinda depressed…my Doc, “Buster” Brown is about 8-10 years older than me…and I just LOVE HIM…he truly UNDERSTANDS when I say “You gotta help me Doc Brown! My Mental-pause is fooling with my marriage! If I can’t get these moods and the hot flashes under control, the man is going to put me out to pasture!” He nodded his head, and said “oh, yes…I know how bad it can be…Mrs Doctor Brown is experiencing the same thing, so I know what your husband and YOU are going thru…I’m sure I can help you! Mrs Doctor Brown takes this medicine, but it helps her a LOT!!” And by golly, he knew how to cure what ailed me!

    But…he has cut down his hours…and you have to wait a month to see him…and the only doc available is one who just graduated Med School 6 years ago…all he KNOWS is what he has read…he is just lacking experience. I sure miss Doc Brown…HE KNEW what me and my desiccated hoo-hoo are going thru….he KNOWS what my poor DH endures…that his high blood pressure pills and a half of a martini can kill a Viagra…I support his retirement…but, gee whiz…at least he could find me another doc with grey hair, at LEAST!!

    The thing about “no being able to breathe”….it makes you view your own mortality in greater depth…it’s like being bi-polar…everything’s good when you can breathe…but your brains stop working when the oxygen goes below 75%! There IS some consolation in knowing what the path will be….

    I have an uncle in his 80s…for the past 5 years, he has had no idea WHO he is, or why he is there. He does some really silly stuff…like hop out of bed at 3 a.m., swearing that he HAS to get ready for work RIGHT NOW!! Another time, he told his wife (they’ve been married 68 years) that she “sure is pretty” and asked if she had a boyfriend…later that night, he begged her to let him “spend the night” with her…and promised to “act like a gentleman”….

    I’ve got one cousin, David, who was just a few months younger than me…last year, he was diagnosed with ALS-Lou Gehrig Disease…he passed on just after Christmas…his dad, born just a few years earlier than my dad…has been having “issues”. His wife passed a few years ago, so he is pretty lonely…last week, he called one of his younger sisters, asked her to “watch his house” for a few days, because he had decided to “go visit David”…my Auntie had a difficult time talking him out of packing the car & not taking the “road trip”…she didn’t know how to tell my uncle that David had passed several months ago.

    I guess the “good” thing with both of my uncles…is that they are totally clueless about “reality”…and maybe that’s a gift, isn’t it?

    Well…those are the thoughts for the day…I’ll keep you posted…

    • TrulyUSA says:

      Do everything your doctor says! Take that moxinfloxin or whatever it is religiously and rest. My “mental pause” is pretty much over, I started at age 45 due to an overabundance of stress, or so the doctor said. “Oh, is that why patches of my hair are falling out too?” I asked? He advised me to get a different job, but I needed the pay so I stuck it out. “Be kind to yourself” my new lady doctor says, “take liquid calcium and extra Vitamin D and B 12 complex and eat fresh foods”. Where’s that damned fountain of youth? Isn’t it somewhere in your area Mama? We need to find that sucker!

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