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The Stabby Penalty Phase Retrial-The Never Ending Side-Bar Edition.

October 28, 2014

Good thing I kept the Pretoria puke bucket-Arizona

Hai kids. Hope everyone is well.

In Ontario today we laid Cpl. Cirillo to rest. Christine Beswick covered the funeral and will have an article up tomorrow. She is linked in the Blogroll if you are interested in reading it.

The Goodman verdict came in today. He was the super rich dude that was convicted of vehicular homicide and DUI manslaughter and then was granted a new trial. He got reconvicted today for the same things. DUI manslaughter and Vehicular homicide. Hope he gets more than the 16 years he got the first time around.

Today is the day we have all been dreading. It is a good thing I kept the puke bucket because I thought we all might need it. Today is the day we are going to get to see naked Stabby and get to listen to the vomit inducing illegally recorded phone sex tape. You’re welcome.

Court opened with an immediate sidebar because why not. If Alfred E. Nurmi isn’t going to win the world record for the most motions ever, he is damn well going to win for the most side-bars in a criminal trial ever. He’s no quitter!!

Her royal Highness Stabbykins was dressed in royal blue I’m sure just to piss off the Alexander family. Her glasses are still present. Expect to see them on E-bay the day after the trial is over. Cha Cha showed up in hot salmon today because if you reek like a fish you might as well dress like one I guess.

Alfred E. Went back to the defense table and he and Stabby had a deep and meaningful discussion about how much he hates her right now. Jenny From the Cell Block acted as referee.

Sometimes Judge Stephens gave an admonition to the gallery not to react to the phone sex tape when it is played. Only Travis’ brother was in the courtroom at this time. Then his sisters came back in.

Alfred E. got up and began his cross examination of Detective Flores. He hammered and hammered and hammered about who’s theory it was that the gunshot came first. He asked Flores how old Stabby was when she committed the crime and if she had a prior criminal record. Flores asked if he wanted her age in human or dog years. Human I guess so he said 27 and no she did not have a criminal record. He asked if Flores about the shell casing that was found and then started with the shower photo’s.

He showed one of Travis with his back turned to the camera and decides to just make a supposition and says if she wanted to kill him she could have done it then. Juan immediately objects; speculation and is sustained. Alfred E. was not to be deterred today though. He was animated enough that he almost appeared to be awake at times. He asked why the two Ninja’s were not looked into and Flores answered because all roads led to the three holed wonder. Nurmi was VERY lively this time around.

Next we got Jumbotron meat flaps. Aren’t ya glad I brought the puke bucket. Because the Jurors have not yet been tortured enough, the next pic was Jumbotron Stabby wonder hole number 2. Nurmi asked if it looked like Travis didn’t want to be there. Flores said no. Point being made by Nurmi is that this is not a man afraid of a stalker. He was banging the bitch, taking pictures of her naked, and spending time with her.

There was a 10 minute recess and then the phone sex-tape was on. Travis’ sisters left once again. The bailiff was polite enough to pass out barf-bags just in case the Pretoria puke bucket was being used by the gallery.

To summarize the sex tape, close your eyes, picture Stabby and her overused floppy cooch, a boomerang dick and then step on a cats tail. That pretty much sums it up.

Some interesting things that I noticed though. He obviously did not know he was being recorded. Travis says on the tape that he doesn’t like Spiderman or superman when they begin talking about superheroes so it’s pretty obvious he didn’t send the underwear. Most importantly, he NEVER said he loved her, not in 40 some odd minutes. Actually as soon as he was done yanking it, he started yawning and it was like “OK hooker, I’m done, I’d like to peace the fuck out now.”

The Stabby FREAKS have been coming out of the woodwork trying to make their aging very badly queen look better, and doing a really bad job at it.
See!!! stabby photoshop stabby photoshop 2 Bwahahahahahaha.

After lunch Alfred E. began the slander portion of the program. He went after Flores with a renewed gusto. He wanted to know if Travis was using his own free will when he said he wanted to stick his dick in her ass. He then started to go after Travis’ faith at which point Juan got a little pissy. He objected, there was a sidebar and Nurmi came back and qualified Flores as an LDS expert. He has been a member of the faith for decades apparently. He wanted to know if people believed Travis was a virgin. Flores said they did. Next question was does the law of chastity allow Travis to shoot Jizz on Stabby’s face. Juan Objected. Nurmi is trying to get the point across that Travis was a hypocrite and unfortunately I think he succeeded.

