Welp,Since I have nothing courtworthy to report I’m just gonna talk about life

October 16, 2019

Hello my lovelies.  Your Queen of all I survey, pretend judge, animal lactation consultant, horse whisperer, pig murderer has had a lot on her mind.  The problem is it is swirling around like the beginnings of a tornado and it is starting to scare me a little.

I’ll start with the pig farm.  I got hired as the manager which I assumed meant I had people working for me.  Nope.  Now pigs die.  big pigs like 400lb pigs die.  I am 4’11” and weigh right around a hundred and four lbs.  So every time a big pig died I had to call someone to get it out of the barn.  The closest feeder barn (where I got the piglets) was 45 minutes away and they did not appreciate having to come move a dead rotting pig.  There was supposed to be an auto mover but it didn’t work.  Next, pigs bite and big pigs mean big bites and something in the feed they finally figured out was making them violent.  I got bit so bad I needed stitches that they couldn’t give me because I worked in shit all day.  Then a pig tried to eat my phone and smashed it.  Next was the ripping of all the waterpipes off of the walls.  I did learn to plumb so there was that.  Now please bear in mind I had to do this stuff all on my own.  I got shipments of 500 piglets per shipment.  Got them in on Tuesdays and Thursdays and had to have them all needled by Wednesday and Friday.  And then I had to cull the ones that were just to far behind to be profitable.  I love animals and I value life even if it is going to end up on a cutting room floor.  I did my best to keep them happy and healthy.  The government vet came through and told me I had to start culling more piglets.  you cull a piglet by bashing it over the head with a hammer.  And I did it and I still have nightmares about it.  You see each and everyone I thought I could save.  I don’t eat pork anymore, I won’t allow it in the house.  So I resigned my position since they refused to let me hire part time help to help me with the big hogs and more importantly what if something happened and I was the only one there.  Pigs eat meat.  I’m meat.  If they ever managed to get me off of my feet I would have been done.

So I came home.  I’d been letting my son stay here for free in exchange for fixing up the house.  My son has rages and he ended up kicking doors off the kitchen cupboards, he let his friends draw penises on my walls, he kicked holes in the drywall and then he got mad because I could not do the job that was killing me.

Then the water tank blew in the basement  and left me with 2 feet of water and a bunch of ruined stuff.

I have been working hard to try and get the house back in order.  After a two year hiatus I finally have a working oven again.  I got it off of the buy and sell for 75 dollars.  Then I had to go get a sawsall because of course it was too big.  I made it fit with some creative cutting.

My kitchen sink lines rotted out, but like I said I learned to plumb at the barn and after only two weeks of dicking around I actually fixed it.

I am not in a good headspace which is why I need to write.  Find me something.  Election if you want, crime preferably.  Maybe we could do another old one if there is nothing exciting.  Once stabby comes up we will have something but until then, throw me something.  My brain is going to hurt me soon.  I don’t sleep, I barely eat, I need something to center me.

I love you guys

RBMD peacing the fuck out

So, to the point of blind faithfulness.

July 22, 2019

To be blindly faithful is to believe something that every other thing you see before you refutes.  It takes a certain mindset to be blindly faithful and not being of the blindly faithful kind myself I thank the human brain that it works the way it does.

So we were at the point of warrants and phone calls and a hardware store owner and Ferlin and Ricky and Poor misunderstood ROB.  Welp those Louisiana police do not play and they done arrested everybody just to be on the safe side.  Felize got herself a lawyer cuz that woman had a tale to tell.  Ricky got bail and the guy that the police think shot the woman moved into her home for the trial.  Rob couldn’t make bale being as he was broke as a joke and bondsman don’t take kindly to dead mothers of young children apparently.  Tessie MacBride also moved in to keep an eye on the youngest boy and no I am not going looking for his name again we will just dispense with it right now and say to this very day he believes his daddy didn’t do nuthin.

Well Felize story was one of money problems and Rob O asking her if she knew someone who could take care of Maria.  Maria by all accounts an earth bound angel. Of course Rob O denied all this, ricky dunlap denied knowing anything about it, Ferlin admitted to taking money but insisted he was never going to shoot a woman just looking after her babies and then Rob O got on the stand.  He proceeded to pronounce his undying love of his wife and how very much he missed her and someone very much like juan Martinez went after him like a rabid dog.  You loved her so much he asked incredulously?  Rob cried and confirmed he did.  He then asked if he loved her so much why were her ashes still sitting in a drawer at the funeral home?  Where was his wedding ring? Rob O got a standing 8 count that day and he knew he was in serious trouble.  But he had an ace.  Surely his boy would tell a little white lie for him.  He called Robbie and asked if he’d say he was in the house the day one of the phone calls was made because if he did the case would fall apart.  Robbie was slightly taken aback by this request seeing as how his daddy was innocent and all.  He finally got mad and said no way and he kept his word.  he took the stand, held his head high and told the truth.  And that was the last nail in the coffin or Robert O Marshall.  He got the death penalty but it was converted to life.  Ferlin got a slap on the wrist and the shooter walked away scot free.

