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A Bushy Haired Stranger Just Shot My Kids…Sorry that’s Dianne Downs. The Hippies Did It Part 8

January 13, 2018

 

 

Hello my lovelies.  Your Dean of fuckery, doctor of doctoring, horse whisperer, honorary DVM, pretend judge, writer of enviable amicus briefs, dog lactation consultant, purveyor of written motions that should be allowed in court because mine are way more fun, author of the big book of words and Queen of all I survey is not amused.  I had this post more than three quarters of the way written.   I saved it, left to go check a couple of facts, came back and guess what?  I’ll wait…THE ENTIRE FUCKING BLOG WAS GONE.  Seriously, this is like the third time this has happened to different posts.  Remember back to the stabby one I lost four times?  Word Press seriously needs to deal with some shit because I discovered something else about WordPress the other day which I will talk about later.  It takes me a lot of hours to write these blogs and when I know I saved it and then it is just gone really pisses me off.

Anyway, enough bitching about that for now, on with the show.

When we last left the shit show  Brian Murtagh had been accidentally stabbed during a courtroom display in which he and Jim Blackburn were trying to show that the perfectly cylindrical holes in the pyjama top would not have been possible if the top had been wrapped around MacFuckhead’s hands and being used as a shield as he had sworn too since the beginning of the most unbelievable story ever told took shape.  Not only did the pyjama end up with ragged tears, Brian ended up stabbed, another thing that had never happened to Jeffy.  Not one single defensive wound on his fingers, hands or forearms. Not so much as a scratch, while Brian had received a fairly significant wound during a relatively controlled experiment for the jury.  It spoke volumes and the jury did not miss it.

The people were winding up their case.  Paul Stombaugh was now up on the stand and he explained the blood evidence to the jury.  It was damning evidence.  And it came as close as anybody ever would to explaining the movements inside of castle drive that evening.  The Jury paid rapt attention.  With the conclusion of Stombaughs testimony the people rested and court was adjourned for the day.

Bernard had managed to locate a woman by the name of Helena Stokely, or what was left of her after one too many dances with the magic dragon.  She was a complete burnout, but she was a hippie, she had been known to wear a blonde wig on occasion and she was in the vicinity of castle drive the evening of the murders.  Hey, one hippie was better than no hippies and this one was possibly malleable enough to be convinced to testify that she had been inside the residence.   He brought her in for a deposition and she told him she was aware of the murders (as was everyone else on the planet pretty much) and that she knew where the Macfuckoffanddie residence was.  She said a friend of hers had showed it to her one day bitching that the doctor that lived there wouldn’t give him any methadone.  Macfamilyanihilator was kind of a you got yourself in you get yourself out kind of guy when it came to drugs apparently.  Pretty hypocritical for somebody that was taking enough amphetamines that he was worried about how fast it would clear his system.  Bernie hammered her saying she didn’t have to say she did anything but hold a candle but she needed to admit she was there.  Not only was she adamant that she was not present when Siegal threw the crime scene photos in front of her face she told him there was no way somebody on acid did that.  Her next sentence as recorded by Joe McGinnis well before he ever found the notes on the speed were, “maybe somebody on speed, did they check him for drugs.”  Now she could have probably been sworn as an expert witness on drugs so that was a pretty telling thing to say.  Bernie wisely decided not to call her as a witness.

Bernie decided it was time to start prepping Jeffy for his testimony.  Jeffy was slightly agitated.  He had not been thrilled with the jury he had paid an expert to help seat, and he felt he was being challenged when Bernie told him he planned on showing the jury a family, not just a bunch of crime scene photos but he wanted them to feel a living breathing  family.  Jeffy asked Bernie if he was saying he had to convince the jury he was innocent.  Bernie tried to stem the volcano that was about to erupt by telling Jeffy that he thought they could rest now and win, but he didn’t want to take the chance of one hold-out juror making them do it all again.  At this point Jeffy amped up a little and began spiking questions about which juror Bernie thought it would be, the beady eyed one, the one that keeps looking at him like the juror is the grand dragon of the KKK and Jeff was a black guy dating his daughter.  Bernie tried another tack, telling him he understood he was angry but to take it easy on attacking the army and probably muttering under his breath that his big mouth is what had got him into this in the first place.  Jeff became sarcastic.  Bernie got made and made the error of reminding Jeffy that this is exactly how Woerheide had gotten under his skin at the grand jury.  Jeffy flipped his shit and in front of his entire legal team he started screaming at Bernie to never mention Victor Woerheide.  He’s a Nazi, He’s a goddamn Nazi he screamed at everybody before he realized this probably didn’t look good.  He got himself under control and took a deep breath before turning to face Bernie.  Okay he said calmly I will take everything you have said under advisement. (read: I’m totally gonna ignore you and do whatever I want anyway because I’m smarter than they are).    I have some advice for you.  That pony I bought the girls that one Christmas that every single person who has testified has talked about? ” Take it easy on the pony Bernie, after all the character witnesses, if the jury hears about that pony one more time they are gonna puke.”  Spoiler alert, they didn’t puke.