Juan got up and sadly for the first time he had to do damage control. Juan asked if slitting someone’s throat is condoned by Mormon teachings. Did Travis ever say he loved her. Flores said not that he was aware of. He asked if sex was the same as love. Flores said no. Does not following the law of chastity mean he deserved to have his throat slit? Of course not. Juan asked if there was any indication she was forced to pose for photos? Flores said none. He asked if Flores ever uncovered anything that said she was a nut bag. Not in his opinion. Then it got a little weird. Juan asked Flores if he believed she had parents. Alfred E. Objected. He asked Flores if he ever had sex with Nurmi? WTF and EWWWWW. Objection. Did you have sex with Stabby Einstein. WTF and BARF aaand I fucking object. I don’t need that mental picture thank you. He then asked if Flores disbelieved everything she told him and he said no.

Nurmi was back up and he asked Flores if he was writing a book. A couple of times. Flores was offended. I wonder who could have put an idea like that into Nurmi’s head? *cough*PIGVOMIT*cough* He asked Flores if he had a mind reading certificate to which he answered no, but he heard about some blogger with an in house psychic. He said that he could not then know what she was thinking when she was in Selinas to which he answered no and Baby Jesus answered my prayer and ended re-cross.

The State rested underlying evidence and mitigation starts on Thursday.

All in all it was NOT a good day for the prosecution. I think that the DP may be off the table kids. Alfred E. did a good job today. I give credit where it is due and he did a good job of confusing the Jury and taking down the States case today.

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Pigs and Jurors and Bashara. Oh My!!!

October 23, 2014

I’m very nice.  Until I’m not. -Arizona

Hai kids.  It’s me, your intrepid reporter Kelly.  Tonight I am not only reporting on the Stabby shenanigans as well as Bob Bashara,  but also the shenanigans going on in twitter land because I have once again become the picture hanging on the dartboard in the PV clubhouse.

So, let’s start with my day.  I had to go back to the doctor today because my eye has become grossly infected.  Infected enough that my doctor did an actual double take when he saw it.  He poked, which hurt, he prodded, which hurt more, and he rolled up my extremely swollen eyelid which almost got him a kick in the nuts.  My entire eye socket is swimming in puss apparently and I am blind in the eye because of the pressure on my optic nerve.  He ordered me antibiotics, huge ones and then informed me that I also need antibiotic drops but of course disability doesn’t pay for those because who cares if I go blind, so he didn’t bother writing that script.  He looked to see if he had any samples but he didn’t.   So, here’s hoping that the antibiotics work.

A soldier in my country was shot and killed for no apparent reason.  He was the soldier entrusted with guarding the tomb of the unknown soldier.  His job was to explain about the monument and answer questions from tour groups.  He was killed for absolutely no reason.  I don’t care if that was what he chose to do.  He was on home soil where war has not been declared.   There is a theory that this is ISIS payback for us sending 6 bombers to join the attempt to eradicate this terrorist organization. Ottawa was pretty much on complete lockdown and our PM was moved to safety. So far a pretty shitty day, but not the worst day ever.

I came home and talked to my twitter peeps for a while and started researching for tonight’s blog and got a heads up that I should check out some dudes twitter because he was saying some pretty shitty things about me.  So I did, and I wish I didn’t.  Of course he is a PV lover and apparently a Stabby lover since PV is telling the truth about Stabby and she is a MUCH better writer than I am.  Then he started talking about how I needed to see a plastic surgeon because I look like I fell on a hand grenade and then enquired if Really Big Mean Dog was because I was a really fat miserable bitch.  I of course told my friends who summarily went insane, which was not my intent, I was just upset and wanted to tell someone.  I reported and blocked and hopefully that new piece of shit will be gone by tomorrow.  Not gonna lie to you, it hurt me terribly to read those things. But then I got thinking that you guys don’t really have a shit to give about what I look like on the outside so from me to Pig Vomit; eat a Dick.  Preferably one riddled with syphilis.  your day is coming very soon and the whole world is going know who you are.

Speaking of pigs, today in Stabby land things got almost interesting for a second. Here are the Bombshells, spoiler (not really) of the day. Stabby has a boyfriend. He has so far not been named, but he has been in court and he visits her in jail all the time. Remember you read it here a few blogs ago when I said some Stabby groupie would marry her and never have sex again.