Thus endeth the Tale of Robert O Marshall piece of shit wife murdering bastard.  Hope he rots in hell.


That’s it my lovelies

RBMD peacing the fuck out

Robert Oakly Marshall…fuck I just can’t with that name thinks he is more intelligent than the Louisiana police.

July 20, 2019

So everybody figured out right quick that the driver doesn’t get smacked with a tire iron and the wife gets shot. Twice.  Unless of course it was on purpose.  So the police started doing what police do and sooner rather than later they discovered about a hundred billion phone calls to a hardware store in Louisiana.  Maybe he was going fishing lets give him the benefit of the doubt for now.  Oddly enough that just happens to be where good ole Ferlin spent an awful lot of time.  There were another hundred million phone calls to felize of slut fame.  He wuved her.  He couldn’t live without her.  Even Ferlin who had absolutely decided he could milk this cow for a long time but he wasn’t killing that angelic woman.  Why not divorce her asked Ferlin.  Robert explained his dire financial problems and told him about the millions in insurance money he carried on his wife.  Selling tool he said.  Well Ferlin continued to milk the cow but word got back to someone that took umbrage with the fact that hitmen of Louisiana local 197 was not being represented so he told Ferlin he was taking over.  Ferlin was in a pickle.  He absolutely did not want Maria to die, he said even just from a picture he could tell she was a wonderful person, but money had been paid and the contract was due.  Enter ricky dunlap.  Ricky checked out the turnoff that Rob was supposed to take and approved the site and the plan was put into action. She got dead, Rob got Robbed of his 12000 which paid the contract in full Ferlin got PTSD.

Rob broke the news to his sons like he was ordering a burger with extra ketchup.  And of course his boys believed the story for a while.  Even after they found out about felize.  Hell they were to busy dealing with burying their mother and all the vultures that descend wanting clothes and knickknacks and whatever else they could escape with.  The second robbery.  Maria had nice things and the community wanted those things and Robby and Chris spent most of their time at the wake yelling at people to put stuff back.  Uncle Sal was there doing his best to help the boys.  Tessie MacBride had showed up and appeared to not be leaving.  She said she was staying to help with the boys, she was a family friend (and I use the term loosely).  She hated Sal and did everything in her considerable power to keep the boys away from him.

That is when the police started to show up pretty much everywhere.  Jobs, homes, stripmalls, you name it they showed up and they had warrants for everybody.


Tomorrow follow the lady there she is

RBMD peacing the fuck out


Hi, it’s Mama!!

September 27, 2016

Ok, for those that haven’t heard…we moved in…we are still “settling in”…slowly…

My studio….


The “Great Room”
The Formal Dining Room
The Entry
The pool area
I’ve also spent a very small amount of time in my studio…I’m very “rusty”…I really need to get some practice painting done…
Hope you enjoy the pictures!!

House Update-Final Chapter

July 31, 2016

Well, at least the “semi-final” chapter!  We close on Friday, just 5 days from now…and only a few “minor” items remain to be done: painting the garage doors, installing the freezer and the oven, the final paint touch ups throughout, etc…so, without further ado, I present: Casa Azul…

At the foyer; looking into the Family Room, immediate left is the Billiards Room, immediate right is the Formal Dining Room, ahead and to the left, the Master Suite, straight ahead, the patio & pool,  ahead and right, the Dining Nook, Kitchen, ahead, to the right and down the hall, Butlers pantry, Drop Zone and laundry and to the right and down the left hall, DH’s office, Guest Suite and my Studio.
billiards Room
Formal Dining Room
Dining Nook
Gas Fireplace in Great Room
Master Suite
Master Suite Bath
Laundry Room & Mechanical
Drop Zone
Guest Suite
Guest Suite Bath
My Studio
Back yard–Left
Back Yard, Right

Boo “helping”

Well….that’s the end for now, ladies….I won’t make you suffer thru my interior design troubles….we are very happy with the final result…and I know we will have many happy years living in our beautiful home!  Thanks for your support and comments throughout the process!!

House Update #5

July 10, 2016

Hi, everyone!  Yes, I am feeling better…I’m not 100%…YET…but I WILL BE!