Jeffy showed nothing but contempt when he was crossed by Jim Blackburn and his contempt was very noticeable to everyone, especially the jury.  His pure, unadulterated hatred of Brian Murtagh was also pretty clear.

Fun fact, Jeff MacDonald could not work up a tear during the entire trial even while looking at the beat and stabbed to death pictures of his children.

It took the jurors only a little over 7 hours to come back with a verdict.  Guilty of second degree murder for Colette and Kimmie, and first degree for Kristen because the theory put forth by the prosecution that it was possible Colette had been an accident and Kimmie had been collateral damage, but Kristen had been killed on purpose to support his alibi was believed by the jury.

Here is what I believe.  Colette and he got into an argument about something, likely the parade of women that Colette was aware of and not being stupid she probably put it together  that there was no boxing trip to Russia.  At some point I believe she whacked him one with the hairbrush.  Overtired from the speed, being on speed, being sick of the wife and kids and fury that she would deign to actually hit him, Jeffy lost his shit and likely punched her square in the face.  Her nose and mouth were busted opened and while that could have come from the club later, I think he punched her.  The bent Geneva forge knife was in the bedroom being used as a paint scraper and I think Colette probably grabbed it to try and protect herself and that is when things went sideways.  He grabbed the piece of timber, hit her with it and that is when kimmie came in to see what al the screaming was from.  I think he caught her with a backswing because he didn’t know she was standing there and he killed her.  And that is when he knew he was either going to jail forever and ever or he was going to have to make up a story and hope that the army bought it.  Unfortunately for those that may have still been saved, he went with option two.  He put Kimmie back where she was supposed to be, he went and killed Kristen, he made sure Colette was good and dead and then he stabbed himself and called for help. Had he not felt the need to start a media tour on how stupid the army was he probably would have gotten away with it.  It was his own hubris that got the case reopened.  Freddy was the one who sealed the deal, but it was his own statements that started the ball rolling.

So that’s it, other than the leftovers.  He has appealed a staggering number of times.  They are all available to view online.  He has married a bridge troll named Kathryn.  They managed to steal most of the money Perry left to Jay “because Jay couldn’t handle money.”  He sued Joe McGinnis and they settled.  He ended up making way less money than he would have if he had let McGinnis alone.  I find that tidbit absolutely delicious.

That’s it kids.  The horrible tale of a green beret who should have never ever been married.  God help his wife if he ever gets out of prison.

Next up, until I find  something current to amuse us all with is going to be Robert Oakley Marshall, who had his wife killed.

RBMD peacing the fuck out.

 

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None Of It Was Real, We Were Trying To Get A Reality Show…er Jeffrey MacDonald Killed His Whole Entire Family Part 7

January 10, 2018

 

Hello my lovelies.  Your Dean of Fuckery, Doctor of Doctoring, Writer of enviable amicus briefs, Horse whisperer, dog lactation consultant, Honorary DVM, Resident sarcasm expert, author of the big book of words, And Queen of all I survey am back with whatever part this is of the Jeffrey MacFuckface Trial.

This is going to be another hoppy, skippy, jumpy one because I can’t help but jump back and forth to give you the entire picture of what went down during this whole shit show of a grand jury hearing and almost not a trial and then a trial.