We lost another Juror and it is all Beth Karas’ fault. During the first break, she was doing an on camera segment outside of the courthouse. She realized that a juror was standing nearby but figured she couldn’t hear shit so she carried on. Karas said that when she came back into the courthouse, the dumbass juror approached her and asked if she was Nancy Grace.   Karas answered that she used to work with Grace and then reported the idiot to the court. So, we have another fame whore wanna be, and goddamn they seem to be coming out of the fucking wood don’t they, except this one doesn’t know the difference between Nancy Grace and Beth Karas. Probably hoping to get a job on HLN. Beth Karas totally did the right thing, and as an officer of the court (she is still a member of the bar) she was actually compelled to do so. My guess, another stealth juror who could later throw the trial by saying they’d heard the interview yada yada mistrial. Sometimes Judge Sherry reiterated her admonition to stay the fuck away from televisions and newspapers and social media, because yeah, that’s totally going to happen.

As far as the actual trial itself, it is pretty much the abridged version of the first trial. Dr. Kevin Horn, pathologist/underwear model was on the stand and we went through each and every one of Travis’ wounds again. That poor, poor man. I hate Stabby a little bit more each and every time I hear penetrating stab wound, incised wound, defensive wound. How he must have fought to live. How terrified do you think he was? And somehow, I can hear her laughing at his terror, telling him that if she couldn’t have him than nobody ever would. I don’t know why I think that, but I really do.

The fact that back in 2009 Flores said the order of wounds was different was brought up. It was also brought up that these were Flores own thoughts on the sequence of events and
that the medical examiner had never told him that. Horn confirmed that he had never told him that.

Jenny from the cell block got up and took a pretty good run at Dr. Horn. She couldn’t shake him, but she did win the talent portion of the competition. Dr. Horn was firm on his wound infliction timeline. He was stabbed a billion times (at least that’s what it felt like), she slit his throat and then just for the fuck of it she shot him in the head. I think the idea of multiple weapons was so she could claim multiple intruders if it came down to it and she did.

Stabby was also caught making fuck me eyes at on of the male Jurors by Henri DelRey, one of the reporters in the courtroom. Remember kids, all you need is one.

Now, on to the sick twist that is Bob Bashara:
Today, Mark O’Riordan, with the U.S. Secret Service, told jurors about his Jan. 27, 2012, interview of Bashara. During that interview he admitted that he had had an affair 8 years earlier but claimed to not be banging some bondage bitch prior to his wife being killed. Then he pulled out the “I am a rotary club president therefore I am above reproach” card.

The witness of the day prize went to Janet Leehmann. She told the court that Bashara was a big fat liar because he was in Oregon banging her (literally and figuratively) two weeks before his wife was murdered. They met on alt.com which is exactly what it sounds like and I’m not going to see for myself. He asked her to consider relocating to Grosse Pointe from Oregon and told her that his Daddy was a big time judge which is no doubt why he figured he could kill his wife and not really worry about it. Bashara, who Leehmann referred to as Master Bob told her that he and Rachel Gillett, the longtime mistress he totally wasn’t having an affair with, were looking for a third person to join them at Shirley’s house of pain and pleasure.

For Christmas, Bashara got her a $25 gift card to the Olive Garden with some of his wife’s money since he didn’t have any, and a leather string to wear on her wrist as a symbol of his ownership of her. “You are to wear it on your left wrist and not wear it around your neck until I’m there to put it there myself,” he wrote her.

She got a message saying she would soon feel his strength and passion. (excuse me I need the puke bucket again) Leehmann thought she was getting into some light bondage and instead what she got into was a beating that left her marked up for over 3 months because of course Bashara is one of those sick fucks that can’t get it up unless he’s beating on a woman.

After his wife just turned up dead to his complete and utter shock, he told Leehmann that they should not be in contact for a while which was cool with her, she figured she could just quietly peace the fuck out, but then the sicko called her and said he wanted her to hid his other mistress in Oregon with her. She took a pass, called the cops and got a restraining order. Smart girl.

Bashara’s trial continues tomorrow and because it is so much more interesting than Stabby 2.0 I will be covering it as well.

That is all for tonight kids. This is Really Big Mean Dog peacing the fuck out. Have a great night.

