Hello my poor darling lovelies. It is I, your very sad and tired Queen of all I survey, resident sarcasm expert, law professor, doctor of doctoring, honorary DVM, pretend Judge, hater of DCFS and CAS (that one is the Canadian version) anti-animal cruelty proponent, horse whisperer, and dog lactation consultant and purveyor of the run on sentence, here today, sadly to talk to you about your gun problem. Yes, I said your gun problem, because even if you want to stick your head in the sand and drag out your right bear arms and whatever other fuckery you have, you all have a gun problem. Or maybe it’s a violence problem.
The news that there has been another mass shooting in the good old gun toting US of A is getting so profoundly regular that it is to the point where people in Canada are now saying “and?” The conspiracy theorists are saying it is an attempt by Trump to get the heat off of what is going on in the Government right now to which I say, and you can quote me “fuck you, you sick motherfuckers.” Even Donald Trump, whom I despise as both the president and as a human being (term human being used very loosely here) would not orchestrate the killing of children doing nothing more sinister than going to school. That is just asshole bullshit and it needs to be shutdown before people start to believe it. I have a suggestion. Get out of gramma’s basement for an hour, take a walk, buy some more tinfoil, maybe see a therapist, get a puppy, whatever, but saying things like that on a platform that is capable of reaching the entire world is irresponsible, incendiary and cruel. Say whatever you want about the President, I do, but do not accuse him of having children killed to get the heat off of himself.
461 people have been killed just in mass shootings in your country so far this year. That is just the dead ones. Wounded, scared for life etc have not been counted because yay for them, they get to live with the memory of that for the rest of their lives. They get to play woulda, coulda, shoulda, for the remainder of their days however many they individually get to have. It’s a real fun game. Why did I beg my parent to take me to a concert that they didn’t even want to go to, why did I send my baby to school today, I had a day off we could have just hung out for the day, why did I choose today to take my child to the mall when they didn’t even want to go. What was I thinking? What was I thinking? What in the fuck was I thinking?
So, we have five confirmed dead, one of them the shooter, at least two confirmed injured children, injured adults and the cherry on top of this shit Sundae is the now deceased piece of shit had had several calls placed to the police about his increasingly erratic behaviour and the amount of bullets that he had been firing off for target practice. According to one source who wished to remain anonymous, “there should have been some sort of vetting process by law enforcement once one complaint was filed never mind several, as to whether or not this individual should have weapons.” Geez, ya think?
Several people outside of the school said they heard at least a hundred rounds go off. That was not just one person saying that, that was multiple people saying at least a hundred rounds, and well over a hundred rounds, and if I had to guess I’d say way over a hundred rounds. So I’m going to go out on a limb and say that there were probably over a hundred rounds discharged. A woman outside of the school said she saw a boy shot first in the foot and then the chest.
The shooting started out as a domestic violence incident and then fuckface went full Rambo and lost his shit. He shot a woman and child in a vehicle and then made his way to the school. He shot through the school windows and it is still unclear whether or not he actually entered the building.
It gets better. There are at least 5 different crime scenes for the police to wade through. A thing that would not have been necessary if they had just checked on this cocksuckers viability as a gun owner before hand. Oh wait. They are trying to make it EASIER for the mentally unbalanced to obtain guns now right? Must be another of those brilliant ideas that we peons are all too stupid to understand, but which makes perfect sense to the people trying to push it through.
I have said it before, I will say it again, probably a hundred million times but I am still going to say it. The only people in the world that require automatic weapons are military and police. Other than that, automatic weapons should not be available to anyone at anytime for any reason and you can stuff your right to bear arms right up your ass. Bear all the arms you want. Handguns? Go nuts. Shotguns? Fill ur boots. Rifles? Pick your rifle and go sustenance hunt. Automatic weapon? WHAT THE FUCK FOR? Unless you are fully expecting to be attacked by a herd of Bull African Elephants, then NO. Just no.
Do you know why people in your country are basically allowed to purchase whatever weapons they want whenever they want? Because the NRA owns congress. Can I prove that? Nope, but I am working on it. You all know it’s true thought right? They have way too much sway with congress for anyone with a functioning frontal lobe to be comfortable. Now those that are certifiably mentally unstable should be allowed to own weapons that kill people. Well, all weapons kill people. You can kill someone with a tin can lid if you are dedicated enough to the cause I suppose. A pen. Yup you can kill someone with a pen. Potato? Absolutely if you have a bit of ingenuity. There is not much that cannot be used as a weapon and most of them can kill people. The difference is that, there is a lot lower probability of mass casualties with a tin can lid or a lead pipe or even a fucking revolver. An automatic weapon can kill people until you either get bored, get shot, the gun jams or you straight up just run out of ammo. You don’t even have to be a good shot. Just hold the trigger and wave the thing back and forth. You are going to injure and kill a lot of people. If you happen to be dedicated to what you are about to do you can kill everything in your path.
Now, I am not an anti gun zealot. I am a get rid of stupid laws zealot and your gun laws are straight up insane. They left retarded and went straight to potato when the mentally ill got dragged into those that should be allowed to have guns.
Tell me, without dragging out the 2nd amendment, what would be wrong with all applicants undergoing a screening process, which includes a safety course, criminal history and background checks, provision of personal references, and a mandatory waiting period.We are taking automatic weapons right off of the table. What is the big deal about that.
In 2012 there were a total of 8813 homicides by gun in the United States. In the same year there were 172 gun related homicides in Canada. Those are real, verifiable numbers. Your country makes up roughly 4.4 percent of the global population but you own 42 percent of the guns in the world. THE WORLD.
From January 1 2017 to today there have been a total of 10007 murders by gun. That number does not include accidental shootings or things of that nature. So are you guys trying to have gun violence added as an Olympic event or something? Or are you on a secret mission of population control at 50 or 60 at a time? You all know about birth control right? It is a lot less messy.
Okay, all morbid joking aside, for those of you that are sane, please start doing something, anything. Write to your congressmen/women, go to rallies…or maybe don’t that would be a good place to get shot, but do something. The amount of fuckery involved in the gun lobby is like nothing I have ever seen and that isn’t even taking Ted Nugent into account. You all should have him removed to an island somewhere by the way, just sayin.
And just for you of the guns don’t kill people, people kill people. PEOPLE WITH GUNS KILL PEOPLE. FUCK IT ISN’T THAT HARD.
RBMD peacing the fuck out