Victor Woerheide was the one who had been ultimately charged with seeing that Macwhythefuckareyoustillusingourair was indicted and he took that job very seriously.  I actually saw somewhere yesterday erroneously stated in a book no less that Colette was 8 months pregnant.  Colette was five months pregnant with a male fetus when she was bludgeoned and stabbed and ice picked to death.  You know, it just struck me, if you substituted that piece of timber for a .25 calibre handgun we’d have a male stabby.  Hippies, ninjas, tomato, tomahto.

Anyway, Woerheide had some innate talent for getting under MacStabby’s skin.  He had Jeffy bellowing at him during certain parts of his questioning at the grand jury inquiry.  He was very quick to anger and the grand jury saw it.  He flat out refused (on advice of council) to take either a lie detector or sodium amytal interview.  YAY, we are now at the science part of the program.  Okay, so in the late 70’s after having gathered data that was available about lie detectors at that time, I wouldn’t have taken a lie detector test either, they were too new and actually rather unreliable.  Sodium amytal on the other hand was simply a barbiturate which is a drug that acts on the central nervous system to calm anxiety and induce drowsiness and lowers ones ability to lie.  If someone is looking for a simple answer as to whether someone did or did not do something this was the drug to use.  As in did you murder your entire family because you are a complete dick and you were just tired of them?  Or Were there hippies in the house the night your family was murdered?  Jeffy Weffy had to go out and confer with his Lawyer Bernie Segal which took a long time because Bernie had to write something for Jeffy to read to the grand jury, then he had to get copies for Woerheide and the grand jurists and it took a lot of time.  Basically all it said was a sodium amytal interview would make the person taking the amytal relive the event which would be too traumatic for him.  Seriously, you can take a drug and they say, he Jeff did you kill your family and you say nope and the Grand Jury would have come back probably immediately with a no bill but you say you don’t want it because it would be to traumatic.  Oh fuck puhlease.  If there is a drug that they could give you and it would basically clear you if you were telling the truth who in the fuck would not take it?   Oh a guilty one, that’s who.

So okay Woerheide got tired of playing with the long eviscerated carcass of Macdouchbag and they voted and he was indicted on three counts of murder.  YAY.

Bernie Segal immediately peed on the parade and filed a motion that he had not been afforded a speedy trial and therefor this should be thrown out.  While the fourth circuit court decided on this issue  MacHolyfuckIcan’tbelievethishappened got let out on bail  They ultimately decided that MacDieofahorribledisease  only had an article 32 which is basically the army equivalent of a  grand jury inquiry and because the military and civilian court were two totally different things,  jeopardy was NOT attached.  The FBI skipped on down to California to bring him back to Raleigh to face trial for the murder of his wife and two and a half children.  Jeffrey was shocked that he being mister perfect and all was not being believed by any of these people.  It was starting to piss him off a little.

In the interim between bail and the courts decision Victor Woerheide dropped dead of a heart attack on his front lawn.  Freddy was beside himself.  Woerheide was his bulldog, Woerheide would make sure Jeffy paid.  Brian Murtagh assured him that a very excellent lawyer would be taking Woerheide’s place.  Enter James Blackburn.  James Blackburn had never tried a murder case his entire career and was the complete antithesis of everything Woerheide had been.  It was now Mildred who did her best to shore up Freddy after  so many years of it being the other way around.  Mildred calmed Freddy down and said she had faith that while Mr. Blackburn may have a different way about him, he would not have been assigned this case if he did not have the necessary tools to get the job done.  Freddy would turn out to be greatly surprised by the tenacity of Mr. Blackburn. He wasn’t a bulldog, he was a bull terrier.

Jeffy and company set up camp at a frat house and proceeded to prep for trial.  He was still out on bond and one day he decided to give an  interview to a rookie reporter.  when asked about the trial he became indignant.  This is what he said. “There is no case,” MacDonald said. “They know there is no case. What they are trying to do is, they are trying to mound up a pile of stuff and make it look like a good investigation was done, and then in a closing argument, unbuttressed with any facts at all, they’re going to misinterpret the witnesses’ words. You watch.”

He heaped special scorn on two people he held principally responsible: His stepfather-in-law, Alfred Kassab, whose complaint with the Justice Department was the basis for re-opening the case; and Assistant U.S. Attorney Brian Murtagh, who helped prepare the case for trial.

And then he brought it up. The blue pajama top.