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The Really Big Mean Dog School of Law: Motion to Quash Motion to Quash Consideration of Death Penalty

October 4, 2014

-I can write an amicus brief, as well as my motion to quash, contemporaneously – Arizona

Hello Class.  Professor Kelly is very busy today so please sit down and take notes.  Today’s lesson will be on frivolous motions that have no bearing on anything ever.  Apparently in Arizona, you can bring the exact same motion before the court eleventy billion times in the hopes that the judge might let one slip past.  Well, this Law Professor is not having it so I am bringing a motion to quash the motion to quash.

First, a quick lesson on motions.

Motion in United States law. In United States law, a motion is a procedural device to bring a limited, contested issue before a court for decision. It is a request to the judge (or judges) to make a decision about the case.

A motion to quash is a request to a court to render a previous decision of that court or a lower judicial body null or invalid. It can arise out of mistakes made by any lawyer in a court proceeding.

A motion to quash in the case of The Great State of Arizona and King Juan 1 V Stabby Anal Arias is a request to the court to render a perfectly valid decision invalid because the Queen of the Universe is starting to see that needle in her dreams. 

Once a motion has been filed, unfortunately the presiding judge has no choice but the read the stupid fucking thing, laugh hysterically, pass it around to the office so they can all laugh hysterically and then stamp a big fat DENIED on it.

Now I have been a Law Professor for weeks and I have never seen a motion that is 59 pages long ever. That was not a type-o. Alfred E. is pulling out all the stops on this one. If he is going down it is going to be in flames since this is possibly the most insane and incoherent motion that this Law Professor has ever read. It’s almost like he let pigvomit write it.

Because I feel really bad that Judge Stephens has to read and rule on this thing, I have decided to bring my own goddamn motion. My Motion To Quash the Motion to Quash the Consideration of the Death Penalty appears below. I managed to come in at somewhere under 59 pages, so no world record for me.

Professor Kelly Really Big Mean Dog McFadden #666666
Really Big Mean Dog School Of Law
52 Main Street Rockford
Buttfuck No Where
Planet Earth- Mostly
youaresoscrewed@gmail.com

Attorney of record for defense of actual lawyers everywhere and probably the constitution
This motion is brought forth in answer to war and peace uh, I mean the 59 page motion filed by Alfred E. Nurmi and his band of lackey’s et al.

It is the contention of the Really Big Mean Dog School of Law that the Motion to dismiss State’s Notice Of Intent to Seek the Death Penalty Due to Continued State Misconduct is flawed on several levels and therefore I respectfully present my motion to quash their motion to quash the states motion of intent to seek the death penalty.

I make this motion based on Stabby’s choice to continue to engage in a persistent pattern of general fuckery which has left her in a position where she has not a leg to stand on.
When considering this motion I ask the court to consider only real facts and not the ones that Stabby and her minions have made up. You know, like the fact that she almost cut Travis’ head off. Finally, given the ever changing nature of the stories she makes up, I reserve the right to supplement this motion any time I feel like it.

Summary of Argument.

The bitch did it.
The bitch admitted she did it.
The bitch does not have a non made up mitigating factor anywhere.

Relevant Facts

She stabbed a man 27 times, cut his neck so deep his head almost fell off and shot him.
She did it because she was a jealous narcissistic butthurt bitch.
She couldn’t care less that she killed a man.

Other Relevant Facts

Someone made up a fake account for Detective Flores Wife with the handle Imbossthatway
We all know that it was Sandra Webber
She is doing everything in her power to get herself put into the middle of this trial
She may or may not be hot for the defendant
She is trying very hard to ruin the reputation of a fine detective and his very lovely wife
She needs to stop before shit gets real.
All the other crap in the motion to dismiss has already been seen about as many times as Stabby’s cooch.

Facts Relating to the State Letting Potential Mitigation Witnesses Know That if They Lied They Would Be Charged With Perjury

Patty Womack was warned that she would be questioned on the murder money she got for selling pictures to various media outlets. Patty was worried since she is on Welfare and she could be charged and her free money taken away, which would cause her to not be able to procure drugs.
Matt McCartney was warned that he would be charged with perjury for lying about Travis being a pedophile.
Mom of Stabby was told she would be questioned about all the non beatings and all the fun things she had to say about her psycho daughter during police questioning.