Here is the “Progress Report”….in MY (humble) opinion…the house is even more beautiful than it was at the last visit!  To get the entire hous into the viewfinder, it seems that I need to step across the street and back into lot 53…I will figure out how to do it on my next visit…maybe….m the pavers driveway looks really wonderful…that drive will last longer than the years that Papa and I have left!
For the most part, there was no activity INside the house…all the work this week took place in the yard.  This is the “California Room” just outside the Great Room sliding glass doors.  You can see they have the “Pavers on the concrete” installed…
The paver patio is close to complete…just need to “sand it”…which consists of sweeping sand into the spaces between the bricks, which acts as a “mortar”.  I think it looks wonderful…very happy with it.  You can just barely see the cobalt tiles set at what will be the “waterline”. Once the pool is filled with water…the blue water will really make it all “Pop”!!
Here we go…this is the “overall effect”….once the sod is put down, there will be some “contrast”….
It’s interesting, watching the patterns of the tree shadows changing throughout the day….if I remember correctly, this photo is taken looking almost “East”…the house is oriented North NorthEast….so, the majority of the afternoon sunshine tends to beat down on the front of the house; the garage and dining room and billiards room.  For FLORIDA, this is perfect…the trees act as a wind break for the North Wind in what little “winter” we have….and the trees and house give plenty of “shade” during the “Dog Days” of Summer!  Funny…how “short” my 6 foot plus son appears to be in this photo…those 10-11 foot ceilings tend to make everyone short!!
Well…that’s all of my “First World Problems” today, ladies….a few insignificant items were completed at the house….the cooktop, dishwasher and vent hood were all installed….oh, and the chandlier in the dining nook was installed….they also finished “sanding” the back patio and pool deck….it looks very nice.  We have the “punch list walk thru” scheduled for the 27th….and the final walk thru on August 5th at 1 o’clock, and closing at 2 o’clock.  (Pretty sure of themselves, huh?). I expect the next set of photos to have a fence and some sod….maybe a few trees….I’m starting to get excited…I can hardly wait to get over!
Love to all….Live Long and Live Well…

Hi, Everyone!!! A Note from MamaVia

July 5, 2016

Hi!!!  Mama here…more or less…on the 22nd, Papa kidnapped me from the sofa and forced me to get on a plane full of people with GERMS…and we flew into Billings, Montana….then drove to Sheridan, Wyoming.  Papa seems to think that although I was BORN in WASHINGTON STATE, grew up in SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA, and lived 12 years in SAN ANTONIO….(with 6 months of “hard time” at Lowry AFB, Colorado) that I hadn’t seen “the real west”…trust me…I saw what I wanted to see….Indians?  There’s Indians in Washington State….and California….mountains?  There’s mountains in both states…and some called “Hills” in Texas…so…..in MY CONSIDERED OPINION….I HAD MISSED NOTHING!!!  I once drove to Mount Rushmore….and the Crazy Horse Monument….it’s not like I am a sheltered traveler….but….to keep everything happy…I dragged my raggedy ass off the sofa, sent Boo to Brenda’s house, threw some of my skorts into a paper bag and off we went…SIGH……….

Thursday, the 23rd…I woke up with a sore throat…oh, lovely…so, went to the pharmacy, got some cold-ease and hoped I wouldn’t get sick…clambered into the rented Subaru Outback and my “chauffeur” drove me up the crookedest derned road I’ve ever been on…nothing but rock…oh, look at the rocks…oh, look at that rock!  Needless to say….I got car sick…grabbed my pillow, got in the backseat, and went to sleep…my head wedged against one door, my feet propped against the other…hoping that the Great Indian, “Falling Rocks” wasn’t going to attack the Outback…

Met my husband’s “friend”….a short ugly little man….a cross between a troll and a leprechaun…obviously a heavy drinker from the florid face, bulbous nose and BIG MOUTH.  A MYSOGYNIST….whose wife adores him…he is HUGE into guns, prepping, himself, drinking and generally being an asshole….I cannot stand him…he is an authentic “Florida Cracker” and proud of it.  How he found such a wonderful, caring, considerate wife, I’ll never know…..my husband drinks too much when he is around Cracker….and I don’t like that, either.