MacDonald had worn it the night of the murders. He said a government expert had come up with a model of that shirt, which would be shown during the trial.
“(It’s) something he devised in 1974 that he felt added to the case,” MacDonald said
He didn’t seem particularly worked up about this model. And showing my inexperience, I didn’t ask him to explain further.

But a few weeks later, its significance showed when the former FBI expert, Paul Stombaugh, took the stand.
Stombaugh said the shirt had 48 ice pick holes in it, more than four times the number of wounds found on MacDonald. None of the holes matched his wounds. But it was possible to fold the shirt in such a way that the holes equaled the 21 ice pick thrusts into the chest of MacDonald’s wife, Colette.
The shirt was found on her chest. MacDonald said he only put it there after regaining consciousness and finding her severely wounded.
But prosecutors asserted that he stabbed his wife with the ice pick through the pajama top to simulate an attack on him. { *Rick Thames*}

In one of the most brilliant maneuvers in courtroom history, Brian Murtagh had Jim Blackburn flail away at him as he held a pyjama top of the same type wrapped around his hands as MacFuckingdiealready had said his hands had been trapped in the top.  Even in the controlled setting of the courtroom, Brian Murtagh received a significant icepick wound on his hand.  Jeffy had received not a single wound of any kind other than those already spoken of.  He had never had any wounds on his hands, fingers or forearms.  It was a shocking display, especially when the unravelled the top and saw all the ragged torn holes, not nice little cylindrical punctures like the holes in the actual pyjama top.

Bernie Segal, who had his head so far up his own ass that he actually thought they were winning the thing asked if Mr. Murtagh required a doctor to some tittering from the gallery.

That’s it for tonight kids.  Tomorrow, what a bloody mess, trying to suborn perjury and if they hear about  that pony one more time they are gonna puke.

 

 


I Am On Day Three Of My Never Sleep Again Tour So You Will Have Part…What Fucking Part Are We On Of The Macfuckhead Trial Later Tonight Or Tomorrow.

January 10, 2018

 

My loyal subjects.  Your queen is very tired, and is unable to sleep.  I am being harangued by ghosts of days gone by and they won’t let me alone.  I’m working on the Macasshole thing still don’t worry I won’t leave you hanging, I am just trying to clarify something I just thought of 44 years later and if I thought of it, I bet MacDouchebag did too and I am trying to get an answer.  Won’t say till I find out because I do have confirmation that annihilator wife is reading the blog and it is making her very unhappy which is making me really happy.  So, from Colette, Kimmie, Kristen, Freddy,  me, Victor Worheide, everyone at the no kill shelter and Mildred, eat a dick you fucking embezzling your mentally ill brother in laws money crazy fuckwit cunt.  It’s the only one you’ll be seeing in this lifetime anyway, unless you have some sort of arrangement.

Anyway, I have something for show and tell.  Remember when my invisible dog warf died?  Well I got me a new invisible one named Ted. E. Bear. Esq.

ted e bear

He was born at the beginning of November and as of his vet check  he weighs 37lbs.  Ain’t he a cutie pie?  I know you can’t see him because he doesn’t exist, but there he is.

Please ignore the castle flooring.  It is being re-done if the guy I want to do it still wants to trade for a truck which is the plan.  The floors are 31yrs old so yeah they need to be done.  I know.

Also in my I’m so tired I want to fall down state I re-attached the door to the pantry, fixed a couple of lights, did laundry I think.  I have to check that because I may have hallucinated that.  Who knew 17 year old boys were prone to rages.  He is getting a crash plastering course tonight because he has a lot of holes to fix.  Dumbass broke his hand punching the wall and then picked the cast off so he could take his driving test.  So now he needs a new cast, but he did pass his driving test.  I even let him take the car to school today.  He is getting tired of driving already because now my invisible agoraphobia doesn’t have to make itself go outside.

Anyway, don’t worry, there is plenty more of Jeffrey Macfuckmeintheass to come.  Likely tonight so watch for it.

RBMD peacing the fuck out.


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Varmt News Network

It's the Internet.

peskyvarmt

Just another WordPress.com site

Asleep in Left Field-My Life

4 out of 5 Friends recommend this WordPress.com site

Out in left field

(Totally fictional) Drama Queen Stories

CALLS FOR JUSTICE

sometimes, there are monsters walking amongst us