Conclusion

The defenses actions in the case tell a tale of misconduct and fame seeking which started long before this trial ever did. As the facts of the above very obviously demonstrate, this motion should have never been brought forth and I urge the court to regard it for what it is; another waste of a lot of perfectly good paper and yet another stall tactic by the defense. I request that the motion be quashed.

Respectfully Submitted this 4th day of October 2014

Kelly M McFadden
Professor of Law and Dean of Fuckery
Really Big Mean Dog School Of Law.

And there you have it class, a perfectly written motion to quash. Class dismissed.

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Could That Sound I Hear be a………Backfire?

September 22, 2014

Wishing I could clone Sheriff Joe – Arizona

Hai Kids. Well, by now you have already heard the stunning (spoiler: No one is stunned)news that Stabby’s esteemed Judge has decided that now is the time to black out the courtroom. Um, you all have to become Lawyers and practice law and shit before you become Judges in Arizona right? I shook my head so damn hard when I read the wording of that decision I think a gave myself a concussion. Just, WOW. Huge error in my opinion. For whatever it’s worth. Before we get into the meat of Sheriff Joe’s latest, I wanted to let you all know that I have put a donation button up on the bottom of my blog. Why? Because writing really is my job. It is strictly voluntary. VOLUNTARY. You don’t haveta if you don’t wanna.

Why can you spell Sheriff with two R’s or one R and spellcheck does not have a fuck to give? I can’t even use Canadian spelling or my computer has an aneurism. What is that about?

Sheriff Joe is suddenly hitting all the high notes for me peeps. His beautifully written fuck off and die letter to that film maker was so beautiful I wanted to weep. Sherriff Joe upped the ante today when he rolled off a letter regarding Stabby and the press tour she still seems intent on having.

Since Sheriff Joe stepped out of the closet, he has been intent on burning that bitch down. No longer a quiet Stabby hater, Sherriff Joe now seems intent on letting us see via written word every ounce of contempt he holds for Stabby. I wonder if he actually almost bit his tongue off trying to bite back his feelings of utter contempt for Stabbykins, and he said fuck it, I’m not injuring myself for some murdering slut? Or something.

Anyway, today Sheriff Joe released another doozy of a letter letting the press, the citizens of Arizona, me, and earth in general know just how hard he thinks Stabby should suck it.

Sherriff Joe said, to paraphrase:………From the Sheriff Joe Homey Don’t Play That House of Indefinite Incarceration……….

Because all of you assholes can make money off a murdering twat no matter what bullshit comes out of her mouth and I know there will be fiftyfivebillion requests, I have decided to shut all you bitches down before you even get started.

In case any of you forgot, the bitch has already been convicted of first degree murder.

She is a complete narcissist who is very good at manipulating the simple minded. She is actually getting these idiots to sell things for her. She even tried to get a documentary filmed about her but I shut that shit down.

I understand that television stations need to make some cheddar, but not on my watch. Bitch had lied long enough and I am sick and tired of listening to her bullshit. Therefore, if you haven’t already figured it out, any requests for interviews with this sadistic bitch will be DENIED.

Actual Press release below.

Arias no media

Oh Sheriff Joe. Your immense annoyance makes me weep with joy. I think I love you Sheriff Joe. I think we all do.

Oh, and while we don’t get cameras, the lovely and talented Jen from Trial Diaries is able to tweet so we can at least sort of know what’s going on.

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Stabby Needs Her Glasses Back.

September 19, 2014

Writing my grocery list in pencil and hanging it in a gallery – Arizona

Hai everybody. It’s me, Stabby hater extraordinaire Kelly. Seeing as how I am a Scot born and bred, I have spent a large portion of the night focused on the referendum. I’m on the fence about whether I want independence or not. Part of me is worried about the economic implications of succession and part of me wants to paint my face blue and ride a horse out onto the battlefield. part of me thinks I should put away my Braveheart DVD and go to bed. I am very happy that Scotland has a chance to attain something Stabby will never have again. FREEDOM!! Alba Gu Brath!

Stabby has fired up all the engines on the mitigating factors jet and is currently flying it into the stratosphere. She is donating money to every goddamn place that will accept money from a CONVICTED MURDERESS, she has donated her hair to mops of love, and now she has sold a self portrait so she can donate the murder money. The only problem is that Stabby can’t see her reflection in her stainless steel toilet bowl very well. I think it is because she tried to hock her totally not fake eyeglasses. Here is the pic she came up with.