I’m not really sure when I got sick…but I can barely remember the 6 days we were gone.  All I wanted to do was to come home.  Somewhere about the 24th or 25th….I can actually FEEL the crap in my lungs “crackling”…I can BARELY breathe….my dearest insisted we go to “Buffalo”…where all he did was sit on a park bench under a tree on the street…(I called my doc at home & made an appointment on the 29th)..we didn’t shop, we didn’t walk (who could walk with all that crackling and out of breath stuff?). We went with Cracker & Wife for dinner…I don’t remember eating, or talking or even where we went.  I couldn’t breathe…at some point, we went shopping…my DH purchased a pair of cowboy boots for me (why?  I don’t know!) and a hat….the boots didn’t really look at that “hot” with my skorts!  I began thinking I needed to go to the emergency room…I couldn’t breathe…I wanted to go home….FINALLY….the 28th!!  Up at 2am for the two hour drive back to Billings…yes, I slept in the back…airport at 4 am, turn in the rental, go thru security….sit around to finally get on the plane…I still can’t breathe (do you see the theme, here?). FINALLY….home at 5:30 Eastern…go get the dog at 7…home by 8….(thank you, son, for driving me…). I fell asleep exhausted…

By the time I got to my doc on the 29th, I was barely alive….my fingertips were bluish, my ankles are so swollen that I feel the water “sloshing” with every step….I can’t “let water” at all…I’m struggling for every breath…the receptionist was so shocked at my presentation, she forget to collect her co-pay…I’m put into a room with no weigh in, no blood pressure check…and, suddenly, it’s like a scene from E.R….Dr. Browning is shouting for Epi-shots and steroids and giving instructions…several nurses are preparing shots and breathing machines and putting monitors in me…my oxygen concentration at 75% has everyone going nuts…

Finally…the Epi and steroids kick in…and my oxygen gets up to 82%…maybe I will live after all…finally, after another hour of breathing treatments…I’m up to almost 91%…and they send me for some prescriptions and “bed rest”…I was ordered to go get a lung X-Ray….diagnosis: Community Acquired Pnemonia and COPD….last X-ray, several years ago, showed a spot on my right lung…we will see if it has grown any larger…or if, as I suspect, it’s just some scar tissue from my many bouts of Pnemonia and chronic bronchitis…all is well….

House Update:

Nothing much “substantial” has happened this month…the paint is done….


And….the paver driveway, sidewalk and porch are done…


The “waterline tiles” are installed in the pool….


The chandeliers are installed….


The cabinets and cabinet lighting completed….


And…my soaker tub is close to complete….


I’m so sick of waiting for everyone to get off their thumbs and get this house done!!!  We’ve been dealing with this since mid November…and I’m pretty sick of those men not getting anything done!!!  What SHOULD take a day, takes a week…what SHOULD take a week, takes a month…several weeks ago, I would have given this builder 5 stars…please don’t ask for a reference until after they quit piddling around and get this house done!!!  Maybe it’s like being pregnant…the last month is the worst for waiting…

I’ll let y’all know about the X-Ray when I get the results…I hope everyone is well…

Love, mama

House Update #4

May 22, 2016

Hi, everyone!  Gee!  How time flies!  It seems that not much has happened in the past two weeks…I decided last week to give you a break from the boring “how my house is going”…did you enjoy the “Dog Houses”??  I bet the one that Paris Hilton’s dog lives in is more expensive than all of our houses together…..I had “high hopes” for a lot to be accomplished two weeks ago…but, I was busy watching my seedlings…here is my spaghetti sauce growing….basil and tomatoes….how are your gardens growing?

Actually, although it doesn’t LOOK like much has been accomplished, quite a bit of work has been accomplished!  I REALLY wanted to get photos taken of the pool as it was built…but….my son and I drove down to the house several days ago, he hadn’t seen progress since the trusses were set.  We were about a mile and a half from the house when I noticed my “tire” light came on.  Just as I mentioned it to my son, my rear passenger tire started making a HORRIBLE noise, so I pulled over….forty two years ago, I confess, I was a bit disappointed when the doctor said “It’s a BOY!”  BUT…when that tire went wonky, it was my SON who was the first one out of the car to see what the problem was…so, “It’s a BOY!” is often  the very best thing that ever happened in my life!  So, my dear son said “No, we aren’t waiting an hour for AAA, Mom…I will put the spare on!”  And, faster than you can say H.R.Puffinstuff, the tire was swapped out, and we were in our way…the first thing we noticed was that they have the stucco on the front about half done….
This week, I guess they’ve been waiting for it to cure…they’ve added the keystones…
In the Billiards room, they worked on the bathroom tile…
That looks nice…we selected the white subway tile and the blue glass accent tile as the “default” throughout the house.  Because of the “wet location” we used a very simple generic “grey tile for the flooring in all of the bathrooms–you will see that in the master bath photo.  Next, is the guest-room bath:  they’ve finished the bath tile surround and the floor done….
And, in the Master Bath…they did not get the shower done…but, the floors are installed:
Very nice!  I’m happy!!!  Here is the closeup of the glass tile:
The REALLY big change was in the back yard:


The pool still needs that special coating…and the cobalt blue tiles done along the inside edge…but, you get the picture of what it is supposed to look like!   We had rain several days this week…and although you probably cannot tell by looking at it…we don’t have “soil” per se…we have SAND!  It’s a wonder that anything other than kudzu grows in the sand/silt left by the Millenium as the water ebbed and flowed in and out of the swamp! In spite of the rain, they were able to start the retaining wall …(after all, if rain stopped construction, Seattle wouldn’t have the Space Needle!!  Here is the yard before the retaining wall was started:
Before adding the retaining wall, our “level” yard ended about 10 feet closer to the house.  You can see the stick marking the line in the second photo.

Below, you can see…that by installing the retaining wall, the useable area of our yard is increased….
The angle is a little different, but you can still see the stick marking the old line indicating “level to here”.   If you look along the block wall, you can see about half way down (by the green trees) the drainage pipe.  There is another drainage pipe just out of camera view.  This allows the yard to drain down into the creek without washing away my soil and blocks &  pavers.  After the blocks are completed, brick pavers will be installed to cover those ugly blocks!
Well, ladies, I haven’t heard from Kelly…but I will send her an email to find out what is happening…and I will let you know.  Thank you for letting me share the building process with you…I’m afraid that it consumes my life right now…if I ever up and find something else to do that is exciting…or at least doesn’t have anything to do with building my house….I’ll let you know….until then…love to you all!!

Here is something Truly Different…

May 20, 2016

Just in case you have an extra $10,000 to $200,000 available…I have found a great way to please the Fur-Baby in your life…

What a lucky puppy!!  Glamping anyone??
For the pooch who wants some luxury while living a “simple life”….
I think that my step-daughters Cavelier King Charles Spaniel would have liked this one….
This one is for the Jupiter Beach Puppy…a true beach cottage….


This is the home of Paris Hilton’s little baby….


Just like real life…where the old southern mansions are broken up into individual “apartments”….bring all your pals over to visit!
I want a house that looks just like Mom’s!!
Complete with “window” air conditioner unit!  
This one is cute, with window boxes giving the illusion of walls!
Which one is your favorite???
I think Kelly will need the “extra large”….with accommodations for puppies, kittens, hamsters and other assorted 4-legged people!
Have a good week!!

House Update #3

May 5, 2016

Hi, it’s me….MamaVia….

While we wait for Kelly to recover from her Cat Bites Hand That Feeds…I’ll update with a (VERY) few photos.  I’m guessing that last week not much happened at the house because they had ordered the appraisal…which came in at a little more that 20K over purchase price, which is GOOD!!  BUT, I think they had to do it BEFORE all of the “owner’s selections” were installed…we wouldn’t want “customer upgrades” to enter into the appraisal…that would throw off EVERYTHING!!  The next steps in construction are installation of cabinets (all upgraded), countertops (upgraded to granite) and all the tile (also all upgraded–Bathrooms, showers, floors, kitchen, backslashes) so, the construction was held while the appraisal was completed.  BUT…we did get a (VERY) little bit of work done!
The EAST side of the house.  You can see the extra concrete I had poured as an answer to “where do we want to put the garbage cans?  I DO NOT like them inside the garage…I do not like to see them at all!  This way, neither the neighbors nor the family must look at them!
The north east side of the house–(my studio, dining nook and Family room)
The north west side of the house (family room and master suite)
The WEST side of the house.  The fence on this side of the house will be built after the pool is built…no reason to rush THAT job!  After going over the list, they STILL have SO MUCH MORE to accomplish!!  From insignificant things like installing the screens on the windows to major issues like building the retaining wall..are left.  At this point, we are exactly HALF complete.  We have SIXTY line items that need to be checked off.  Hopefully, it will go quickly!     Who has started the When Is Moving Day Pool?  I’m betting it will be JULY 15th…they won’t tell us…until they are only 45 days out…the appraisal expires in 90 days…so, it’s gonna be sometime in that time frame.  45-90 days.
Also, a note to Kelly…thanks so much for letting me share the Chronicles of Casa Azul!!

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Varmt News Network

It's the Internet.


Just another WordPress.com site

Asleep in Left Field-My Life

4 out of 5 Friends recommend this WordPress.com site

Out in left field

(Totally fictional) Drama Queen Stories


sometimes, there are monsters walking amongst us