Stabby self portrait not the one

As you can see, there are some serious problems with the picture. Really, the only thing she got right was the flat head and the dead look in her eyes. I am shocked that an artist of this caliber……….Bwahahahahahahaha(OMG I’m sorry I could not type that without bursting out laughing; very unprofessional of me) Anyway, there are people out there who only want to help others perfect their art and someone took the time to try and help Stabby fix hers. They put in some of the stuff Stabby forgot, which I think was very kind of them. This is what they came up with.

Stabby self portrait real

Please notice that while this picture is also not perfect, it is a much more realistic representation of Stabby. The self serving smirk. The dead look in the slightly crossed eyes. The scraggly bangs. The asymmetrical face. The missing weapons. Of course for the picture to be complete we would need to add bad acne and some horns but this was the much better try in my opinion.

Still working on all things Stabby. Hoping to bring you an update on the whole J4Stabby mess and how ChaCha ties into it all. Have a lovely night kids.

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I Promise to Tell the Truth, Part of the Truth, or None of the Truth……Whatever is Working For Me at The Time……Maybe.

September 17, 2014

The “Sherriff Joe Homey Don’t Play That House of Indefinite Incarceration” may have room for one more soon – Arizona

Hai Kids. It’s me, number 1 (Okay number 2 if you count Juan) Stabby hater extraordinaire Kelly. I am here with updates. We have actual written down in the court minutes trial dates. Jury Selection will start September 29th and the PENALTY PHASE RETRIAL is set to run through December 12, 2014 with the court dark on Fridays. I figure Judge Stephens finally said fuck it, every weekend is a long weekend till this bitch is off my docket forever. She has fully stocked the side-bar and has personally tested all the bottles to make sure they do indeed contain liquor.

Golden Corral has hired extra line cooks in preparation for the 200lbs Alfred E. Nurmi is going to put back on during this shit show.

All weed dealers in the immediate area have checked their phone lines and made sure they are still on Jenny From the Cell Blocks speed dial. Pageant moms across Arizona have submitted original designs for gowns for the glamour portion of the trial.

Esteban Flores has stocked up on good boy treats and checked the catch pole to make sure the loop closes properly. His order of squeaky Nurmi dog toys is expected next week.

The court vet has double checked his tranquilizer supply and fired off a couple of test rounds to make sure the gun is firing properly. Wouldn’t want a miss-fire in the courtroom when Juan is really foaming at the mouth.

Juan has finally calmed down from his laughing fit and was seen mauling an attack dummy in preparation for the re-trial.

Stabby has been endlessly doodling in hopes of an impromptu art show of her totally ripped off from other artists designs. Tracing is a mitigating factor you know.

ChaCha Delarosa Was seen trying on outfits to wear to the re-trial. She was going for a more professional look this time. I think it worked.
ChaCha DeLaRosa

Alyce in Blunderland has not come out of hiding since the first trial.

Stabby’s Pencil was seen getting a new point. Looking sharp Pencil!!

All the Chairs of the Court are safe in the Ikea protection program. The will be brought to court by moving van convoy flanked by swat teams early on the morning of the 29th.

The ninjas and the screwdriver Skateboard gang were unavailable for comment.

Lisa Schilling and Jason Weber were last seen in Las Vegas. Their whereabouts now is unknown.


Stabby’s Bangs Said to Say Hi.

September 15, 2014

Typing with one hand because my left ring finger is kinda jacked – Arizona

Oh hai kids. Todays blog will be brought to you by Fakor eyewear in remembrance of Stabby’s glasses. Sadly, we were unable to negotiate a hostage trade for them. I want you to know we did our best. We offered, poprocks, tootsie pops, a couple of forged documents, 2 strawberry frapachinos and a penicillin shot in exchange for the glasses. They countered with the locations of Nurmi’s and all the other chairs of the court which obviously we could not do. Sorry Stabby’s glasses. We tried our best.

Since we were unable to secure their release, Stabby’s glasses are up for auction for a starting bid of 500 dollars. Net proceeds to be donated to an unnamed “charity.” This is on the Auntie Stabby run site as opposed to the J4Stabby site which is the one run by our Ice Cream party/Vegas loving friend Lisa Schilling and Jason the Grifter/Piece of human Garbage Weber. The best part of this auction is that you have to put up a “refundable” $250 in order to bid. I have a couple of problems with this auction. The first one being net proceeds. If there are net proceeds that means that there were gross proceeds. While I agree that it’s Stabby so there is likely gross everything, I am very curious as to what her overhead costs were for this auction. Now, I have not attended the Dyson School of Applied Economics which may/may not actually exist, but I do know what gross and net mean. I have also noticed that on all of Stabby’s totally original tracings of other actual artworks, the same verbiage appears. So, what are we deducting from what we actually bring in (gross) to come up with what actually gets donated (net)? Stabby’s eye glasses would have been paid for by the State of Arizona during her incarceration so we can’t deduct the cost of those. Auntie Stabby has already said she refused to take an administration fee to look after Stabby’s stuff, so nope not that. I’m pretty sure ChaCha just smuggled the glasses out of jail so they didn’t have to be mailed or picked up by Auntie stabby so there is no overhead there either. Odd. The only other thing I can think if is the actual auction costs which I am guessing are going to be right around $500 or up. Wow, I solved a mystery.

Stabby was in court today so Judge Stephens could remove her as her own attorney and re-appoint Alfred E. Nurmi as her lawyer. She also said there would be no ex-parte hearing which totally pissed Stabby off. While I am starting to really dislike Judge Stephens she did get a few brownie points for the ex-parte refusal.

Stabby has a new hairdo. Since trial might actually be looming, Stabby actually had to cut her hair in case anybody came out of the fog long enough to remember all that crap about donating it for wigs for cancer patients. It actually worked out well for her because she looked even uglier than she did during the first trial. Prison food is also not agreeing with poor Stabby. Without her make-up artists you can see that Stabby has developed quite the zit flare-up. She could not help but gaze longingly into the pool camera during the entire proceeding.

Next we moved on to the camera motion. Our valiant little pitbull Juan Martinez has finally weighed in on the camera question. Since it is entirely possible that Juan hates Stabby more than anybody else on the planet, he decided that if there was a way to fuck with her, he would find it and use it. Today he came down on the side of having the PENALTY PHASE retrial aired. For those of you that don’t remember, up until now the state has taken no position on airing the retrial. Today he stated that it is the prosecutors opinion that the felon simply wants to control what information is or is not released publicly as proved by her giving several interviews throughout the trial including an interview right after the verdict. He sat down and Judge Stephens threw him a good-boy treat.

David Bodney, the very good attorney who represents several media outlets argued strenuously to allow the camera’s once again into the courtroom. He made many excellent points, stating that court proceedings are supposed to be public not cloaked in secrecy. He said that Stabby herself was the one who willingly and with seeming glee jumped onto the (“Yay, a camera I am going to be so famous”) bandwagon and the public should not be punished because she can’t control herself. He also said that to not allow them is frankly unconstitutional sighting supreme court decisions about camera’s in the courtroom. He asked for anyone to offer one bit of case law that argued differently. I personally want this trial aired on TV for very obvious reasons, but that aside Mr. Bodney is correct. He wants the ruling amended to a 30 minute delay between sessions which seems fairly equitable to me. Oh look, I brought the big book of words out again. YAY!!

Nurmi was next on the lets see if we can just argue this motion until she dies of natural causes train, but since Nurmi is totally over this whole mess, he didn’t really argue to strenuously or coherently for that matter. He said something about having assured the mitigations witnesses (really? They found more than one?) that there would be a media blackout. He said he was trying to protect Stabby from herself. He said that just because there were not enough seats in the courtroom was no reason that the re-trial needed to be aired to the world which to me says that the people that can get seats are somehow more deserving of seeing the trial. Apparently I was not the only one who saw it that way as Mr. Bodney also has a huge problem with that statement. While Alfred E. Nurmi is once again the first chair, the arguments he presented today were insignificant enough to show that he isn’t exactly thrilled about it. Everybody now feel bad for Nurmi. Or don’t, either or is good.

In other exciting Stabby news, she has waived her right to be at tomorrows hearing to go over jury selection procedure. Jury selection is still on to start on September 29th but I am not holding my breath. Expect either another “suicide attempt”, hospitalization for a brain tumor or a switch to unable to proceed due to her multiple personalities not being able to agree on what course of action to take. Someone tweeted for Stabby that it is taking new migraine medication so I’m betting on the brain tumor.

That’s it for tonight everybody. We have shit developing regarding ChaCha Delarosa and how deeply she is connected to the whole Stabby money collection scam. I will as always keep you updated.


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